Fat people have rights too

United States
June 22, 2012 7:23pm CST
Okay Mylot, I am about to go on one of my rants. I am tired of people discriminating on fat people. I can't buy clothes at a normal store, I can't ride on any rides at the amusement park, and I have to pay double when I want to fly on a plane. I acknowledge that my weight hinders me from enjoying some things, but no one has the right to call me an unfit parent, because I weigh over 300 pounds. I just read online about a man who is fighting for custody of his kids after the authorities deemed him an unfit parent. One of the reasons behind this decision is because the man weighs 360 lbs, and doctors say he lacks the mobility to keep up with an active child. I have seen 70 year old grand parents babysitting children, I have seen parents on wheel chairs, a parent who loves their children and will work hard to provide for those children does not deserve to lose them, because society has decided to wage war on obesity. I would like to know your thoughts people, and I warn you I will defend my position vehemently so if you have a problem with fat people, don't expect me to back down.
5 people like this
24 responses
• Singapore
23 Jun 12
I'm ok with fat people who don't want to be compared to others, or forced to be like others. I mean, if they want to live their lives that way, then let them be, just that they'll eventually have to face the consequences of having this lifestyle and health. What I don't like are fat people who try to force their "fat" lifestyle, diets etc onto others, even if the other person/people are their own children or relatives. It's a personal preference for a person to want to be fat, but it does not mean he or she has the rights to force this preference onto others. Just like there are fat people who don't like to become slim, there are also normal and healthy people who don't like to become fat. In short, you need to respect people's preferences if you want them to respect your preferences. As for discrimination by public (and maybe authorities), if you want to change their opinions about fat people, and treat them fairly, I can only "Good luck with trying that!" (with the sarcastic tone that is). Thing is, many people's mindset is "overweight = unhealthy/unsightly/....(every negative trait a person can have)" or somewhere along this line, and they might not be so willing to back down just because someone argues with them about this. I know this stings, but you have to face it. Reality hurts. At the end of the day, I can only think of two options that a fat person can take: 1) Remain fat, have poor health (and spending tons of money trying to maintain a semi-decent health), get discriminated, get shortchanged/ripped off(I'm sure you understand this better than me) and a whole bunch of problems and misery 2) Improve your diet, exercise, get healthy and say goodbye to all this misery As I have said from the start, it's entirely your own choice to make, whether you want to remain fat or do something to improve the situation. Just remember, you have to be prepared to face the consequences for the choice you make. Good luck in your life (no sarcasm this time) P.S. I figured it'll be better to put my response this way since there isn't really a need to convince anyone, as I intended to just put my opinions after all. Some things I mentioned might sound really harsh, but then that is what reality is about, so nothing personal here.
1 person likes this
@oldchem1 (8144)
23 Jun 12
It strikes me that you have never had a problem with your weight or eating. I would ask you to read my response to this discussion further up the page regarding your comments, especially "your own choice to make, whether you want to remain fat or do something to improve the situation." Things are not always as cut and dried as you may think!
• United States
23 Jun 12
People are entitled to their opinions, but when some one tries to impose on my lifestyle, they better be ready to pay the consequences. Mainly a 300 lb kick to the head.
• Singapore
23 Jun 12
A kick? I thought you were going to say a body slam, cos that's more powerful and you could totally squash the other fellow flat. Anyone I think there is no point in being angry with those who impose on your lifestyle, cos there are just too many of such people out there, its just a waste of energy dealing with them. Might as well focus your energy in doing something you like.
@PageTurner (2827)
• United States
23 Jun 12
Hello PhillyDreamer Being fat has nothing to do with ones' ability to parent. The physical size of a parent has nothing to do with the quality of parenting. It is just wrong that this would even be brought up. I hope that the man is able to secure council and sue the socks off the people treating him this way. What a shame.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
In his case he also has a history of violent behavior, but for doctors to deem him an unfit parent is ridiculous.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
I can see how violent behavior would be a concern in raising children. However, holding someone's weight against them is simply discrimination.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I will be observing this closely, because the legal implications for such a case could effect a lot of people like me.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
I think there's two kinds of fat people: a) active, healthy people that are larger for other reasons (like height and muscle mass) that being larger is more normal-looking or b) sloppy fat people, who just act as if they can eat and be lazy about life. You strike me as being part of the first group. Who is telling you that you aren't a good parent because of your size? That's absurd!
