Is it okay to have a relationship with your bestfriend's ex?

@Axai2012 (371)
July 28, 2012 8:11am CST
Have you ever experienced this? Or did you have second thoughts of having a relationship even though you felt strongly for each other? Is it okay to do do?
8 responses
maclanis
@maclanis (2357)
• Belgium
28 Jul 12
It depends on the situation. If you're really in love with his/her ex, then maybe it's okay. But you definitely shouldn't get together right after they've broken up. Your best friend will need time to adjust, he/she might be mad at first, but if you explain it, he/she might understand.
1 person likes this
Jane
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
bhaby I want to add more, if that guy betrayed your best-friend- what's the assurance he won't betray you in the end?
bhabycatch013
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
If I am the girl I will think many times if I really considered her as my BEST FRIEND I will not do anything that can hurt her. Cause I believe I can get many Boyfriend if I want to but I can't get many BEST FRIEND
Axai2012
@Axai2012 (371)
•
28 Jul 12
Don't you think it depends on how strong the friendship is as well?
shylade
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
If you love each other, that won't really matter. But of course you will have to consider how your bestfriend would feel. You may try to just forget about your feelings towards your bestfriend's ex for respect. But if that won't work and the feeling is so strong then you must be prepared to face its consequences.
1 person likes this
Axai2012
@Axai2012 (371)
•
28 Jul 12
It is the facing the consequences that is difficult in this situation because of the risk of losing either one of the two special people in your life. Don't you think? Unless of course, your friend understands.
bhabycatch013
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
Best friend is still more special cause you spend more time together before besides you might know the reasons of break ups don't you think it can happen also to you?
1 person likes this
shylade
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
I said, if the feeling is really strong then how can you fight love? If you can still fight the feeling then good for you. But if you can't fight the feeling anymore, then you must be ready to face the consequences. If your never been in such situation it is hard to decide what to do but if that does happen it has a purpose.
annavi23
@annavi23 (6522)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
I agree it can be quite an awkward stage in life. But if two people are in love, you can't change the fact that you have to fight for it. Just be sure to let the friend know and be sure they don't hate you for all that doings. But most of the time there will be hatred unless it really depends how much love has left for them...
1 person likes this
annavi23
@annavi23 (6522)
• Philippines
1 Aug 12
yes, be sure of your own feelings and what do you really want in life. sometimes people need space and tme to think of things through. some realtionships are just for experiment, some for serious acts...depends on both parties involved. if it's true love you'll know it in the long run...
Axai2012
@Axai2012 (371)
•
31 Jul 12
True, I think so too that it really depends on how much the friend still loves the ex. I think it really wise to take that into consideration. Thank you for your insight.
Olleenz
@Olleenz (3398)
• Indonesia
28 Jul 12
You must talk with your friend about this relation. If not, your friend WILL think you stab her / him in the back (perhaps he/she might think that you causing their breaking relationship).
Axai2012
@Axai2012 (371)
•
31 Jul 12
Yes, I think communicating with your bestfriend is the right thing to do. Thanks for your insight.
1 person likes this
Hazelme
@Hazelme (647)
• United States
31 Jul 12
I wouldn't get with my "bestfriend's ex" at all. I don't think it's cool to get with your best friend's ex, think about how she/he will feel. Even though my best friend could say it doesn't bother her/ him at all, it's just mest up in my opinion. There are lots of fish in the sea, why would we want the one our best friend took a bite? There are many cases were friendship gets torn apart because of a "Ex" . and most of the time you don't even last with her/ his ex, so do you think it's really worth it?
Axai2012
@Axai2012 (371)
•
31 Jul 12
Given that situation, I wouldn't get involve with my bestfriend's ex, to be honest. Even if she consents to it.
samson1
@samson1 (738)
• Jamaica
31 Jul 12
If presented with that scenario, I do not know if I would. I think that, depending on the type of mutual friendship that exist between best friends; should an intimate relationship be struck up between the best friend's ex, then that situation (relationship) may create the condition where 'conflict of interest' issues may occur.
Jane
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
In my opinion, I won't keep a good relationship with my bestfriend's ex. A friend for me especially a bestfriend is a person whom I trusted and treasure next to my family- so I won't betray a best-friend's trust.
bhabycatch013
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
28 Jul 12
hi Axai, I don't think so for me it will be awkward every time seeing them together Though I don't have the feelings anymore for my ex but some people don't mind it maybe it depends upon the person. happy mylotting