I understand why he has a hard time trusting people...

Jacksonville, Florida
June 28, 2012 4:12pm CST
My husband went to his friends house down the road. We will call him "T". While he was there another guy showed up. My husband was talking to the other guy for a few minutes. The guy pulled "T" away and started asking why he was hanging out with this guy and letting him hang out at his house!?! My husband has been friends with "T" for a while now. And "T" didn't stick up for him, didn't say a word and they were talking loud enough for my husband to hear them! How rude & immature!! My husband has no idea why the other guy did not like him, he has seen him before and been polite like always. No idea what the deal was with that one. My husband got upset of course and told both of them to shove it and told "T" he is no longer welcome at our house. Which is also going to upset our children because he was here all the time hanging out with my husband and my kids liked him too. We are going through enough right now, we don't need crap like this going on. We have enough real problems to deal with. I have just never seen this type of thing happen with GROWN men! I was very shocked to be honest and he was the last person I expected to act that way. Well anyway, I now understand why my husband hates having "friends" and has a hard time trusting people...
3 people like this
17 responses
• United States
28 Jun 12
That sucks... True friends are hard to find these days. I hate backstabbers who are nice to your face then talk crap about you behind your back or listen to others that talk crap about you. T should have stuck up for your hubby if he was a true friend. Even though your hubby told T to shove it, if he feels any remorse for what he did he should be apologizing to your hubby and explaining why he didn't stand up for him
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
28 Jun 12
I completely agree with you! True friends are very difficult to find now a days. I hate 2 faced people too. I agree that T should have stuck up for him if he was a friend, apparently he was never a true friend at all. Yeah he should still apologize even if he just calls to say it.
@inertia4 (27711)
• United States
7 Jul 12
Let me start this off this way. I feel the same way. In life we are lucky if we have one real good friend. Thats all we need anyway. Now, your husband is a smart man. Believe me. Trusting people is mostly a waste of time. And almost always turns into trouble. I think he did the right thing. Be on his side and support his decision.
• Jacksonville, Florida
8 Jul 12
That is the truth. If we have one true friend we are super lucky. I know, trusting people is stupid these days. Yeah it is troublesome trusting people. Oh I definitely understand now why he does not want to trust people.
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27711)
• United States
23 Jul 12
Look, you and your husband have each other. And that is the main thing. I have my girl friend and I have my kids. And to me that is everything. I also am lucky to have a real good friend. So I am in a good place in my life.
@else22 (4319)
• India
1 Jul 12
If such people are your husband's friends,how would you define enemies? I won't suggest you husband to break friends with the guy.Rather I would like him to be indifferent to him-I mean,neither friend nor enemy.He should now on take them as strangers.These guys deserve it.They neither deserve to be friends nor enemies.They are no more than strangers and should be treated like that.
• Jacksonville, Florida
1 Jul 12
Yeah it turns out "T" was not a true friend at all. That is how it is right now because T blamed the other guy for the gossip and the other guy blamed T for the gossip. My husband is just not being his buddy anymore. If he calls my hubby will talk to him for a few minutes but thats it and he is definitely not hanging out with him anymore.
@else22 (4319)
• India
2 Jul 12
Your husband is a wise man and he has taken the right decision.The guys are enemies or strangers in disguise.
@celticeagle (120390)
• Boise, Idaho
29 Jun 12
Really! How rude and immature is right. Sounds like the guy was jealous. That sounds like a girl thing to me. Haven't heard of many men acting this way. That's too bad that this behaviour just validates your husband's lack of trust. I think it is better you know about these two now and not later down the road when you have invested more in them.
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
Yeah, 2 grown men in their 40's acting that way. It shocked me. It does sound girly, that is exactly what I said to my husband when he got home from there. I told him they sound like a bunch of girls acting this way. I am glad we know too so we did not keep thinking "T" was a true friend...
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (120390)
• Boise, Idaho
30 Jun 12
It is sad but so many people now days are so selfish and just out for themselves. They don't care who they hurt or what happens as long as they get what they want.
• United States
29 Jun 12
Tell Hubby a true friend is not petty. A true friend does not care how many other friends you have! Tell him , he did the right thing , As Always!
