how do you choose your friends?

@annierose (17966)
Philippines
April 30, 2012 10:19pm CST
I have so many acquaintances but only few good friends. I am a quiet person that is why I think that is one reason I don't have many friends. How do you choose your friends? I have realized that sometimes it is necessary to limit or eliminate my contact with certain individuals who bring me more misery than peace and do not reflect or allow me to be the person that I am truly or aspire to be. Instead, I surround myself with positive thinkers who are not always creating drama. I choose people who make my day brighter simply by being around them. I want those people whom I admire; I am proud to know; and who support, motivate and encourage me to grow. How about you?
3 people like this
11 responses
@vaishnavc (556)
• India
1 May 12
Well everyone one wants friends like that,I want people who are nice and who will stand beside me to be my friends.What i meant from stand by me is that.If/When i make a mistake,they shouldn't accuse me with the others.Instead support me then/when i need it.And then to tell me what mistakes that i have done.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
5 May 12
I also want the same and I think everybody does too. I love honest friends. My close friends do not always agree with me. They tell me things even they know I will be hurt. We have some arguments and some fights sometimes but it doesn't last long. Since we are already professionals, we accept our mistakes and we thank each other that we don't have to pretend to say that I like something in someone even the truth is we do not really appreciate it.
• India
5 May 12
Hey annie.I guess i guess you are right. Happy mylotting.
• India
1 May 12
Real friends are those mirrors which reflect our mistakes and the potive feature inside. He should be the one who should be the real one to tell the things in an oppen manner. He should be the who should be the one to realize how deep i love him. I used to select those ones who accept those things and put them in their life.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Real friends will be honest even they know that we will be hurt. They are the one who will tell us our mistakes but then won't judge us. Instead, they will lend a hand for us to correct our mistakes and be a better person. They are also the one who will never left us no matter what.
• India
2 May 12
So, this is the reason why I love them and this is the reason why I locked them inside my heart. Keep In touch!
@celticeagle (118520)
• Boise, Idaho
1 May 12
I don't think we really choose our friends. I think we are around people, come into contact with people that we just jive with. And perhaps they feel the same way. We mesh and start spending time. Friendship comes out of this. I just don't feel like I 'choose' my friends.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
I do not reject people if they want to make friends with me. However, I am not a person who is sociable. I am always by myself. If I do not know something, that is the time I ask for a help of people around me. There are times that those people who help me become my friends. Well, when it comes to the people who I always go along with, I am choosy. I want to be with the one I am comfortable with and I am happy with.
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (118520)
• Boise, Idaho
1 May 12
I find that when I have to be in a group there may be someone I gravitate to and/or feel comfortable with. That person may become a friend. I am choosy too but occasionally this does happen.
@marguicha (97001)
• Chile
1 May 12
I don´t think that I have chosen my friends but rather that we have chosen each other. nd in evver instance there´s afirst moment of talking, of deciding we are interested in simialr things that we would like to talk about agian. Then comes the join each other for a cup of coffee or another such an activity. Frienship is a process and it come with time. Sometimes friends let us down and we must stop it. I like positive thinkers, but I´m aware that all of us have our moments of pain and sorrow so we must be willing to help out if we are real friends.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
There are also times that I think negatively. When I was studying in my MA degree, I told me friend that studying in MA is very difficult and I want to stop. She told me not to stop. She told me that I should study harder and aim to graduate with my MA. She was angry with me that time that I was very negative with myself. She taught me a lesson and that is to look at the brighter side of life and do not quit no matter how hard it is.
@marguicha (97001)
• Chile
8 May 12
She was a true friend because she was there for you when you needed her. And she loved you enough as to scold you. I hope you did finish your degree.
• United States
1 May 12
I agree with you totally. I do not like being around people who make me miserable. I have drifted away from people who have made me miserable. I now stay around people who are positive or who I have a good time with. I am also a quiet person.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
5 May 12
Thanks for the response awesomeguy. I think that people likes to go along with people like them too. There might be some who still goes with people who are not like them but I guess it is not healthy. For example, some poor people wants to get along with the rich ones despite the fact that they cannot do the things that those rich people do. What is worst is that, when they make lies just for the rich ones to believe that he or she is rich too.
@barehugs (8986)
• Canada
1 May 12
Whatever you do, Do not believe that having friends is the end-all and the be-all! As a senior, and although I have many acquaintances whom I love dearly I have never had a close friend, because I never wanted one. I've been married to the same woman for almost 60 years, so its not as if I could not have a friend if I so desired. A person without friends has many advantages, such as the ability to choose your own course of action and thought. You are able to keep secrets, and to make up your mind quickly and definitely! As Polonius said: "This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. Farewell, my blessing season this in thee!"
