Have You Ever Felt Alone?

Thailand
August 24, 2012 2:41am CST
Hello My friends, It's been a while since my last post here i was quite busy on my other online activities. I actually meet a cool guy and on my same status as a single parent, we had a bit of conversations about personal life and eventually became intimate. We Suddenly developed a sense of caring with each other and became more emotional attached. We agreed to be in relationship online and it went through few months. But. now i was alone again, i guess he left me already, he was disappointed with me. I am so upset for a month now, he is not talking with me and he does't treat me like before. We had some sort of arguments, that leads to disapproval for a certain issue, i reacted violently as in i lost of control and i spoke words over the top. I made myself so rough towards him and i am regretting it now.. if Only i can turn back times like how we were before those disagreements. I felt special feelings for him. We even like to meet personally and work out what we have started, but now i felt he was gone already. He told me that he loved me but now the love is gone for an instant. I guess i am not in the position to complain like this, most of you might think i was pathetic, that i feel in love online. You might not agree with my feelings but i would like to know if do you think it will be fine if i will not continue of my crazy feeling for him. I was planning to forgot everything and just learn from this mistake not to get in attached emotionally to anyone online. please help me...
2 people like this
20 responses
• United States
25 Aug 12
Was your disagreement over personal beliefs that you hold dear? Sadly, some people just want everything to be exactly the same in their partner, whether you met online or met face to face. It sounds like YOUR love ran much deeper than his, and it might be better in the long run to be involved with someone so immature. Always remember that your eventual life partner will have to accept you AND your child, and it sounds as if this guy could barely accept you. My last partner and I were very compatible on many issues, but on those where we didn't agree, it was because we had different experiences (he had two sons and I had a daughter). Of course I eventually fell in love with him, but he always seems to be holding something back from me. I came to a point where I asked myself-who do I love more-him or me? I chose me, and the relationship fizzled out. I met my current boyfriend online, and while we share interests, we are VERY different. We both have been changing ourselves for one another. I wish you well in your search for someone who values you and your beliefs. You deserve better. You're NOT pathetic, you're just going through the natural process of ending a relationship. All the best.
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Yes it was over personal beliefs, i always thought we had a mutual understanding towards many things, we are in the same boat (single parents) and we agreed to accept this status and even come to the point of making a decision to be together in person, but i guess there is something more of a reason why this all happened and i was also trying to find out why it became like this.... it wasn't like this before... but then, its time to move on...i will try to keep my self more busy and maybe eventually stop thinking on him....
@deazil (4556)
• United States
25 Aug 12
Real love is partly about forgiving. You were upset and said somethings you wish you hadn't. This happens to most of us. You are human. He should be able to forgive. Maybe he is over sensitive and this is for the best. If something like an argument and harsh words can make him stop talking to you, what kind of a relationship would that be? Would you always be afraid that you might say something wrong? Always trying to be careful of how you speak? That wouldn't be right. If you ask an old married couple whether they ever had a really bad argument many of them will tell you yes, but their love was stronger than to let that argument destroy what they have. They say "I'm sorry" and move on. Don't bother with him. You'll start feeling better when you can think of other things and then one day you'll realize that you haven't thought about him in a long time. The heart is slow to heal. Internet romances don't often work out. Sometimes they do but I think it's not the majority. Get busy with your life. It's time to move on. Good luck and stay happy.
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Oh yes thank you for understanding my feelings, i was also thinking that if he really loves me as he said before he should not let this issue became worse that leads me sending him a break up notes. Why don't he value such things we share when we are still in good terms, is that little issue would fade his love easily or if ever he just made an alibi to eventually go away from me to end our relationship.
@deazil (4556)
• United States
25 Aug 12
Maybe he was not sincere to begin with and the argument was a good excuse for him to leave. False love, false friend. It's difficult to know what is really in the minds of others. But you can be sure of what's in your own mind. And I think you know this is probably for the best. Smile. Be happy that it wasn't worse, that you were not more involved with him. You're young. You should be happy. Be careful who you trust with your heart. Buy yourself some chocolates and have a wonderful life!
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Thank you so much that gives me a relief, yes i felt it he made a way for that argument to escape, but now i set him free i won't regret this kind of people who doesn't value real feelings i am sharing, whether it is in person or not, i have showed him a real love that not everyone may understand...sad it will end this way with heart aches...
@Canellita (12058)
• United States
26 Aug 12
You are not going to know how he feels or what he thinks until you talk to him. You should let him know you regret the way you acted and see if he is willing to work things out and try again. A mature person should be able to hear you out and work through any problems.
• Thailand
28 Aug 12
I believed he refused to talk to me, actually i have found out that, during out unrelieved argument two weeks after he tried to proposed to his online best friend that was also in love with him.. He thought i was gone and he cheated me by courting with another girl which happened to become my friend online as well...
