Honey, you're not man enough...

Philippines
February 21, 2012 7:32pm CST
While getting some coffee at work, I overheard two employees talking about their husbands. Since I was only getting coffee, I wasn't able to capture the rest of what they are talking about but one was complaining that her husband knows how to cook and do dishes but does not know anything about handiwork, and boy, there was disgust on both their faces. It got me to thinking: Does it make a man less than a man if they don't know how to do the handiwork at home like plumbing, a little of carpentry and fixing broken things at home? It makes me concerned about what other people's perception is because I don't know anything about plumbing, or fixing broken pipes, or repairing broken faucets, or putting the air conditioner apart and putting it back together again, or even a little amount of carpentry-- without adding Google to the mix. And yet, it is always expected to be common knowledge to any man, and somehow, some people feel icky to the fact that some men just aren't keen on stuff like that. Is it fair enough to always expect this skill to be innate to a man? Does it make one less of a man if they simply can't do stuff like that?
4 people like this
10 responses
@cyclopz (197)
• Philippines
23 Feb 12
I think insted of talking about it behind a person's back it would be much better if she would just confront his husband if it really matters. Having an open communication is really very essential in a relationship for it to work and it would also require the cooperation of both partners. Each one is quite unique and there are time a person may be good at something but also not good at another. It doesn't mean that since he is the guy in the relationship it doesn't mean that he would have to do everything that is traditionally being done by husbands in a marriage. Each partner should try to understand one another and help each other out instead of putting him/her down. The most important thing in the said situation is to find a remidy if the husband really can't do what is being expected of him, either hire someone to do those things or ask him to learn how to do those things especially when he has all the spare time to do so. Same thing also goes to wives out there, it doesn't make them less of a woman if they don't know how to cook, wash clothes or even do the dishes.
• Canada
22 Feb 12
I don't think it is fair to always expect these skills to be innate in a man and we shouldn't judge them based on these things. I feel that everyone has their own talents and skills which makes them unique and important so even if they are not good at plumbing, carpentry, etc but theymay be very talented at something else. It certainly doesn't make them any less of a man. For example, we have many good male chefs around the world but just because they are good at cooking it doesn't mean they are any less of a man. They are in fact very talented at their work and have skills that not a lot of people have so why should we judge anyone...
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Feb 12
People have to realize times have changed, in the past carpentry was majority of the job market, and men use to take the time and work on their own homes because they couldn't afford to pay someone else to do it. and now your not required to do your own handy work you probably can afford to pay someone to do it for you. so the more recent generation really don't know about that kind of work. a lot of men now are business men or have jobs that don't require such experience. I don't think they are less of a man because they don't have such skill that's like saying a women isn't a real women because she doesn't know how to cook some women did not learn to cook or were not made to cook therefore lacking the skill
1 person likes this
@oneidmnster (1389)
• United States
22 Feb 12
I work in home improvement retail and I believe men should have basic knowledge of how to do simple home repairs. I'm not talking about taking things apart and putting them back together. I'm talking about putting up a fence picket or changing the battery on a car. Things like this are easy and every man should know how to do. Now days women know how to do things more than men. Also,my wife knows more about plumbing and electricity than I do. Of course,she worked those departments at a retail store.
1 person likes this
@maezee (32288)
• United States
22 Feb 12
I would have to say we all don't fit into our gender roles that society kind of portrays. I know I'm not the girliest of girls. And I know guys who have somewhat feminine attributes but are 100% straight/hetero. I don't think anyone fits into the mold, but they definitely TRY to in fear of being seen as not masculine enough. For example, a guy trying to fix the plumbing on his own (because it's the 'manly' thing to do), even if it means screwing it up beyond repair. *rolls eyes*.
1 person likes this
• China
22 Feb 12
Most woman just want their husband to be a man who can help them when they feel helpless...It dosen't mean a real man need do something like these.many men have knowledge of these because they picked it up when they try to help their wifes...I think the care and love might be something a man should have.
1 person likes this
@Iriene88 (5352)
• Malaysia
22 Feb 12
My husband does not do all these DIY tasks. I did expect him to know at least some level of this type of handiwork. So, I am quite disappointed though. However he did call for the expert to do the task. I just do not bother much as long as it is done, irrespective who did it However, just before he retired, he did try to change the tap himself, clean the air-cond filter, change the basic bulbs, starter etc. Some improvement
@Mashnn (4503)
22 Feb 12
I do not think that we should gauge our husband on what they are capable of doing ot especially with things like plumbing. I would be more worried about unfaithful husband rather than whether my husband was good in plumbing or such things.
1 person likes this
@prinzcy (5058)
• Malaysia
25 Feb 12
I don't mind if my man can't do the repairing as those stuff require a bit of skills. It's not something that everyone can do. Plus it's stereotype for a man to fix things and a woman should be able to cook. But I see it's a drag if my partner can't drive a car. I guess my requirement is a bit different from others.
@clouds0327 (1390)
• Philippines
22 Feb 12
Nope of course not. But you can learn it. You'll learn it when the situation calls for it. Don't stress about it that much it doesn't really matter. You can learn in the process.