If things were different...

@toniganzon (49920)
Philippines
August 24, 2012 1:56am CST
In the movies, wives don't usually get along with mother-in-laws. The MIL usually seems to be evil. They get into the nerve of their daughter in laws. I, however, have a good mother-in-law and we get along pretty well. She's like a friend to me. Going shopping together, zip lining together, and doing other fun things. This made me think. If things were different between us, how would I handle a wicked mother in law? How would you?
4 people like this
18 responses
@SIMPLYD (79651)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
My mother-in-law , when i was just newly married with my husband is a snob or "mataray". But i am much more than her. So we had an encounter one time and had a shouting match when i was in my maternity leave , after giving birth to our daughter. I really didn't speak to her for weeks and she was trying to win me back. My husband just let it be. After that, she was already kind to me, because maybe she realized i am not to be intimidated by her.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
Way to go D! I was thinking I would have been doing the same if i were in your shoes.
@SIMPLYD (79651)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Well, i have to do it, lest she will forever do that to me.
@deazil (4556)
• United States
25 Aug 12
@julyteen (13258)
• Davao, Philippines
25 Aug 12
It's different in my case. My mother-in-law like me so much for her daughter. That is the reason, she supported me in all my actions specially related to business. Aside from that she is the one shoulder all the expenses during our wedding. How lucky I am, I found a very nice and kind MIL.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
We are the lucky ones!
@julyteen (13258)
• Davao, Philippines
26 Aug 12
Yeah, we are very much lucky. We should give honor to our both MIL. They are endangered species nowadays.
• United States
25 Aug 12
I tried for twenty-five years to please my MIL with no success. The day she decided to destroy my son's prom night, I finally blessed her out soundly. She began to behave. After that, I would send her gifts for no reason and although my intentions were good, she was so suspicious she wouldn't even talk to me about them. She would, however, call my husband asking, "Why is she doing this? Why?" He would tell her that I enjoyed sending people gifts. She never believed him and thought I had ulterior motives. So, when a MIL hates you, there isn't a whole lot you can do to change it. She tried to break us up every way possible without success. Had she succeeded I often wonder if my husband would have had someone who loved him enough to care for him several years after his major stroke. I'm grateful we ignored her and enjoyed each other as long as we were allowed to do so. The sadder news is that my mother was no kinder to my husband. We were sad to lose our mothers, but relieved to not have to constantly be on guard against their intrusiveness.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
26 Aug 12
Oh wow! What a wicked witch. How can she be kind to you when she couldn't even be kind to her very own flesh and blood?! I admire wives who can stood up to their MILs.
25 Aug 12
congratulation,you are so lunckly,because around me,some people with her mother-in-laws only get well,but not going shoping or others,like a friends.I guess your mother-in-law must a kindly and fashionable people.I really like the feeling,one day i have the opportunity live with mother-in-law,hope we also get along and like a friends,do some interesting things.hope you happy every day.
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Yes, she;s fashionable and very open minded.
• Bangladesh
24 Aug 12
You're surely a lucky one to have such wonderful mother-in-law, with whom you get along so well. The credit of course goes to you as well. I guess if I were a girl and if, unfortunately I would have to handle a ''monster-in-law'', I'd perhaps show her examples of good mother-in-laws in different ways, like movies or making up a story and telling her. If that seem not to work, I wouldn't hesitate to discuss about her problem and how we could have a healthy relationship if she changes a little bit. Good share, thank you! Have a great day..
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
I think that wouldn't work! MILs are stubborn to the core and they are self-righteous. I guess i'm lucky to have one that had suffered under her own MIL, she doesn't want to do the same to me.
24 Aug 12
i get on quite well with my mother in law. we arent exactly friends as such but we do get on well. i did however have a really ever "mother-in-law" .. my ex partners mother was terrible and she did nothing but try to break us up the two years we were together, and she eventually suceeded. just goes to show ythe relationship obviosuly wasnt that strong anywhere but yeah, its not good lol!
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
Horrible, wicked witch! But then again, thanks to her you found your real love.
28 Aug 12
thats true, maybe i should thank her for showing that although i thought i had found the love of my life, i hadn't, it was yet to come lol!