• United States
23 Jun 12
No this all started with an article I read on Yahoo. The courts seem to be using a mans weight as a reason to deny him custody to his children. A precedent like that could effect all people.
23 Jun 12
Definitely, fat people like you have the rights to. I think it' not right to deprive a parent from the custody of his child only because he weighs more. You are right some old people still could take care of their kids so why should a fat person couldn't do that? Being fat is always not the fault of an individual and so it is not enough to discriminate someone because he is fat. However if you could do something to lessen your weight at your own will and not because it is what other people are saying, then do so. It's for your own health.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
I've been to the doctors plenty of times, the only trouble I've had because of my weight was sleep apnea, and bad knees. My cholesterol is healthy, blood pressure normal, and sugar levels are where they are supposed to be. I'm healthier than some people who weigh far less than me.
• Jacksonville, Florida
23 Jun 12
I think ANY kind of judgement is wrong. Some people are heavier, some are too thin and some are of different religion, etc... No one should put judgements on anyone else. Besides the fact that the way the doctors judge obesity is crazy anyway. Let me explain. The doctor told me that my children are OBESE!! Ok, my kids are in my profile pictures, you tell me if you think they are overweight. I bet you and half the world would say no way! My children are short for their age yes but overweight? NO. I dont think being on the heavier side makes anyone a bad parent. Now, I do think the parents that are overweight and let their children become that way are wrong! That I will say, the children do not deserve to be overweight just because the parents are... There are plenty of things that hinder someone being a good parent but being overweight is NOT one of them!
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
The fact is, children are just bigger in general. I have a 10 year old cousin who is over 6 feet tall and well over 300 lbs. His father was a 7 footer and he will probably be just as big too. My two oldest sons have out grown me. The fact is that the old standards for measuring people cant be used in todays society. Many people are large.
1 person likes this
• India
23 Jun 12
Hey phillyDreamer, Don't get pained by yourself. It is your life and and it is your freedom to own what you feel. If you need to stay fat then keep going with it. Never hear others harsh words or funny questions just leave it and enjoy your life at your best. A fat heavy man has certain limitations as you mentioned to get rid from them it is better to reduce it so that you can save the travelling bills on the plane.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
I would much rather make the decision to lose weight for my own reasons. If I decide to travel. I'd much rather pay for the second seat, just to be comfortable.
• Indonesia
23 Jun 12
yeah some how that was right, what ever they was fat, they still humans to, what the problem is just because they was Fat, and make them heavier than slimer people, and they can spend more space than a normal.
1 person likes this
@else22 (4319)
• India
23 Jun 12
I have no problem with you,Dreamer.You are fat and you weigh 300lbs.So what? The only thing that makes me concerned is your vulnerability to diabetes and heart related problems.That's all.I have many fat persons as my friends and I am proud to have them as my friends for they are so sweet and cooperative.I don't know whether I am right,but,I think,all sweet persons are like that- sweet,friendly and cooperative.
@else22 (4319)
• India
23 Jun 12
I pray you live longer and quite fit and healthy.This is my earnest prayer to God.And this is the only thing that I would like to say.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I believe God will take me when he needs me for a greater purpose. Dying is not a punishment, it is a reward for a life well lived.
@wolveren (1569)
• Cebu, Philippines
23 Jun 12
I totally agree dude. It's sick. To me it doesn't matter if your old, fat or thin, or even a bit disabled. They should give people the chance to prove their worth and not just take their rights from under them. This really pissed me off. Now who's leg do I have to break?
