Lending Money

Philippines
June 28, 2012 7:19pm CST
I find it hard to collect the money that I lent from my colleagues. Usually I would just wait for them to approach me but this money borrowing-lending is becoming a habit. It doesn't even have interest! I should stop being nice to them. Anyway I only lend money because I don't want to spend, that way I'm sort of saving. This is a dilemma, I'm shy to collect my own money!
21 responses
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
Whenever someone borrows money from me, I consider it to be gone. I do not expect it to be coming back to me. When the debtor pays the money back, I will be thankful. If not, then it's okay. Next time s/he attempts to borrow money from me again, I will make up excuses and say no. You need to make a stand. It is your money anyway. If you still tolerate your colleagues' attitude, they would continue to abuse your kindness. However, if you are too shy to ask for their payments, then maybe do not allow them to borrw money from you next time.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
I definitely agree with you. People will abuse your kindness if she always do that. And even though it's just a small amount, still you've earn it and that's yours from your sweats so you should definitely have it back. People will actually learn a lot of lessons from experiences similar as what I have gone through with one of my friend. Anyways, have a great day!
@jkct02 (2859)
• Malaysia
29 Jun 12
If you can not collect your old debts, don't lend  - If you can not collect your old debts, don't lend again!
Yes, it is indeed a dilemma. Although it is your money, it is never easy to ask them back as we Asians are always careful of preserving other people's face(pride). I would have used the technique below: I will not ask for it on the day it is due. I will wait for another week. Then if no action is seen, I will bring the matter up when we have conversations. ..."what about the money now? Will you pay me tomorrow as I need to use that to buy something"... But make sure that you won't lend again whether the old debts are collected or not.
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
This got me thinking, maybe it is in our culture that we are shy to speak our minds even if it is for our benefit..
@jkct02 (2859)
• Malaysia
6 Jul 12
 We still need to speak without fear or hesitation -  We still need to speak without fear or hesitation when we have to
I would not say that it is 'shyness' that prevents we Asians to speak up for ourselves. Rather it is our consideration, sometimes too much of it, to make sure that there is no offensive element in what we mean, that put us off in voicing out if we are not sure if the words we say will be well accepted. It is in our culture. It is not bad. It is not good only when such a virtue is taken advantage of people to their benefit. We still need to speak without fear or hesitation when we have to.
@gaiza12 (4889)
• Philippines
1 Jul 12
I find it hard as well especially when it is a friend who has borrowed money from me. There was even a time when I really don't have any money left, I really wished to ask the money borrowed from me from a friend but I really can't ask for it because I am too shy to ask. I know it's my money, but I am also thinking maybe she also doesn't have the money to pay yet because she hasn't talked to me about it. I also have a small business that I am having a hard time asking for the payment for those who ask that the payment will be done on the payday. Payday came, but still now money. It's a good thing I am a little patient with these people. If not, I could have ask for it already in a bad way..lol!
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
I definitely know the feeling! It's like you don't want to hassle another person even if you have a right to claim!
@simonelee (2718)
• China
29 Jun 12
When people know you have a savings and you have a soft heart they'll turn to you and later on abuse it. They will keep coming back even if borrowing money is no longer important as before. It become a routine. For some it's easy to borrow someones money and when it comes to paying as if they don't owe you something. If you remind them they get mad and start saying bad things about you.
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
I think it is a word of mouth, maybe one of my friends mentioned to another friend that I lend money to this person and then so the story goes.. I will put a stop into this. No more money lending for me.
• Canada
29 Jun 12
In all truth, I would just stop lending it all together!! Just ensure that each time they ask to say that you are not having a good month and you really do not have much to spare. I think after a while, they will get the point and not come to you when asking for money anymore!!
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
I know for sure that if my colleagues borrow money from me again, I will have an excuse not to lend them.. It should stop their habit of coming into me like I do lending money business :)
• United States
29 Jun 12
It is messed up because you should not have to hunt them down to collect your money. I have learned that lesson a long time ago. That is why I stopped lending money to people. If I can afford it, I just give it to them because it stops the hassle. They really have to show me they deserve it and be there for me when I need them.
29 Jun 12
I've also learned the hard way to only lend what you can afford to give away. For example; if someone ask to borrow $100 and you know you can only afford to give away $20, just tell them you only have $20 to loan. That way if they don't pay you back, there won't be any hard feelings.
