I don't feel like seeing anybody..

Philippines
April 23, 2012 11:25pm CST
Hello Lotters, I have been having this way and feeling for recent years, I thought it was just easy to brush it off. but some how, i don't feel like ready to see any one recently. last year i felt embarass for seeing my college friends and i am the only one who didn't bring any gift to that class mates. 2 years i attended that mylot conference but i felt the same feeling because i didn't share the expenses and failed to engage a conversation. Now, the tres marias during that mylot meet up wanted to see me or visit me at my house. I sure hope they don't take pics at my home because it's a huge mess (duh, it is). not that i don't want them, at some point i wanted to be visited. but the truth is am at my worst scenario these days, you can say am at my very low low thing, and i didn't want others to see like this. another thing is with out knowing my insecurity and selfishness started to rise and i can't stop it... I tried so hard to improve myself again, knowing others had more problems..but I'm too slow, and time rans faster than i ever imagined. Something is wrong with me and i know it...
2 people like this
14 responses
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
hi lk! i hope you already know that the "tres marias" are the very people who will judge you the least. as far as the 3 ladies are concerned... that is the truth. none of the three is a meanie. and i'm sure you won't be press-ganged to agree on the visit if you are not comfortable with it. when you're good and ready for the visit, that will be the time. no worries. cheer up. the 3 curvy ladies just miss you. it's been a long time since the mylot conference about 18 months ago and it must have been months also since the last skype call/chat. time... fortunately and unfortunately... can both be an ally and a foe. and it always passes... consistently without fault. hehe whatever it is you are feeling right now is a matter of perception. only you can say. and only you can do something about it. [i]but hey, i can sprout an extra ear, an extra shoulder or an extra hand for yah... let us know. or i could grow a tail and horn for yah too if needed. hmnnn not my usual get up. or we could just settle for my halo and wings. hehe this is more like me. lol [/i] cheers!
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39079)
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
myles dear Or we can just stay in one corner feeling like this waiting for LK to open his heart and mind....not literally huh
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
@ myles, maybe we can give him extra pounds too........... @ jai, Hope it will not take a hundred years cause can't wait that too long missing both of you
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
know what... perhaps the tres marias and the knight should venture in some profitable project that could be financially beneficial and can afford to take all four to guilt-free travel and food tripping. i'm open to ideas guys...
@jaiho2009 (39079)
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
dear LK, Well, well, well my dear brother. I understand what you are feeling- no need to explain. Besides- the "tres maria's" are like big sisters to you (except the curvy one-she's same your age) So, nothing to worry about these "tres maria's". There is nothing wrong with you (it's just your mindsetting)- but circumstances do. You need friends to talk with- and one thing more- you need friends who understand without explaining yourself.
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
hi j! hope you agree, i sorta mentioned in my response that the "tres marias" are the very people who would judge lk the least. and that the 3 ladies are not meanies. hehe just missing him though.
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39079)
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
myles dear :) Oh yeah, these tres marias don't need any explanation to understand him....they understand him even before he speak a single word
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
@ jai, Hope LK will realized it that he don't need to be somebody because we love him the way he is
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
hi LK, Does the youngest of tres marias bother you so much with her idea? Maybe she just wanted to see and have some fun with you because she is comfortable with a KNIGHT don't worry she won't mention this idea again until you are ready for everything. She just wished to share a plate of pasta and piece of cake with you together with the other curvy ladies . Everyone of us has the lowest point of their life only true ones can understand you just give them a chance. There was never been an issues about this sharing whatsoever don't think that way. happy mylotting
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
the middle of the tres marias agrees.
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello Bhabycatch, Hi! Well, it's not supposed to at all, maybe something really hit me at this point. or it's just one of those negative reactions which has always been my bad habit lately. I do love pasta and i wish i can eat it again, I usually eat pasta every 5 times a YEAR. i had the same reaction when our friend invited us for the mylot confe. but i guess i can get over it. thank you for your understanding.
• Singapore
25 Apr 12
Hi LetranKnight, You sound a little depressed. I know the feeling too well. A couple of years back, I had some major problems hanging over my head and I didn't feel like seeing anybody. My girl was very young at that time. Since I kept her indoors most of the time, her social interactions were poor and she could hardly talk. At one point, I realised that I was not doing justice to her. I started out by visiting my closest relatives and then I brought her to visit my friends. We went on outings together. Make-up does wonders to hide the insecurity in me. My lack of confidence slowly dissipated as I knew that I had the support and encouragement of the people around me, should anything bad were to happen. It was difficult to pick myself up in the beginning. Stepping out of the house was terrifying, what more to meet people and talk to them. But I knew I had to move on, even with my problems unresolved then. A turning point must happen. Mine arrived when I left my problems with God. Whatever the turnout of my problem, I will accept because I know He has many things in store for me. Are you having any problems right now, Letran?
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello Sydney, Thank you for understanding the feeling, I am kinda depressed lately and I just can't believe it. I don't want this problem hanging over my head but probably i can't take it anymore and i need to let it out.yeah i didn't like or want to leave the house either but it leaves me no choice sometimes when going out isn't my mood at all. maybe I should leave my problems with GOD too. which I've been seriously lacking in faith for months. Have a nice day
@CarlHalling (3629)
• United Kingdom
24 Apr 12
You are being way too hard on yourself, and judging from your message, I don't see you as selfish. If you were selfish, you'd not feel bad about your situation. Also, if I might comfort you...many people suffer from depression, mild and severe, as well as social avoidance and other social issues. My advice would be...well first and foremost, realise you are not alone; many suffer alongside you, including me: I feel I am a sufferer from mild depression, including anxiety and social anxiety issues. I also feel you should speak to your doctor about it; and they can help you to overcome your insecurities about seeing people. I wish you luck.
