the soft heart of my Tyrant Mother

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When i was a kid i cant really understand on how my Mother think. I always thought that maybe she just don't like me to enjoy my life as a kid. I always compare her in my mind to the mother of our neighbor. I envy them because they are free to play in the road and most specially to be in the river.Sometimes i felt that shes the reason of some of my weakness, that shes the reason why i don't know how to swim because she forbid us from going to the river, not until when i reach my maturity that i fully understand her. The tyranny that i have perceived before was only the care she have for us.As a kid we sometimes misunderstood the acts of our mother but if we just carefully analyze it we will find out that behind the tyranny is a soft heart... thank you mama