Moving on...Please help!
By bb_gabs
@bb_gabs (205)
Philippines
July 15, 2012 8:47pm CST
It's been four months now since I wrote about being betrayed by my husband and my in-laws, until now, still, I cannot find the answer why he did that to me, so I just decided to move on with my life with my three kids. I am trying to live my life as normal as I can so my kids will not have a hard time moving on without their father. Now I doubled the effort to show my kids how much I love them and even if their father have abandoned them, I make them feel that it will be okay and I can be a father and mother for them at the same time, and i think i have really handled the situation very well. I don't let my in-laws visit my kids, and now I am selling our house, so that we can move to some place far from my in-laws house(for their house is just a block away from us). I want my husband to give my children the support they need. The right support is what I need for my children because now, he is just sending only 10,000 pesos (about 250 dollars) for my children every month, and it is not really enough for my three kids need, their food, their clothing and their education. I am really worried for next school year, my two kids will turn to grade 7 and while they are growing, their needs is getting bigger also. I want to file for petition for support to him, but I don't know how I will do it for my husband is living outside our country. He is living in Canada right now. Can you give me some advice on how I can file a petition for support to my husband? I am in the Philippines now.
4 people like this
12 responses
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
16 Jul 12
If your husband is an OFW and went to Canada thru the POEA, I think you can seek help from this agency and prompt him to remit the money as child support. I'm really not sure on the procedures on this, but I have experienced having a housemate back in Dubai when he started to have an affair with another housemate. He received a notice from the POEA and he was summoned to appear at the Phils. Embassy and settle the petition filed by his wife for child support. That's all I know, but it wouldn't hurt to ask them if they can do something to help you.
1 person likes this
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
16 Jul 12
Oh wow, that's tougher than I thought. Well, you can always swing by the POEA website first; check it out and they have this assistance portion and also some numbers and email address which you can always contact to send in your questions. It's a good start, I guess.
@ryanong (9665)
• Vietnam
16 Jul 12
Oh, i am sorry to hear your situation...I don't know why he just support that amount for his kids...he gets problem with his financial?
He is Canadian, you can ask some officers in the Canada embassy in there to help you find out the way.
I wish you and your kids all the best!!!
@maximax8 (31053)
• United Kingdom
16 Jul 12
Well done for getting on with your life in a positive way. You are showing your three kids very much love and care. I think your ex-husband lives in Canada and salaries are higher there than in the Philippines. You should ask your ex-husband if he could pay extra per month because the cost of living has risen. Maybe ask if he could pay four hundred dollars a month. It would be challenging for you to do this legally because he is living outside the Philippines. You could find out the address of the Canadian embassy and write to them. You could ask a lawyer if he can help you. Good luck.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
16 Jul 12
Look for a good lawyer.
You have the rights to demand support from your ex.
Check from POEA how can you file such case and if your ex won't provide what you are asking for, the government can deport him back to our country.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
16 Jul 12
I'm sorry to hear that your husband betrayed you. I can only imagine how difficult it would be to try and start a new life over with your children. I'm glad that you have been able to handle the situation well. That is very important for your children to see that. I would ask someone in that area who knows the laws and how it should be done. Keep working on it I'm sure that you should be able to get help. Especially if he has three kids and is trying to avoid paying you what you need.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
16 Jul 12
I do too. It is sad that he has done this to you and your children. People become so selfish at times. They only think about themselves. It's an awful thing. Because after all we expect that we will stay in love with that person and be able to spend our life with them. It doesn't always pan out like that unfortunately. Keep asking people I'm sure someone should be able to help you.
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
16 Jul 12
hi lost it cop;y paste.You need to get legal help from legal aid to get that support f rom him or get a lawyer relative or
lawyer friend to help you get that extra support you need.there are
lawyers that do pro Bono work free so do some checking so you get expert advice.they need to k now you are in one country and the ex is in a different country so they can figure out how you do this./
@bb_gabs (205)
• Philippines
16 Jul 12
hi Hatley! I miss you all here guys at mylot. I think I really need a lawyer for this but do you think I need two lawyers? One from my place and one where my husband is located? I am really upset whenever I think of my children not getting what is right for them. :(
@kingparker (9673)
• United States
16 Jul 12
I don't have the right advice for you. But I knew that if a father would care about his own children, he would do anything for them, financially he should consider giving full support. But if he is living outside of the country, and you don't know a way to get him to give full support, why not consult with a marriage lawyer, everything has to go through court, won't it? So, go through a lawyer would help much for you anyway.
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
4 Feb 13
Thanks for sharing.Sorry to hear this, i was in your country so i am aware of such things there, there number of male is less compared to female, more over there is no divorce and getting annulment is costly,
I am told there are some organizations who can fight for you free.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
5 Oct 12
Hi, bb_gabs! I hope you are feeling better now despite being separated from your husband. Maybe it would be best for you to seek legal advice regarding your problem. That way, your problem can be handled well.
I hope and pray that you and the kids will get through this phase. I applaude you for being a courageous mom!
@natliegleb (5175)
• India
19 Nov 12
i think after your kids turn to grade 7,you can take a chance and get the moneyu and just keep moving ahead in life
@vidhyaprakash_2 (7116)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi friend, sad to hear about your situation. I admire your will power. It is really hard to raise a kid being a single parent, as well as not good to live with a betraying partner, so your decision is right. There is nothing wrong is asking support from him, as they are his kids and he is in need to pay for them. wish you to get success in your petition.
