What will you do when you find out that your husband is...?

Philippines
June 11, 2012 10:35pm CST
Hi everyone. I'm having a difficulty right now.. I just found out a day before my birthday that my husband is living together with his mistress. I don't know what to do. I want to beat them into pieces but I am trying my best to stay calm. I hate them. How I wish they could just die.
2 people like this
14 responses
@TrvlArrngr (4057)
• United States
12 Jun 12
Divorce him and take all he has - the stupid guy!!! I just don't understand people that cheat. Just end the first relationship before starting another.
1 person likes this
• Lenox, Georgia
12 Jun 12
I am so sorry sweetie that your going through that. Wow, that must be really tough. =( I will be praying for you but in the mean time, try to distract your thoughts with other things. Do things for yourself that you couldn't do before. Try to think of other things and not what is happening. When I am sad I watch movies, I cry over other people's lives instead of my own. It makes me feel better. I also like listening to music, it helps sometimes. I hope you will be okay and find real love somewhere else when you are ready. He was no good for you if he could do that to you. No one should be treated that way, you deserve so much better! Your worth more than him anyway...
1 person likes this
@Sanitary (3969)
• Singapore
12 Jun 12
Like you mentioned, he's your husband. If he's been unfaithful to you, leave him. Do not leave yourself more trouble if you make concession for him. Since he can betray you once, he's likely to do it again. Do stay calm, do not confront him if you are sure that woman is his mistress. Do something that hurt him emotionally, not physically. Take a pick on their ego and pride, and that's the best way to punish man for their infidelity.
1 person likes this
@choybel (5059)
• Philippines
12 Jun 12
That is just so sad, having to find out something like that especially right before your birthday. I hope you could get some help with staying calm and focus. I know it is hard, seeing how my father went through something like this. It almost ruined him and our entire family. Please stay strong for yourself and maybe seek solace with friends, family and God.
1 person likes this
@EMbakes (1152)
• Philippines
6 Sep 16
It's obvious that he's no longer in love and worst, doesn't respect you anymore. The only thing you can do is to leave him. It's going to be his lost anyway. Know your self worth.
@jsae29 (1122)
• Philippines
21 Jun 12
If I were you, I'll probably be in jail by now. I would kill them both with my bare hands and chop their body into pieces. Gruesome...right!?!? Just kiddin'! I'm not that violent. I will definitely gather evidence and then I will confront my husband about it. Since he's living already with his mistress then it simply means he's serious about her. So no matter how painful it is, I will just accept the fact that our relationship is over. But not my life!!! There's a saying "Don't get MAD. Get EVERYTHING!", so as the legal wife, get everything and anything that you can get from your husband. Leave him with his underpants!!!
@dansazz (1059)
• United States
14 Jun 12
Those are very bad thoughts to have towards people. If he is a cheater then you're better off without him anyway.
@Paper_Doll (2375)
• Philippines
14 Jun 12
I understand how you feel. Being betrayed by someone whom you trust with all your heart is really hard. You should give yourself time to think things over. As of the moment, your emotions will greatly affect your decision so it would be better if you could just wait for a while before doing so. If you think that you're already ready to talk about it, then seek for help/advice from professionals or elderly. You have the options to choose from and it would be really up to you if you will put an end to your marriage or if there's a possibility for reconciliation.
• Philippines
13 Jun 12
From your siutuation Its very painful but despite the hurt stay calm. Their relationship wont stay long. Although they were at the happiness of their relationship sooner bad karma will happen to them. Pray everything to our creator for he will provide you peace in mind. Just wait for the right time and stay calm. Stay quiet dont be stubborn just do your thing.
@sql_cell (1429)
• Indonesia
13 Jun 12
I really understand your feelings. You must find out why your husband do that? If you are not satisfied with the answers given, and you are not satisfied, you can make decisions that you think is good. But, I suggest you to talk with your husband, and say what you feel. And you need to talk, the continuation of your household.
@kukueye (1761)
• Malaysia
12 Jun 12
Be calm and seek legal advice. - Claim what is yours.
wow , it hard to said wat to do. I guess asking him to choose between your and her is the usually response, if not then time to divorce and ask lawyer to fight for your right. MAde sure u got ample proff to show the judge for adultery and such claim more money and allowance for yourself.This is difficult time, gather those who are with u against your cheating spouse.
• India
12 Jun 12
Hello my friend raynejasper Ji, Keeping calm would benifit you, but at the same time, find out, where did you lack and Mistress went ahead to please your hubby. Our response should always be plaesinhg. Try to sity on yuoiur huby's place and find oiut some draw-backs and recover them, begfore relationship is tarnished and you are totally deprived of your real rights. May God bless You and have a great
@Bluedoll (17039)
• Canada
12 Jun 12
You are going through some serious trials here. Your anger is justified. Take a breath. Do something constructive, decisive. You have choices. You can accept this situation. You can choose to react to it. You can forgive. You can demand a change on conditions. You can ask for separation. You can do as what has been done to you. You have many choices. Choose what is best for you.
@ybong007 (6658)
• Philippines
12 Jun 12
If you kill them then you'll be in prison. If you have evidence, go to the cops and have them arrested. Under Philippine law, concubinage if proven, has a maximum penalty of six years.