@Canellita (12058)
• United States
29 Aug 12
Wow, consider yourself lucky! He obviously was not someone who would have been loyal to you. It is hard to get past these things sometimes, but someone better is out there for you!
• Thailand
30 Aug 12
Yes, it is better to know his true color now than before i fall deeply in to his trap....
@ladygator (3469)
• United States
25 Aug 12
Your not pathetic. Everyone needs to feel loved and love someone else as well if thats what they want. Lots of people begin relationships these days online. So its not so uncommon. And if you are happy with someone its always really sad when they just leave all of the sudden with no explanation at all. When they tell you that they love you its especially hard to just break the ties.
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Yes exactly he told me that he loved me but, now where was that he left me behind without resolving the issue we have started and i have sent him a broke up note without knowing if he received it or not... i was really disappointed at the moment.:(
1 person likes this
@ladygator (3469)
• United States
26 Aug 12
Not hearing back can really be the worst! Its just left there hanging in the air on what you thought was going on. ANnd without him responding it just leaves you with no closure. He could have some problem that has kept him off line or he could have just gtten that upset about the argument. But people have arguments its natural and if he cant handle that then, its really better off to break things off.
• Thailand
19 Sep 12
I guess he is just so coward to admit that he is not a kind of guy who can take the responsibility of commitment in a relationship.
@dpk262006 (56110)
• Delhi, India
24 Sep 12
Hi! Many valuable suggestions has already been given by many mylotters on your post. I could only add that your should forget the past happenings, you can not 'undo' it now. However, you could always learn from this experience and could 'move ahead'. Life is full of ups and down and these kind of experiences teach us a lot.
• Thailand
25 Sep 12
Thank you for adding up of your point of view, i sppreciate it. I am learning to move on and i am quite happy on the present time, i wish to forget every pain i have experienced from past, in time i hope i will. Good day friend.
@dpk262006 (56110)
• Delhi, India
26 Sep 12
Hopefully, you will leave your memory past behind and will forget with the passage of time. It is good to hear that at present you are happy.
• Philippines
30 Sep 12
You should give another one more talk with him, if he still chooses NO then you should try to move on. I realized that no matter how good both of you are in a relationship, there's a 50/50 chance that you will let go or settle in. don't worry you can still find some one else out there that will date you and find it more ideal for you. but sometimes there's a difference between the ideal man and the one that would pump your heart. have a nice day
• Thailand
30 Sep 12
Exactly dear, when you have choosen someone to love and suddenly breaks your heart, it really feels like hell. I just tought that he is best among every other man who just endng up cheating me and made me cry for several times. But you are right, i must move on and am doing it now i have to keep on with m journey, one day i am sure i will see the right man for me. Thank You for your response, happy earning.
• Philippines
21 Sep 12
I, too have felt alone sometimes even if there are a lot of people surrounding me (friends, family) but whenever we have an argue with my boyfriend, I always feel alone and I really don't know why. :( in your case friend, just accept everything, if he doesn't want you anymore then that would be his loss. You are right, you should learn from that experience and make a better moves in the future :)
• Thailand
23 Sep 12
Yes, i have learned to accept things, thank you fro dropping by have a good day ahead.:)
@Shavkat (59710)
• Philippines
30 Aug 12
I feel lonely when I am not around with my friends or family. For meeting a special someone, I used to be wise and find out the real intentions. For the reason, I don't want to feel lonely and betrayed.
• Thailand
30 Aug 12
You are very strong then , emotionally that you can control it and make a good decisions... But i was not lucky to have such traits, thats why i was always failed in many things in terms of love... always took for granted....
26 Aug 12
To be honest, I have gone through what you are going through now. Do not be hard on yourself my friend. Give him some more time and space to respond back. If he does not come up with a reply well, it is none of your fault as I van say so reading your post. The most important person in this world is you to yourself and you have every reason to be happy in life.
• Thailand
28 Aug 12
Thank you for the understanding, he might not value any of my feelings right now as he was been quite for a long time....
@imAbigael (475)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Hi Gracia! Well you're not okay for now but you can get over it soon. Love maybe really complicated to understand for the questions why our feeling's are fading? We can't force a person to love you and stay for you forever but one day you can find a real man who can love you for a lifetime but it can takes time but worth the wait. I know that feeling when you fell in love online and its hard to keep guessing for the man who actually not the real man for you. For now its time to love yourself first and when you love yourself you cant feel blaming or disappointing yourself, its there problems (men) that they don't value the girls and keep hurting them like nothing. But there is always a hope when you believe in true love. :)
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
thank you do much for the response yes i am trying to set my mind into a positive outlook, he might nit be right one for me so i need to just forget what aches i have in me right now....yes men will always be men....