• United States
23 Jun 12
Well right now its in Canada, but I tell you if a politician tries to bring that nonsense to this country, I will personally organize every fat person to jump up and down, till a building falls on top of his head. There are two things you don't take away from fat people, their food and their children.
@wolveren (1569)
• Cebu, Philippines
23 Jun 12
Yup, and it really doesn't matter if one is fat or not. Everyone should be given the chance to prove themselves. Out here parents are left alone to take care of their kids, even if they are over the edge. Besides our social welfare here is crap anyway. lol.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I think in cases of abuse or neglect a parent should lose rights, but the government would really have to prove the child has suffered at the hands of a parent.
@mikyung (2234)
• Philippines
23 Jun 12
Hi PhillyDreamer! Even without reading this discussion. Just the Header or the Title - My answer is an absolute - "I agree" with you. Every one of us here have equal rights and privileges. I weigh 175 pounds and I have no problem with anyone especially people with that kind. If ever I'll be in that position, I will feel the same way too. "Respect begets respect" is the thing here.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I believe a person will change his life style when he has the right motivation to do so. People trying to force a person to lose weight is not the right motivation, in fact I would refuse to lose weight on principle.
@mikyung (2234)
• Philippines
23 Jun 12
You are right, it's always on the initiative of the person rather doing something against his or her will. It's like Mom calling you to sleep early but you cannot sleep yet because you are not yet sleepy.
• United States
23 Jun 12
My parents don't even try to tell me what to do any more, and I will not have a doctor or a government official trying to act like my parent.
• United States
23 Jun 12
No one has the right to call you an unfit parent, true. However, your weight does pose a problem on plane and amusement park rides, where weight of the persons climbing aboard effects how the plane or ride functions. They don't do it just to be mean, a plane carrying extra weight has to burn extra fuel and the typical amusement park car is not built to accommodate larger people. As for clothes not being available at a normal store, they're just mean to everybody! lol Lots of people can't find their right size at a department store. My sister has to take in everything she buys because size zero really isn't stocked at Walmart. Stores cater to the average person, and unfortunately most of us aren't actually average. I had not heard of anyone getting their kids taken away because of their weight before, and I agree that it is hardly fair considering the number of disabled and older parents considered fit to raise their children despite whatever obstacles they might face.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I don't even try at the amusement park anymore. I almost killed myself on a water slide when i was 250lbs, and Ive learned my lesson. Planes I look at it like this, if the seat wont fit around my butt I have no choice but to get an extra seat. But I'll tell you this, that plane better not try to seat another person there. Its my seat.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 12
lol, of course they'd better not! Have they tried that in the past, putting someone in your extra seat?
• United States
24 Jun 12
Haven't flown since I was smaller. LOL. I'm just saying, it better not happen. I might just buy the whole row so I can laydown. LOL
1 person likes this
@loonys (418)
23 Jun 12
You are very good looking guy . If I was with you I would remind you everyday that you need to loose weight. Its not healthy and it does kill people. Just change a bit your life style.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I am quite happy at the size I am. I refuse to lose weight because someone thinks that's what I am supposed to do. My weight does not make me an unfit parent. I love my kids unconditionally, and I would die before I let any harm come to them.
1 person likes this
@loonys (418)
23 Jun 12
Nonsense. Being happy has nothing to do with weight. Fat people are at risk of lots of health issues. Your kids are little what do they know and by the time they will grow its normal to loose their old papa. Does your wife like you fat?
• United States
23 Jun 12
She is quite happy with me. I really don't care about dying early, especially if I have to live in a world where people think they can impose their will on me. We live in a world where people murder for a $1. I think I'll die at the hands of a murderer before my weight does me in, so really whats the point of trying to live according to someone else's standards. The fact is I have a family that loves me, I have the ability to create, and I am doing my part in shaping the world by teaching my children right from wrong, and showing them how to forge their own destiny. I am happy and I refuse to believe losing weight is going to make me any more content with life. We all will die, when God calls for you, you will die. It does not matter if you weight a hundred lbs or 500 lbs.
