Imaginary friend

@bingskee (5238)
Philippines
September 26, 2012 10:40am CST
The other day, there was news about the benefits for your little children to have an imaginary friend. The little child that was interviewed called his imaginary friends "Shalani" and "Willie". The mom said they just listen. An expert said that most children his age (from 3 years old) has an imaginary friend. Parents should not encourage it, meaning that they should not let their children feel that the imaginary friend is real. Did you have one? I do not remember having one but my son may have one when he was young. He seemed talking to someone when he was four.
3 people like this
17 responses
@shaqziad (655)
• Malaysia
27 Sep 12
I do. There's two of them. The name's secret. I realize i made/imagine them based on my real friends, but with characteristic that i prefer. I didn't really talk to that imaginary friends. I just imagine they are here, how they act. Like when i cook, i imagine them beside me criticizing my curry, and so on. Did i sounds scary? Well, you are the one raising this topic.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
28 Sep 12
no, i don't think this is scary. the first person that should be scared about this imaginary friend thing should be you. if this happens mostly to kids, it sounds okay, but for an adult, i think there is more to it than just being a kid growing, learning and observing.
@shaqziad (655)
• Malaysia
28 Sep 12
Oh, don't worry, i'm not scared at all. thanks for not freaking out. i think as long as i know the boundary between reality and fantasy, it's okay. By the way, i still consider myself as a child inside.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
29 Sep 12
that's good to know.
@visavis (5945)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
Sometimes children like that which they always talking when they are alone. But the reality is here like here in mylot we are chatting to someone we didnot seen which some of us here using imaginary avatar. like not real picture... but we call it them friends...
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
true...
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
5 Oct 12
oh, i looked at the response differently. i do not see mylotters with avatars as imaginary friends. it's their choice and i do not question them. after all, what is important is the interaction.
@dawnald (84129)
• Shingle Springs, California
26 Sep 12
I didn't have one when I was little. In High School we made up voices. Mine was Russell the troll, but I didn't believe he was real.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
26 Sep 12
i don't remember having one, too, dawn. though i don't know if my parents saw me talking to an imaginary friend.
• India
27 Sep 12
Even I never had an imaginary friend. But I did have the habit of talking to myself looking at the mirror. it was infact the kind of stress relief i needed in those days. Since I was the lone kid of my parents, I didnt really have anybody to share the feelings. SO i though why not tell myself.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
i think there is nothing wrong with it, varun. i had had moments, too, when i talked to myself.
@thesids (22455)
• Bhubaneswar, India
26 Sep 12
Dear Ms bingskee I have one today at 38 The fact that I am to stay all alone in that house with almost no one to talk to... I think it is sometimes good to stand up in front of some mirror and start chatting with my ownself about how weak I have become and things like this... but nothing beyond. and that too happens once in many months... I know if it became a habit the landlady would think I have gone insane
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
26 Sep 12
you do???? well, i think i do talk to myself at times, it's like scolding myself for being stubborn, for example. but i do not have an imaginary friend! that could be scary ha ha
@enelym001 (8333)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
godson Me too!!! LoL! Even at this old age, I still talk to myself in front of the mirror. Especially when I feel a bit sad. Telling myself to cheer up and to believe that things I want will happen. So this talking to ourselves is pretty normal.
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
26 Sep 12
I don't remember having one and my parents never mentioned it. However, my oldest daughter did have one.She was almost reaching two years old when this started. She actually named her "Easy" and I played along with her. I didn't want her to feel different or alone for that matter. So I would set the table for the three of us. She would say becareful mom you are going to sit on her. She would play with her dolls as if "Easy" was there playing with her. When her baby sister was born when she was now 2 1/2 that is when "Easy" disappeared never to be heard of again.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
26 Sep 12
the child shown on the tv show also said those words. he seemed to have been talking to a person. Easy - that's a nice name for an imaginary friend.
1 person likes this
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
27 Sep 12
I wondered after my second daughter was born if she was the spirit of my oldest daughters imaginary friend.
@enelym001 (8333)
• Philippines
26 Sep 12
Hi bingskee.. that was pretty scary. If I have a child I would not let him have an imaginary friend too. I don't think it is healthy enough for a kid to talk to himself or an imaginary friend. Although there were times when I was little that I used to talk to someone too but that's just like talking to myself too. And I don't do it everyday. ;)
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
26 Sep 12
i know, but the experts said parents do not have to worry. it will past. it can help the child cope with situations where he cannot be allowed to play outside because it's raining, for example. in short, it helps a child deal with depression or disappointment. the child shown as example on tv really talks to an imaginary friend while he was playing. he seems like a healthy child, and a smart one, too.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
*it will pass IS WHAT I MEAN.
@inertia4 (26582)
• United States
26 Sep 12
I honestly do not remember having an imaginary friend. Although who knows. I do remember me being my best friend. I would use my imagination to play, but not with an invisible person. I sometimes still think that I am still my best friend.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
26 Sep 12
me, myself and i! i remember talking to myself a lot when i was young.