@cerebellum (3871)
• United States
26 Aug 12
I got along well with my mother in law also. In fact sometimes I liked her, better than her son. After we were divorced, I still kept in touch with her all the time. I don't know how I would handle a wicke one either.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
26 Aug 12
I think if i were to divorce my husband, me and my MIL would still get along. But i'm not looking forward to a divorce.
@bellis716 (4806)
• United States
26 Aug 12
My mother-in-law wasn't wicked, just different. I didn't understand her. Wish I had a chance to live those early years over. I'm sure we could have gotten along better. She's been gone for over 30 years.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
26 Aug 12
Too bad you didn't have a chance to get to know her.
@sweetyethot (1738)
• China
25 Aug 12
lucky u! im not married yet.I hope I would be as lucky as you to have a good relationship with my unknown mother-in-law.BTW,you must be easygoing yourself.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Oh yes I am!
@gnlaser (31)
• China
25 Aug 12
it is very difficult to deal the relationship between wife and mother in law
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Not in all situations.
@toyota4k (1212)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Movies are made up and even if it was based on a true story, a scriptwriter has to change some accounts to make the movie interesting and not a boring one. I loved my mother-in-law and my daughter-in-law loves us both with my wife.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Movies maybe fictional but they usually get the idea on real life situation. It just can't be purely imagination. And if you have read some of the comments here, others have suffered from their MIL.
@freedang (320)
• China
25 Aug 12
you are lucky,this phenomenon is very commen in my nation.i guess the source of all problem is the husband.after all.those two women both try to get his love.and there is a little joke about that.usually,grandmother and grandson have a good relationship but they both dont get alone with the wife,just because that the enermy of my enermy is my friend
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
I have a son and i'm not sure if i'll ever have another child. Now I'm just wondering if I would be able to accept his wife someday.
@koopharper (6284)
• Canada
24 Aug 12
Mother-in-laws get a lot of bad press. Mine was a sweet little old lady. In real life the biggest source of conflict is interfering between a couple. To them their child is still their little boy or girl. It's important to give honor and respect but don't give them opportunity or reason to interfere. If you can manage that you'll probably do just fine.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
If there's one thing i'm lucky about my mother-in-law, it's her own experience in life that she doesn't want me to go through. She told me that once in her life she had suffered from her MIL, thus making a promise to herself that she would never intervene in any of her children's family. Thank goodness I don't have to deal with an interfering MIL.
@riyauro (6430)
• India
24 Aug 12
hahah you are lucky to have a good mother in law. I have a okay okay type mother in law. I guess this is because my husband and his mother don't get along well so she is sweet with me. My husband say they tortured him when he was a kid and he has hatred towards his parents. I have told him several times to forget what happened in the past and think about the future but he somehow can't forget his past. I don't know how I would react to a wicked mother in law. Thanks for sharing and have a wonderful day ahead.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
I"m so sorry to hear that your husband doesn't get along well with his own parents. It's so sad that it turned out that way.
@jazel_juan (15767)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
I often hear "horror" stories about in laws..but i am still quite lucky as my in laws are far..lol they are in nueva ecija. but i have met them,just this year they went here in Zamboanga and visited us, they are pretty nice and i easily get along with them...maybe because they are like very silent people and are funny too... but i also do not know how to handle a wicked mother in law.. i might just probably ignore someone like her.. especially if know my husband will be sandwiched in between.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
I"m pretty sure I would be arguing with my husband if i had a wicked MIL. I'll take it on him.
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
i would have a wicked mother-in-law, i would stay as far as possible from her. i mean, i wouldn't live in a house next to hers. anyway, if i really have to see her, it would only be on special occassions. i am sure my husband would understand why. the more we see each other often, the more tensions there is between us.
@toniganzon (49920)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
Yeah, that's right. But what if she lives near and moving away is not that easy?
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
10 Jan 13
You are very lucky that you have a mother-in-law that you are really able to get along with. Now with my mother-in-law, I wouldn't say that she is an evil mother-in-law, but I also don't really have the best of relationships with her. I think that the reason that I do have some problems with my mother-in-law is actually because of the fact that the two of us are very similar in many ways and of course we are both Aries so we are both quite bull-headed.
• India
24 Aug 12
I believe it all depends on how you handle circumstances, and when you face it your mind starts working in that direction only and not in a way to think what would you do if things were different. We generally think about these things when we are enjoying these circumstances.