should i call her and try to fix things? or is it a lost cause?

United States
April 23, 2012 12:46am CST
a week ago me and my neighbor got into the huge fight when she was at my house trying to help me and my husband do some things. she was drinking and i had a few shots but not enough to really matter. my husband and i told her to go home for about 30min to an hour so we could relax. she didnt want to so we went out back to take our 30 min and then the last 30 min was suppose to be so we could eat dinner. after 20 min she says "i aint gonna be in here doing it all by myself" well i have a big mouth sometimes and i said "you dont have to be here, we told you to go home" well me and him went back inside to help her and she left us to go home. we texted for a while then she called me and she said "if in 30min you still want my help call me" well about 25 min later she texted me "i dont cry that aint fair i am done". i did text and say i was sry and good night then 2 hrs later she texted me "ur kids shorts and coloring book r outside on my porch" the next morning she has my kids dressed out side on my porch (not sure how ling they had been there). then i leave and come back and there is an envelope inside my screen door with my KIDS medicade cards in it and my phone card and a few other personal things that would have been really bad if someone would have gotten a hold of it. she didnt tell me they were out there or nothing. my grandma feels she was being shildish....well a few days later i texted her for my b-day books she had and she sent back like 4 texts going on and on about she wouldnt keepthem from and so on and so on. she has started to drink a lot again and ths may be the cause of some of this but idk. any advice on what i should do?? she is/was the only1 i could tell EVERYTHING to and now i have no 1. she was going thro a lot and so was i but it shouldnt have gotten this out of hand. idk if it is worth it or not it seems when we argue it is moreor less when she is drinking and idk if i want to deal with it anymore but like i said she was a close friend who was always there to talk to and help me with my kids sometimes....
1 person likes this
1 response
marie2052
@marie2052 (3691)
• United States
23 Apr 12
I was in a similar situation about 2 years ago. Only thing is if you had a disagreement with the neighbor you had a disagreement with ALL the neighbors cause she was the type to tell the world. While mine was not a situation like yours, from past experience with people that drink, they can take it to the next level. Seriously think about it. you said she drinks would you really want to leave your children with a neighbor like that? Find a new friend. Sometimes its the best thing to do. I don't miss any of the drama anymore on that side of the neighborhood. And I am not driving them around to go places cause they did not have a car. I was sucked in thinking I NEEDED a friend. I have friends across the street that if I really needed something they would help Otherwise, we just say hi and once in awhile talk. Sit down and figure out what you consider a friend. Then make a list of good and bad on your neighbor. You may be surprised what you should do whether you want to or not. Huggs to you and hope you make a decision best for you and your family.
crazzydolphin
@crazzydolphin (3636)
• United States
23 Apr 12
yes it seems that every time she drinks any thing is a WAY bigger deal than it needs to be. she doesnt drink when she would watch my kids (that i know of). i know she has a few times but not enough to really matter but yes i agree me and my husband have been talking about that for a while. most of the time when they were over there there was another adult in the house to that was sober. same with me i do no miss all the drama with her. and it is kind of nice for my cell not to be texted all day every day or my house phone to ring off the hook because it was her. i am able to get a lot more accomplished. i also do not miss all the driving that i did for her. the gas $ was nice because if i had enoug gas i could use it for anything but at the same time i can deal without the money compared to spending my life running her every where when she knows i have things i need to be doing. i dont really have any other friends in my neighborhood because it isnt the best neighborhood to be in but i think it is more peaceful without her in my life but my kids really miss talking to her and seeing her almost every day :( not only did she do all that i found out last night that she tols her 15 daughter "they are gettiing kicked out of here you will never be able to see them again". for 1 we havent talked in a little over a week so she has no clue what is going on and even if she did she didnt have to tell her like that. she thinks we gave up and we are moving but she never bothered to ask before she said something like that. there is no telling what she told every one else... i think i may do the list but i am pretty sure i will have more bad things than good lol. i think i have honesty decided that in mine and my families best intrest it would be better to just leave her alone and if she tries to talk to me again i think i will reject it. i mean she is only mad at me not my husband or my kids but she is making me look bad in place of all the things she did to me.... thank you for your comment and you advice :)