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello Carlhalling, Thank you for this advice, when i wrote this discussion i really thought and felt alone with the situation i have. Right now, am not that depressed, probably because i couldn't live a life the way i wanted to. I never understand why it had to happen but it did and i feel bad about it to boot. again, i appreciate it and have a nice day.
@savypat (20248)
• United States
24 Apr 12
This sounds like depression to me. You may need some outside help with this. I suffered from this for many years and wasted that period of my life. I tried treatment which helped alittle but in the end I just seemed to outgrow it. Spiritural training did the most for me. I used Reiki which is what presented it's self to me. A teacher arrived and I took advantage of that training. But you must open your eyes and see what is available for you. Blessings
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello Savypat, Indeed it is depression and i can't help it now a days. i don't know what kind of out side help but I've been wanting to go with a psychiatrist these days i dunno. Maybe in my situation I have been closing a bit too much for comfort but now i realized those mistakes. thank you and have a nice day.
• United States
24 Apr 12
You might be just a little depressed. Like me. Why don't you eat your favorite icecream to cheer you up? Then look at what positive sides of you instead of burying yourself in solitude. Get rid of the negas in your life dear. You can clean up the clutter of the house but still feel like its a mess. I guess that would mean its the clutter and the mess inside your head you need to clear up. WHen the glow is within you, it will show on the outside. And getting up everymorning will not be so tough. Most important thing. Smile and thank God that you are still there to savor life. And Im happy, that I get to read and respond to you.
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello gazinglady That's a great Idea, i haven't really been eating icecream in weeks not to mention is SUMMER HEAT OUT HERE. I do have been doing some house chores to get myself out of this loneliness and depression of feeling. I will thank GOD in the coming week ends, thank you for your respond..
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
You have to get over with those negative feelings or else it will eat you. I admit i sometimes feel that way but i always try my best to get rid of that feeling. Oh, sometiems i feel so down and lonely. My self-esteem isn't that huge. Well, i hope you do feel better now. Take care!
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello Tess_Quinain, I know but some how there are times that I really can't help it and i don't know why. I am glad though that not all of us have good self esteem, but i wonder, how can you have low self esteem when you're pretty as a celebrity. but thanks for dropping by i would take your work for it
@jazel_juan (15767)
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
we all hit our lowpoints Letran, i had my fair share of that. There were times when you just want to be alone and you do not want others to see you as you think you are a mess aside from your house being a mess, you yourself aint yourself.. but you see, it might do you good to be with people with good vibes, they might share those good vibes, attract it to yourself and you will find yourself feeling good again and it might help you get back to your track. I have been practicing that - law of attraction thing, i am thinking of positive things, not thinking of the bad ones, i know they are there and they exists yet i am thinking of the good things so the good things will come instead of the bad, power of the mind they say..so let us do it..
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello Jazel, Yeah we all hit our low points and hard to believe that such low points of my life but i guess it's not too late. I don't know, am more into a negative side of the magnet. I have been doing and thinking good things that i have in my life though.thank you for this good advice. have anice day to you.
• United States
24 Apr 12
You sound depressed and that is not good. This will be hard for you as long as you feel like this. if you don't have energy to clean up and do other stuff try to remove yourself from them and come back later. This could be handled with a doctors help.
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello giftandbags, It was never good in the first place. thank you for your concern, we really don't have a kind of that doctor. but right now am doing fine again
@bing28 (3800)
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
There's nothing wrong with you Letran. I felt the same way when I'm not prepared of receiving visitors. All I want is to be presentable when I came to see friends or visitors. If I think am not comfortable of seeing them at home I would just see them in a mall or in a park or reschedule them for a date I think am already prepared.
• Philippines
27 Apr 12
Hello bing28, am glad of you telling that there's nothing wrong with me.I would probably go to my brother's house tomorrow because he needs my help on something, which is not bad, it helps me to do something else i think it's a more productive day to do i think. have a nice day
• Philippines
24 Apr 12
Whatever you problem is, don't dwell on it too much. Avoid negative feelings cause that makes you feel more and more problematic. Don't take life too seriously. Live life like with no problems. Make complicated things simple. Be happy and smile everyday.
• Philippines
29 Apr 12
Hello jvincent, Don't worry i will try my best not to dwell on it, besides it's probably just one of those down moments that doesn't stay long. well, i chose to forget about that the other night because i had tons of stuff to work on. thanks i will do my best to smile around.
@SIMPLYD (74944)
• Philippines
24 May 12
So why are you that way, Letran? Have you analyzed the problem behind it? Well, the fact that you went to Mylot conference is already an evidence that you can be sociable too. It's just that , you feel as if others would belittle you just becuase you didn't share in the expense. They are not like that Letran. All they want is to see one another. I guess someone with a bigger pocket could have doled out a bigger amount to share in the expense. So maybe as a starter , you have to fight that depression. Always have an exercise in the morning so your adrenaline could be upped, thus it will shoo away any depressive feeling. As too being too slow, well it's up to you to combat that too. Life is what you make it. So, stay positive , Letran.
@salam1 (1475)
• Malaysia
17 May 12
Try homeopathy remedy, I took kali phos (it is sold in many online stores like amazon and very cheap), it helps..