@niairen01 (1018)
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
Yup, and that's the problem. It's actually funny isn't it? You were not that one who borrowed yet you are the one who's shy to collect when it should be the other way around. We are on the same boat, but luckily, I don't lend money anymore, since I seldomly went outside the house. Anyway, why not just deposit it in a bank? if you just want to save it? at least you'll get interest from it. Or you can even invest it somewhere safe and get profit out of it?
• Philippines
6 Jul 12
Hi niaren! Yeah, I also thought of putting my money on a bank. I am just thinking which is a good bank, bpi, bdo, metrobank or pnb.. Do you have suggestions?
@Jacruz25 (1124)
• Philippines
5 Jul 12
you just need to speak to them frankly that they owe you something. I think you're a shy type of person and i'm a bit like that too.
@gaiza12 (4889)
• Philippines
2 Jul 12
I find it hard as well especially when it is a friend who has borrowed money from me. There was even a time when I really don't have any money left, I really wished to ask the money borrowed from me from a friend but I really can't ask for it because I am too shy to ask. I know it's my money, but I am also thinking maybe she also doesn't have the money to pay yet because she hasn't talked to me about it. I also have a small business that I am having a hard time asking for the payment for those who ask that the payment will be done on the payday. Payday came, but still now money. It's a good thing I am a little patient with these people. If not, I could have ask for it already in a bad way..lol!
@512771751 (1096)
• China
2 Jul 12
Hi,girl_thinking, I have the same experience as you have. When I was in junior middle school, I lent money to my two dear friends because of they want to buy gifts to their bf. But until, they don't contact with me any more. I am so dissatisfied with them whenever I think of this.
@adforme (2116)
29 Jun 12
Lending money should be done within your discretion. I have been asked for money before, and I have lended more. Usually the more you lend, the more you seek to collect it. I don't usually ask for petty cash back which is usually under $5.00. I am not a bank and when people always ask me for money; I can almost say they don't respect me. Don't be shy about collecting your money. It is yours to collect. Helping people out is honorable, enabling them to use you is out of the question.
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
i'm like that as well. I often lend money to my friends especially when they need it. But sometimes they forget to pay me especially when they borrowed a small amount! And it takes really long. But what I do is, every payday, I ask them if they can pay me on that date. It's hard if you don't keep up with the people you lend money to. It's okay to lend money because you're helping them, but if you're going to be in need, it should only be fair that you ask for your money back. When they borrowed money, it was given to them easily. Payment shouldn't be as hard. I don't mind if the person tells me that they can't pay just yet. But they don't have to run or hide from me, and they can tell me straight up if they can't pay it yet. I am an easy person to talk to. I don't mind if you really can't pay because we always have trouble sometimes. But I appreciate people who are honest, than those who I have to chase all over the place just to find out if they can pay or not.
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
Hi there! You should definitely collect your money. Being shy won't really help you. And it's not savings at all if they don't pay you. It would be better if you just put it in the bank since it has interest...that way, you can definitely save. Hopefully those friends/colleagues of yours will pay you back as soon as possible. Have a good day!
• United States
29 Jun 12
I never lend money out to anybody because I am always afraid that it will ruin our friendship. In most cases people never pay others back and I do not have the money to lend to others.
@kelzbelz (36)
• United States
29 Jun 12
you could try borrowing the money you leaded to them back.and then remind them that they owed you that money and never payed you back.
@maxzo11 (24)
• Bulgaria
29 Jun 12
collect money from friends, you can simply tell them that you need something, for holiday, gift for someone, for investment...and stop giving money..there are people who never return money
29 Jun 12
You shouldn't be shy to collect your own money. Next time instead of letting your money be borrowed just save it in your bank. That way your money is safe and you also earn interest from it. Some people are just a great debtor, once they get the money they forget to pay it or the worst thing is have no plan in mind to pay it. I'm done with people like that, who owed me money and never pay back.. I never asked them coz I know that they knew it for sure and for me it's not that biggie.. the good thing is they can never borrow money from me again.
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
29 Jun 12
with some people if you don't ask you will never get it back, You just have to ask them it is your money they owe you so get up the courage and do it.
@bLadeee (403)
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
It is really hard to lend a money. In your state you should stop lending your money since in that way you are really not saving money at all and you're being shy to collect your own money. It'll be a problem if they don't pay you. If you really love lending money you should think first if that person is reliable (he/she will still pay you).
@ardoy0731 (6865)
• Philippines
29 Jun 12
I guess you should be more strict on collecting to them and don't be shy cause it will benefit them for sure.There are some people you used to borrow something but still the one who get angry when you have to get the things that you lend to them.