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
He is NOT perfect Sarah I swear, Lol! I just love the good qualities he has so I only talk about those. Hopefully he will find a true friend one day because I think friends are a nice thing to have when they are true friends.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jun 12
Yes I agree. He deserves a good , loyal friend.
@Thoroughrob (11750)
• United States
28 Jun 12
I am sorry for your husband. It sounds like high school stuff. I didn't think men acted like that, I thought it was more with women.
• Jacksonville, Florida
28 Jun 12
Thanks. That is what I thought too!! Lol. I really thought only women did this type of crap but I guess some immature men do too. It does sound like high school I agree and that is why my husband just walked home and told him to stay away from now on. My husband hates all of the drama.
@Thoroughrob (11750)
• United States
28 Jun 12
I hate drama also.
@Zer0Stats (1316)
• India
2 Jul 12
Yes it is very hard to trust people out there.I don't even trust myself sometimes.
• Jacksonville, Florida
2 Jul 12
Thanks for making me laugh anyway. Lol.
@jillhill (37383)
• United States
29 Jun 12
Yup that would do it.! My son feels the same way. He has only a couple of good friends....and he likes it that way because like your husband it's hard to trust people....
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
Yeah, I don't blame either of them. It is so hard to find trustworthy people now a days...
@alutka (211)
29 Jun 12
trust, true friends, and sometimes hard to find both
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
It is hard to find true friends. And it is hard to trust people too.
@bounce58 (17524)
• Canada
29 Jun 12
I think it's hard for grown men to find friends and trust people. That's why we always stick with the ones we grew up with, or have had a history with. It's unfortunate that T didn't stick up for your hubby. I'd hate to think what he says when your husband is not around. I'm sure your kids will get over it.
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
I agree with you. It is very difficult for my husband to trust someone and every time something like this happens he says, this is why I don't trust anyone. Exactly! Now we wonder what he has said about him behind his back. Yeah, I am hoping with the kids that it will be out of sight, out of mind kind of thing...
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
29 Jun 12
You and your husband have no luck with friends! When you think you have found some people to be our friends turn around and back stab you! This is happening to you and your husband! I had this problem in the past. I am very careful to choose friends and don't really have alot of close friends. Sounds like you both need to be more careful choosing friends. There are alot of @ssholes out in this world ready to use the gullible people!
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
I know blue. Were just too nice. People see us, they think suckers and they stomp on us until we cannot take it anymore. It is us, we are too good to people I think to be honest. Most people take kindness for weakness now a days...Exactly, you said it right they know they can use us and get away with it for a little while anyway.
@AmbiePam (50245)
• United States
29 Jun 12
Your poor husband. He has the worst luck with family and friends.
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
I know he does! That is why he has such trust issues with people. For once I just wish he would find a normal good friend. It's partly because he lets people do it and get away with it most of the time. He is really forgiving on most things, this guy "T" has done a couple things and my husband just turned his cheek and forgave him to give him another chance. I think this was the last straw though...
• United States
29 Jun 12
People are the same as adults as they are when they are children and all too often they do not like to share their friends. In fact I think it is worse when they are adults as we tend to have less friends as we get older being not in the situation to make a lot more other then at work.
• Jacksonville, Florida
29 Jun 12
Yeah, that is what it seemed like to me. So immature and stupid! I just could not believe that 2 grown men in their 40's acted that way.
• United States
28 Jun 12
I would be upset at t as well and would not want anything to do with him either.
• Jacksonville, Florida
28 Jun 12
Yeah I really cannot blame him. That was messed up.
@meozard22 (872)
• Philippines
17 Jul 12
yeah I would also understand if that's the case. Just away from these kinds of people. Therefore, not all people have this kind of attitude.
@meozard22 (872)
• Philippines
17 Jul 12
yeah I would also understand if that's the case. Just away from these kinds of people. Therefore, not all people have this kind of attitude.
@jazel_juan (15767)
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
oh well because the friends he is with is not also the ones worth being friends with maybe? well how come that guy got mad at T for being friends with you hubby? maybe he is gay or something. weird. i thought guys are open with friends and new friends...