@freedang (320)
• China
25 Aug 12
I am so sorry to hear about that,but i dont think that man deserve you feel so sad.eh...you konw that it is impossible that each love could last forever.everyone have her heart broken experience .you should try to think something else,just like i do.hahaha....time will cure everything.someday you will find that the things that once you thinked so important just is so light. try to go out.chat with you friend,meet another love,just dont be idle.it makes you more unbearable
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
It is sad but yes you might think you said it right i must go and forget him...i was just being broken everyday thinking that he will back....:)
@mikej143 (310)
• Philippines
25 Aug 12
Rather than spending time thinking what will be your future to online relations its better to move on. 50-50 chance you could have good relationship in online it might be your need someone to hold on to rather find friends in real life and express in out in that way you could find and discover other people.
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Thank you sir, yes there will be less chance now, and we haven't spoke anymore for few weeks now.
@Jshean20 (14373)
• Canada
25 Aug 12
When love happens it happens, there is no right or wrong way to fall in love or right or wrong way to meet someone. If the feelings are strong enough and you feel in your heart it is fixable I would stay in contact but don't try to rush everything at once. I would just start by telling him what you've been thinking about and if appropriate after that, tell him how you feel.
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Thank you for the comment, i hope when the time comes its not too late already....:(
@silverfox09 (4727)
• United States
24 Aug 12
Love can come at anytime , falling out of the sky . I met my bf in a chat room never was looking for it it just happen , we really get to know each other and he is pretty hot we been together ever since.
• Thailand
25 Aug 12
Thank you mam, how i wish it could happen to me, but i guess he already left me.
• United States
24 Aug 12
My brother met his wife online and they are having the time of their lives. You should try to reach him one more time or go t where he was the last time yu saw him.
• Thailand
24 Aug 12
you mean i should keep waiting for him come back or keep in touch with him... do you mean i should not give up?
@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
24 Aug 12
I am so sorry to hear about you losing this person. But then if we come to think of it, it should have been a blessing in disguise, perhaps because when you lost your cool for a moment he has gone and left you... That means he is not ready to accept you, and everything that made who you are. We cannot always be in good terms with every one. Especially our loved ones whom we would be sharing a lot of our times together, live with the person and the first sign of an argument, he's gone missing? I think this person does not deserve you feeling so alone... as he has left you and yourself has not gone with him. always remember that. It may be just a time to feel bad, to be in this situation is not easy. it is just like many people, girls, even men or boys alike - we all have had our hearts broken... we know how it is but we know eventually we would be able to accept it anyway. right? Just take time but keep your self busy and occupied so that you do not think of this person all the time. Eventually you would be able to forget him and you know for sure that it did not work out with this person who left because you deserve someone better.
• Thailand
24 Aug 12
That feels good, i appreciate your great comment... it is true that people suddenly change and feeling changes, and i guess the emotions he felt for me before was't exactly love...as i have for him... because if we love someone , no matter how hard the situation of arguments is they will not think to leave you that long f he still has heart aches with me. I just felt rejected and so i need to move on now.
@TheIzers (680)
24 Aug 12
I don't think you are pathetic especially today the way internet connects to people I can say love someone in internet is normal. I have two friends who met their spouse on internet and they make great couple both of them has children now. I am sorry that he left you but hopefully time will heal your pain. I think you just need some time and talk to other people and have fun conversation while online and it might help you to ease the pain. wish you luck
• Thailand
24 Aug 12
thank you for the great comment, i am now just spending my time on my online activities and sad that i have a bitterness not to entertain any other guys to come in my life anymore. Not after my Bad Experiences....
@djalex14 (195)
• Canada
24 Aug 12
Hi.I just think online dating is not working or maybe works to some people....Is very good to chat a person but to fall in love to him online is patetic.Everybody has their own decisions.Good luck!
• Thailand
24 Aug 12
Yes, i was expecting that kind of reaction as all of us has it's own view for everything... i would have to change my self from now...on...
@HomeBase (1054)
• United States
24 Aug 12
First of all you cannot be too hard on yourself, we all want to love and to be IN love, that is natural. You write like all the bad stuff was YOUR fault and all the good stuff came from HIM. You have to make sure that you love and respect YOURSELF. He was NOT perfect, he is JUST a man. Just calm down and try to get to know the guy MORE if and when he contacts you again. Give him some space, stop emailing him all the time!!! Leave him alone for awhile, and if he wants to talk to you then let HIM get in touch with YOU.
• Thailand
24 Aug 12
Oh, you just perfectly said the whole truth, i was actually doing it now... i have stopped sending messages to him and its quite few weeks now... i believe it would be better if he will not hear anything from me anymore.
@ahdorg (32)
• Bhutan
24 Aug 12
You will now the real person only when you meet him/her personally. I don't think love online will success. Only when you are really desperate to have some love u should search for your love online. Ofcourse I have a friend that meet his soulmate online. But it is very rare. Hope you can b among that rare. Cheer your life anyway.
• Thailand
24 Aug 12
I thought he is an ideal for me , if not the perfect one... but sad that he doesn't come back to talk with me anymore.