I told my parents they should pay me for the hours they made me call out for

United States
August 18, 2012 12:42pm CST
My parents pretty much forced me to call out of work today because they're making me go to a bbq dinner for my cousin later today. I didn't find out about this thing enough time in advance to request the time off and my parents were basically like oh well, you're gonna have to call in sick. The more I thought about it the angrier I got. I'm 20 years old and hear my parents are telling me to call out of my job. My mom just came into my room and asked if I had called my job to tell them I won't be coming in. I already called and I told her what I said. Then I kind of jokingly told my mom they should pay me my hourly wage for the shift they made me call out of work for. My mom told me not to get smart and then she went out and told my dad. When he heard what I said he started telling my mom oh does she want to pay for the laundry service, rent, car insurance, and gas? Of course I was able to overhear all this from my room. I really don't think it's right that they made me call out of work for this and that they use the fact that I still live at home as leverage to get me to do stuff. Just because I still live here doesn't give them any right to make me call in sick to work. I just get angrier and angrier the more I think about it.
2 people like this
6 responses
• United States
18 Aug 12
I'm sorry CourtKnee, but your parents' code of ethics leaves a bad taste in my mouth. It's dishonest and could cause you to lose your job. I would think, being 20 you can still live as an adult in your parents' home. It seems you could tell them NO I won't call in work. What can they do? Hog tie you? I don't like their work ethic at all.
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Aug 12
Yeah, I'm pretty upset too that they told me to call in sick. They only want me to go this thing for my cousin because a few months ago I missed the birthday dinner for my grandma because my bf's family had already planned a disney trip which I knew about before the dinner. My cousins flew in for it and everything, I felt bad for missing it but it was also the last trip I'd have with my boyfriend for a while because of the army. My grandma seemed ok with it but I saw here and I was alone one day and she told me I should've been there and told me I should go to my cousin's wedding in August, next week. Well the wedding is in Missouri and I can't just buy an expensive ticket for the weekend. So now my parents are making me go today because they don't want my grandma mad. It's not my fault I wasn't told 2 weeks ahead of time so I could request it off. I don't think it's fair for them to make me do this and I feel it might cause a major argument later..
@verolop29 (1096)
• United States
19 Aug 12
Hi courtney525 Not that u haven't already but u shoud sit down and have a long calming talk with both of it parents so they won't be in the dark of things. I still think they see I as a small child who is being defient lol! When u feel itself starting to get mad or upset or if anyone feels that way take a breather! I'm no expert and I'm not even sure this'll work but I read a lot of stuff about other ppl going thru what ur going thru..u know their parents treating them with little to no respect at all... But all in all I hope all turns out well!
• United States
20 Aug 12
If the housing situation isn't working, there are other options: You could go off to college, which would mean living in a dorm; there, you would earn a degree that would hopefully allow you to get a decent job. You could work as a live-in caregiver for an elderly or disabled person. This would provide housing and some monetary compensation. You could work as a live-in nanny for a family. You could take a position as a caretaker for a property. There are various arrangements. You can find listing in the Caretaker Gazette. You could rent an apartment or house and split it with a roommate or two. Plenty of people do that. You could buy an inexpensive travel trailer or Class C and full-time until a different housing option became viable. Right now, you are living with your parents and paying nothing. From what you have said, you aren't even doing your own laundry or paying for the upkeep of your own car. You are living as a child, so don't expect that they are going to treat you as anything else.
• United States
20 Aug 12
I'm in college now and my school does have dorms, but I think it would cost about 10k a year for that. What I'd eventually like to do is move out into an apartment or something. But first I have to find a better paying part-time job so I can actually afford a place to live. I'm still not sure what I'll do though because I'd really like to save up my money so I can live with my boyfriend after he gets out of the army in a few years or even have enough money to move wherever he'll be and we could either live together or I could just rent like a studio apartment or something cheap. I just don't know what my parents would think about all that. I'm tired of living to please them, I want the freedom to make my own decisions based on what I want
• United States
20 Aug 12
You may still want to see about some sort of caregiving or companion deal. Sometimes, older people will have a room they'd like to rent out just to have someone around. Your religious leader may be able to put you in touch with someone like that. Or, one of the professors at your school may even have some space he or she would like to rent out. It's worth checking about. There are all sorts of options out there that would allow you to move out without having to have a huge amount of money for rent. You want your freedom, but you're not going to have it if you are living with your parents. Honestly, this is why I'd insist that any kids I may ever have move out and live in the dorms when they go to college. I'd want for them to be independent of me, and that's just too hard to manage when they are under the same roof.
