Cowardice move?

@donsky14 (5963)
Philippines
March 5, 2012 7:45am CST
I had an issue in the office...I was linked to this guy, and it affected me and my partner's relationship. So now, what I did was I applied for a new job...got a job offer...and will be resigning. I have a better pay there and my insurance is definitely better than what they offered me for this new job. Career wise, I know its a stupid move. But if I stay, I know me and my partner would have a hard time moving on and healing. I remembered my supervisor saying that its a cowardice move to resign and leave. But my point is...I'm sacrificing everything to give my partner a peaceful mind. Is this a cowardice move?
14 responses
@jkct02 (2859)
• Malaysia
6 Mar 12
What you do was not cowardice. In fact it was courageous. There is nothing too big to give up for the love of you life. But are you sure that is the only way to solve the problem? Maybe a change of department/office/branch within the same company can be worked out, so that you need not change your job? If that is not possible, maybe what you are about to do is the only way out. Anyway, we will never know what is at the other side of the rainbow until we reach there. I wish you every success in whatever you are going to do.
@donsky14 (5963)
• Philippines
6 Mar 12
Thank you jckt02...it is kinda scary to start something new again after 3 years. And yes, your right, will never know until we get there.
1 person likes this
@cutepenguin (6457)
• Canada
6 Mar 12
I don't see how it's that big of a sacrifice if you have better pay and insurance. Taking a hit to your career is never fun, but sometimes you have to do what's best for your life outside of work.
@donsky14 (5963)
• Philippines
6 Mar 12
If continuing with my career means loosing my partner...then I'm willing to sacrifice for that. I could always start in the new company that I'll be with.
@dpk262006 (56098)
• Delhi, India
9 Mar 12
Hi don! You have already taken a decision to quit and change your job. You should not regret your decision or should not pay heed to what others say. It is your life and your decision and if you feel that changing job is going to help you and will grant you some peace, it can not be said as a cowardice move.
@espoir (184)
• China
6 Mar 12
Totally. You should try to change the situation or even fight for yourself. Changing for another job should be your last solution.
@obe212003 (2302)
• Philippines
6 Mar 12
Since you've got an issue in the office that needs to be cleared up, but have chosen to resign, then in a way i think you kind of making an escape from that issue. How can your partner have peace of mind if the issue isn't settled yet? It is not an assurance that having a new job would somehow keep the issue to stop haunting you. Better settle the matter at hand, clear your name, and then go..
@jhuddith (222)
• Philippines
6 Mar 12
If you no longer feel comfortable working with the guy linked to you, then I believe you made the right decision. But, if not, why should you need to resign. I've been through the similar situation back in college when I joined a school club. There was a guy linked to me. The problem is I'm not comfortable with that. After a year or so, I decided to resign from the said club and just told them that I want to focus more on my studies as I might lost it if I had to many things to focus on. I know it seemed like I was a quitter but I don't think it that way. I found a relief and consider it the best thing to do. The feeling is great when you are doing the things that you think is best for you. As for your case, I would still say that you may resign from this company that you are working right now, but why the rush? I still suggest that you find the best company that you can transfer to. Hopefully, it will not take you that long to find one. Good luck to your decision!
@Metatronik (5899)
• Pasay, Philippines
6 Mar 12
Just leave the opinion of your supervisor. I think you just made the right decision. You were lucky enough that you were able to get a job with better salary and benefits compare to the previous one. It is just that you have to MOVE ON as what you are doing. I mean can you work well with a guy that affects your relationship with your partner? Probably you can't concentrate. It is better to go away with it.
@JenInTN (27565)
• United States
6 Mar 12
Oh no...I don't think it is cowardice if it is right for you. That is the key. Just because there is more money and insurance, that doesn't define happiness. I was once told that careers are those that go up and down before leveling off and becoming stable. I think that relationships can be the same way. The thing is though that the job is your livelihood but the relationship is your life. Does that make sense?
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
5 Mar 12
So, it is up to whether this new job which might give your partner a peace of mind, or you current job might provide a better career path for you. It is your choice, and you have to mentally weigh the importance of each. Your future career or your relationship with your partner? Or is there alternative way not to resign while you can keep your boyfriend?
• Canada
5 Mar 12
I think it depends on how your looking at if it's cowardice or not. I believe you should try and work things out with the guy who is affecting your relationship with your partner. Allot of people walk away from issues that really should be addressed and if they are addressed and no amicable solution can be made then by all means move on to another position, or try to move within the company your currently working for to maintain your career path. Now the other side of the coin, you say you applied and was accepted for a new position, it's more salary and insurance wise but it's a horrible career path. Are you going to regret making this move should something happen between your partner and you? Are you going to have this in the back of your mind that you left a job you may have enjoyed to please your partner and end up holding a personal hatred for the decision you made? This is something only you know the answer to because ultimately it's going to affect you in the long run. Good luck I hope you make the right choice.
• United States
5 Mar 12
I do not think that it is a cowardice move, but I also do not necessarily think that it is the best move, either. I understand that you want to have a better relationship with your partner and put your partner's mind at ease, and that is a good thing. However, what is going to stop your partner from worrying about guys at your new job? Are you going to quit and/or change jobs every time your partner gets jealous of a guy at your workplace? Instead of changing jobs, I think it would be better to work on your relationship and help your partner to have confidence in your relationship and trust you no matter where you work.
@choybel (5059)
• Philippines
5 Mar 12
I don't condemn your act but I would just like to ask, why are you the only one doing something about it? I think there is another way to solve it, and it is not easy to find a good job nowadays. Most people would probably do everything to have a descent paying job, especially with better benefits. I think you should think this through. It is also your future you are about to change here.
@toniganzon (47891)
• Philippines
5 Mar 12
No. You did the bravest thing to save the most important thing in your life. You're very courageous to make your partner as your priority. You made a choice and for me if you're happy with that choice then you just made the perfect one. Don't listen to what other's say. It's your life not theirs.
@MandaLee (3692)
• United States
5 Mar 12
Dear Donsky, I would say so. Why don't you stay and try to resolve the situation with your partner? Have a wonderful day!