2 people like this
@artemeis (4017)
• China
24 Jun 12
I just want to ask if you are agreeable that obesity itself is unhealthy and as such is considered a health hazard where the individual is more likely to contract heart attacks, hypertension and diabetes. I don't think the case that you mention is actually one which is discriminating the obese parent but somewhat factual which if he still does not want to do anything to his current situation, there is a chance that he might not even be able to see his child reach adulthood or in some extreme circumstance reach independence. Also, I am guessing that he might have some potentially existing medical condition where it was being taken into consideration. As for me, I really do not have anything against fat people but I would not support their indifference where they would feel comfortable and to a certain extent alright. I think you should not feel angry but take it from another perspective to motivate you to do something to your condition which is actually beneficial in the long run. I am sure you are aware that the medical cost for the conditions I had mentioned are not getting lower with times and besides the cost, I am sure the road to recovery can be long and painful. I am sure when you suffer the torments of illness, your love ones will suffer with you as well. Like you had mentioned, even traveling could be costly to the pocket where I would actually consider unnecessary. The money could have been better spent on a more luxurious accommodation or shopping. What do you think? Let me encourage you to look the other way and do something about the weight where I am sure will be more beneficial than anything else.
• United States
24 Jun 12
Would you be okay with someone forcing you too gain weight or risk losing your kids? I will concede nothing on this argument. Obesity being unhealthy is an opinion. You can give all the evidence in the world, but I've seen skinny people die of hypertension, diabetes, and cancer. Does that mean its unhealthy to be skinny? If you want to motivate someone to lose weight. Motivate yourself, and leave good people alone. I'm sick of all these fitness experts trying to force everyone into their lifestyle. I swear these people are worse then religious fanatics.
@artemeis (4017)
• China
24 Jun 12
Well, have it your way because as I had said before, I do not think the judge's decision was merely based on the fact that the parent is simply obese. It may happen in China but not in your well established country where the decision is being supported by certain medical conditions the father in question might have. Besides, I do not think there will be any success in overturning the judgement unless the father could prove that he has a clean bill as far as his health is concern. Also, obesity being unhealthy is never an opinion because my uncle had every illness I had mentioned when he retired from active service and lost control with his weight. He left his family at the age of 52 while his children were still schooling. Not forgetting, some of my overweight peers who are presently struggling with their medical condition and the sufferings their conditions are bringing to their families. I concede that skinny people do die of the conditions you and I had mentioned but lets be objective with it by going through the facts, statistics and even likelihood. You may want to stand on your side of the fence and no one can force you to budge. But, I hope that none of the eventful "friends" will come a visit you. Sometimes, one will never know the pain of a needle p.r.i.c.k until one experiences it.
• Philippines
23 Jun 12
I do agree with you. Fat people do have rights. And I meant EVERY human being has rights, no matter how big or small. We admit that people do discriminate, humans do discriminate. But I think that the custody was just going too far. It doesn't matter if you're fat or not. What matter is that you could manage in supporting your children, your kids. It doesn't matter if your ugly or not. What matters is that you love your child and will do anything just to keep them happy. Unfit parenting isn't supposed to refer to people who has a lot of pounds in them but to people who beat their children black and blue, people who abuse kids. THAT's what unfit parent is about. I feel furious just hearing that others are taking rights away from people who even deserve them. They should be given a good shake in the head
• United States
23 Jun 12
Those people will be cursed with large children, so they will learn in time.
• Philippines
24 Jun 12
Yeah, they will really learn in time how wrong they did the others they've accused as unfit. Though i'm sure that would be very soon.
@TrvlArrngr (4058)
• United States
23 Jun 12
That is uncalled for - you are right. So many handicapped parents would also lose their rights too. Who can say that obese people are any less capable than a blind person, or paralyzed person in a wheelchair. What about mental illness - they are hard to see or diagnose. This opens the door to so much discrimination. I am upset by this. I hope they overturn that verdict.
• United States
23 Jun 12
It remains to be see if that argument will be used, but I'll be keeping a close eye on this one.