@Blondie2222 (22393)
• United States
18 Aug 12
That's messed up they made out call out of work just for a bbq dinner, really? Don't they know making you call out of work can cause you to lose your job and it would look bad on you if you did lose your job and try to apply for another? I'm glad my parent's don't do that. I still live at home and I'm never forced to call out of work. I pay for my car, car insurance, phone bill and internet bill. But still they should never make you call out of work. Is this how they were taught when they were grown up to call out of work for events like this? How are you supposed to make a living if your losing your hours? Next time stand up for yourself and tell them you can't keep calling off you need your job to help pay for the things your dad was complaining about. Good luck with it all.
• United States
20 Aug 12
The more I thought about it the more upset I got. This definitely won't be happening again because next time I'll actually stand up for myself and tell them. I'm tired of living to please them and do what they want me to do. I'd really like to have the freedom to do what I like and what pleases me.
@NailTech (6890)
• United States
18 Aug 12
Yea, that was totally uncalled for. I have parents that get on my nerves and I'm almost 50. They will never outgrow this especially if you don't try to get out while you can. Why are they making you go to the BBQ n the first place? stopped going to those relative things when I was 14 cause I couldn't stand them anymore. They wouldn't do much at theirs except sit around and talk and then my cousins would all get together and be with one another and I felt left out. You are 20 and you don't deserve that kind of treatment. You weren't getting "smart" as you were being forced to go to this BBQ and they should have the respect to tell you ahead of time. My brother has a job that lets him take off time but they need 1-2 days ahead of time notice. It is only right when there are cases that can be helped like this. You were joking and she took it seriously and told your dad, sounds like something what my mom would do only dad never says anything most of the time thank God. I have enough to deal with with her anyways at times. I'm guessing you're the quite one who they always boss around and pick at cause they know you won't cause a ruckus right? These are the things parents do that make me wanna do the opposite of if I had a kid, and in your case you're basically an adult over 18. I hate that old cliche they use cause you still live at home, that is BS. They are just controlling. I know what you feel. I get things thrown at me that shouldn't as well even at 49! My brother is the lucky one, he gets away with everything. He can say just about anything to her and she will be kissing his azz after the next five minutes where as if I did the same exact thing she wouldn't be talking to me! If say this to her she knows how to push my buttons and get me really insulted! Just crazy stuff. Some parents should have to take parenting classes before they have any kids.
• United States
20 Aug 12
They wanted me to go because back in April I couldn't make it to my grandma's surprise 80th b-day dinner. I was in Disney world with my bf and his family as his last trip before leaving for the army. I found out about the trip before I knew about the party. Of course I felt bad for missing it but I sent my parents with a card and I called her the of her actual birthday. All my cousins flew in from out of town and the next time I saw her she told me I really should've come and now it's like she's holding it against me. So my parents wanted me to go to this thing because that same grandma would be there and they just wanted me to show up. I'm quite upset that they made me do this and it won't be happening again because I'll say something. I'm started to get really frustrated living the way my parents want me to live and trying to please them instead of living to please myself and doing what I'd like to do.
@shaggin (37310)
• United States
18 Aug 12
If you are working it would be nice if you gave them some of your earnings to help out with the bills and things. I dont think it is right forvthem to expect you to call in sick to work though just because you live with them. You may live with them but are an adult and should be allowed to live your life how you want and make your own decisions.
• United States
18 Aug 12
If they wanted me to give money for something I wouldn't mind, because i'm honestly trying to save up to move out anyways. They don't ask for anything though and that's ok too. But I don't think it's right that I have to do whatever they say just because I live there. I would just like to be treated as more of an adult.
@pahak627 (4198)
• Philippines
18 Aug 12
That is your concern and for you to decide on it. But if I'm to ask my opinion about this, I find it unreasonable to call in sick just to have dinner. Most of us, here filipinos, unmarried children who are already working are still living with their parents. I don't know with the others but for me, we should ask time from our children only when they are not at work.