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (26582)
• United States
12 Oct 12
I think people talk to themselves all the time. And I don't mean in public, I mean in private. We sometimes verbalize our thoughts to ourselves to get things organized. I see nothing wrong with that.
@dorannmwin (36608)
• United States
28 Sep 12
I don't remember having an imaginary friend when I was a little girl and I don't remember Kathryn having an imaginary friend either. However, Paul had an imaginary friend that was a part of his life for about two years. He called him Tommy and Tommy was always there playing with him. The last time that I heard from Tommy was when he was walking into school with Paul on his first day of kindergarten and I haven't heard about him since. I guess Paul decided to leave him at school when he started.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
28 Sep 12
i don't know why but i find Paul and Tommy's story cute.
• Netherlands
27 Sep 12
I remember something about an imaginary friend when i was younger..... but that lasted not even 1 hour xD! My father explaind to me that this imaginary friend did not exist so could not be real and that it would be much more fun to find a real friend! Which i did.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
28 Sep 12
that's funny! first time to hear about an episode that only lasted an hour.
27 Sep 12
I don't remember having an imaginary friend in my childhood. But i notice with kids that when they play alone they seem to be talking with someone and it seems normal to their age. I mean, these kids really have a great imagination but as they grow old they seem to outgrow it. It must have been a phase a child goes through, i'm not sure.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
28 Sep 12
i also think it's a phase that children go through. some of them made sounds with talking and some just let their imagination go free without talking. my son, when he was a kid, has had many imagination scenes but he does it with hand actions not talking.
• India
27 Sep 12
I too have heard many stories like that and I completely agree with about not encouraging the same.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
28 Sep 12
are the stories yours or theirs?
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
I don't think I had one when I was a child. My mom would also discourage me to talk to myself when I was alone.I used to play with my barbie dolls and I would pretend that they were talking to each other. I don't think I would encourage my child to have an imaginary friend,I would rather let write her own diary where she can express her feelings. I think this is also healthy.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
28 Sep 12
my tendency would be to discourage my children, too,when they were young, if i observe that they are talking most of the time to an imaginary friend. if one hasn't heard yet about imaginary friends, it would be truly scary.
• India
27 Sep 12
Hmmm imaginary friend.......what is the necessity to have an imaginary friend. I don't think it is necessary. It like giving an fallacy to an small kid which could bring about disastrous repercussion in the future in the mind and behaviour of the child. It absolutely an unnecessary proposition as far as i am concerned
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
it's not proposed, it's happening. the issue here is if it's healthy or not. the experts were telling it is healthy and could help children deal with stressful situations, and also develop confidence.
• India
27 Sep 12
Talking to an Imaginary friend really appears weird to me. The problem is such concepts can really take ur kids to psychotic problems in extreme cases. They just initially pretend that there is someone like that and finally they would start believing in them. Once they start believing, then it would be hard to pull them back. Its better not to plug in some unwanted notions in our kids minds.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
they will start believing if they're encouraged it's true.by this, the experts say, a parent must not be involving himself and talking also to the imaginary friend as if they really exist. a parent must not also openly discuss about them most of the time as if giving them the notion, as you said, that is not really necessary for the kid's mind.
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
Honestly, I have not only one. I have 7 of them. I am 20 years old now. I still have 3. I am not ashamed of it. I don't know if I am crazy but they helped me in some point of time in life when I need to talk to someone and let my ideas to wild. I think, this imaginary friend thing is really beneficial, not some bad thing happening. It gives creativity and happiness when some real people is not around. :)
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
oh, seven. i think it's ok as long as you do not let them through you believing in yourself that they are you. that would be another story.
@Porcospino (16435)
• Denmark
26 Sep 12
I had a couple of imaginary friends when I was a child. One of those friends was a girl called Trine and I often played with her and made up stories about her. I had another imaginary friend called a Bactus and he was a character from the book that I had read. My father has told me about one experience from my childhood. I don't remember the experience myself because I was only a few years old when it happened. One day my father and I were in the car and I told my father that we had forgotten Bactus and that we had to drive back and pick him up. At first my father refused, but he got tired of hearing about it, so he decided to drive back to place where we were 5 minutes earlier and "pick up" my imaginary friend. We got back and he opened the door and said: "All right Bactus, get in the car" and then we left. The other drivers probably thought that he was crazy
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
poor father! but he loves you very much that he cannot disappoint you. i find that the names given are intriguing. most of the time, i think, that these imaginary friends are people or personalities that children gets accustomed to.
1 person likes this
@sender621 (14956)
• United States
26 Sep 12
I was the first sibling born into my family. so i was alone for a dew years and there were not any children my age to play with in the neighborhood so i made an imaginary friend as well. sometimes that imaginary friend saw me through some hard and lonesone days and i am not ashamed to have had that imaginary froiend in my life and I would not try to shame another oerson from having an imaginary friend either.
@bingskee (5238)
• Philippines
27 Sep 12
very true, sender621. nothing to be ashamed of. as the experts say, it's a healthy way of coping with life.