@cher913 (25891)
• Canada
23 Jun 12
good for you for standing up for your rights. the thing is, if you don't no one else will. did you see the video on the woman who was taunted by 13 year olds because she was overweight? she was a bus monitor and the kid videoed it and it went viral. i saw the father on tv last night saying that apology was enough and that the apology should end everything. if i was that lady, i would have pressed charges! i hope these boys get punished some how.
• United States
23 Jun 12
I think when we deal with children we have to understand children do stupid things. This lady probably has a lot of love for those kids, and I admire the patience she displayed. They were trying to goad her into a violent reaction and the plan back fired. As far as the father who thinks an apology is enough, he will learn his lesson when his child is behind bars due to his inability to be a good parent.
@maximax8 (28256)
• United Kingdom
23 Jun 12
It would be boring if everyone was the same size and weight. My dog's groomer is a very overweight person but she is fit and healthy. She has a lovely smile and a wonderful personality. I do not discriminate about overweight, obese or fat people. Every person has feelings. It is awful that the man weighing 300 pounds is thought an unfit dad. Yes, old grandparents baby sit their grand kids. It is not easy to lose weight and a person should be accepted in society however fat he or she is. I think it is lucky we have the Internet for buying clothes. Airlines are mean on space and should have larger seats. Good luck.
• United States
23 Jun 12
Yes those airline seats are horribly small, but I dont mind buying an extra seat so I can feel comfortable. I even get why clothing is only made in certain sizes, its because the cost of extra material is expensive. As long as there are some manufacturers who make clothing my size, I am okay with that too, I just dont do business with stores who refuse to carry my size, not even for my friends and family would I make a purchase there, because they are discriminating against large people. I urge all fat people to do the same, because these biggots need to learn we are here to stay.
@GemmaR (8526)
23 Jun 12
I don't think that anybody denies that fat people have rights, but the issues that you discuss are genuine ones. With regards to being able to look after a child, I think that this is something that has to be considered as an individual case rather than just saying that everyone who is overweight can't look after a child. The simple fact is that if somebody has allowed themself to get to that weight, they don't understand enough about nutrition to look after a child and bring them up in a healthy way. I used to be fat myself, and have recently shed six stone. I feel so much better for it, and I know that you would to. Why would you want to be a size that clearly has an impact on the way that you're living your life?
• United States
23 Jun 12
Its my life and I live it as I choose. Food is one of the things that make life worth living to me, and I will not eat like a squirrel because someone else thinks I should. As far as not bringing up healthy children. I have one son who is struggling with his weigh right now. All my other kids are all according to their standards. I will not have my son feeling like he is an abomination, because his body type is like mine. I encourage him to eat healthier and be more active, but I will not belittle him about his weigh like my parents did to me. How dare anyone presume I would be an unfit parent. The fact is Ive lost weight plenty of times and gained it right back, because it never really was important to me to be skinny.
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
23 Jun 12
Wow, that is absurd. I have a nephew who also weights 300 pounds and very much active. I can't believe how people think that fat people are immobile huh? You are right, if grandparents as old as 70 years are allowed to take care of their little grandkids- and why not a 300 pounds 6feet tall young father cannot do his responsibility...all because he is fat- sounds funny. My nephew is 6ft tall, 38 yrs old and 300 pounds. A father of 16 yrs old boy and they played basketball.
• United States
23 Jun 12
Thats the distinction people dont seem to understand. If my weight rendered me completely immobile I would do something about it, but as long as I can walk in the park with my kids and enjoy them, I'm not losing a pound.
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
23 Jun 12
I definitely agree with you on this. Base on this case I saw online, why we discriminate fat people, just we discriminate different color of people, make it unconstitutional. They can still raise a good child, and they can still work to provide bread on the table. As long as he is a good parent who loves his own child unconditionally. What is matter most for a child, is that a parent can give him love.
• United States
23 Jun 12
That's what they fail to realize, there is no one who is capable of loving a child more than the parent. They are under the misguided idea that any responsible adult can substitute a parents love.