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
5 May 12
thank you for the response. I would love to have some close friends where I can confide my thoughts and feelings. There are times that I just keep things to myself but I feel better once I share things to my close friends. Happy mylotting!
• Philippines
1 May 12
I am not very choosy when it comes to friends. Most of my friends, I didn't really choose them. Before I knew it, we were already friends. I consider myself quite a friendly person so maybe that is one reason why people also like being friends with me. If ever there are people who intimidate me, then I just deal with them as professionally as I can. And of course, it is really a good idea to keep away from friends who may not be a good influence.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
5 May 12
Sometimes, just by observing some persons, I already make a decision not to make friends with them but it doesn't mean that I will ignore them once they want to make friends with me. It is just because I not want to be close to certain people because I am not like them. For example, I know that a certain group of persons love to spend much and I know I cannot afford it, so I just avoid those kind of people. I just want to be who I am and I just choose to go along with those people who are also like me.
1 May 12
It is important to wisely choose the people you surround yourself with. I prefer people who are genuine, honest and positive about life. Finding a good friend is like finding a jewel and once you find one, treasure the friendship and try to make it work.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
5 May 12
Finding a true friend is like finding a needle in the haystack. It is very difficult, that is why once we met one, we should take care of them. As for me, I consider my friends as my guardian angels. I have few guardian angels but I am happy. I don't need to have many but then are fake. Few is much better, few but true to you.
@Iynna12 (67)
1 May 12
I do not like hving too many friends . It makes me feel confused. i have to make notes on themes i have spoekn to the first one then to the second. I have to have a notepad. it becomes too much lfe-enduring.It's better to have a chat on my lot site where you can see the words written ,the notes given in order by evry nidividual. Mylot is the best chat program which does not require memory from your side. You can reread other people thoughts again and again.It's very easy. i am bad at memory and this site helps me gather myself together.I think i do not need even the one friend that i meet with occasionally or rarely from time to time. It happens very often that we do not have what to talk about.She repeats the same sentences and talks about the same events. I think i will gve her the opportunity to find a future husband and leave her on her own.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
It seems you prefer to be alone rather than with a group of people. I am somewhat like that too. I do not like persons with loud voices that keeps on screaming. I'd rather choose to be alone than mingle with people that are so noisy. That is the reason, many people think of me that I am very serious. I have very few friends who know me enough. I love them. We sometimes get noisy too. I love being with them as with them I can be who I am.
@hgwyneth (120)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Hi, I too have few but genuine friends. During my elementary days, I got one rare friend. Till now we're friends. During high school, I've got lots of them but only few are in my contact since we're from different provinces. During my college days, I've won also one from the school and till now we are communicating. What I've treasured the most are my friends from the church. It's over ten years already since we established friendship. We're in different places now but never in our memory that we forgot each other. They are older than I am. We have 4-6 years age gap however, they're my genuine friends. They are there to support me ever since. They were there extending some peso to add to my allowance. Giving me clothing, shelter but most of all love. I love them. I must say its really good to befriend those nice people who will bring you to the right path not those friends who'll just befriend you only to have gimmicks. We do also have gimmicks and those are all wholesome. Just going to the beach overnight, enjoying the nature, singing together and the like. I love the memories. I'll forever keep them. Choose your friend. As what the saying goes, "Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are."
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Thank you for the wonderful response. We have to choose carefully the people who we are bonding with. That is what I am also telling my students. They should choose the friends that won't put them in harm.We all have the power to choose. We can be with bad influence or good influence kind of friends. It is all in our hands to choose wisely.
@WakeUpKitty (8706)
• Netherlands
1 May 12
You don't choose friends. They come on your path and are strangers first or acquintances. Time will show if they are a friend (according to how you measure it) or not. Nobody needs lots of true friends, one can live too and feel happy with many acquintances (which is what most people have although they call them friends). With them you can talk, go out, share, laugh etc too. I wonder why you choose people.. you walk around the street and say: you make me happy so from now on you are my friend????? Also a (friendship) relationship is not equal (which it should be) if you only want friends you can admire and who you are proud to know! Sounds to me you don't know what true friendship really means. I also wonder what you invest in your relationship with them.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Well, I want a friend who can carry me to good things in life. There are different kinds of people in this world. There are people who don't know anything but to complain about themselves, about their surroundings, about their life, about everything--and I do not want to mingle much with those kind of people as I can be like that too. There are also kind of people who are very proud of themselves and so judgmental and I hate those kind too. So, whenever I found out that there is some attitude that I do not like, I just stay away.
@viji_v2 (727)
• India
1 May 12
The most simple way to find the right friend is whom cares for us will be our friend for long period. If we start to reciprocate the same love and friendship for them, everyday the bond becomes stronger.
@annierose (17966)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Yes, friendships are built once an act of kindness has been reciprocated with another act of kindness. That is true.