Did feminism kill chivalry?

Then the answer is yes bagarad. Because a few women think it is beneath them to be treated like ladies , All females are suppose to hate chivalry. Wow! Am I glad I am not a feminist! Am I glad I live in the south where where there are still gentlemen. See I do not see a man treating me like a lady as him assuming I am weak, in fact it is the opposite. He is honoring the power All women have. Plus the one thing a man can Still do , even if he is dating a feminist, is protect her. True there is no garbage for her to dodge but there are cars that could skip a curb. If his women is in front of him , he can keep an eye out . But if this lady wants to go out on her own, demean a true gentleman for doing the right thing it is her right. But just make sure she clearly says this goes for her and not all of us.

Some people, very few these days, will say old habits die hard. But we do live in a world where women are now equals. They fought for equal rights and won. Like I said before, I grew up at the cusp of the main change. Where women were beginning to become independent but yet wanted that man, the one with manners to still be there. As well as a man to love honor and protect. These days women do see things a whole lot different. Some men treat them as equals. I still believe that this bothers women. In a nut shell, I see it that women want their cake and eat it to. We do see the changes, relationships do not last long, true love seems to be a thing of the past and marriage, well, that is becoming a memory. I believe we should stop with any bull and just be ourselves. What do we all have to lose/ Nothing. I am myself with T and she is herself with me. We care for each other in our own crazy way.

I don't think this sort of woman sees this as weakness in a man as much as she sees it as power struggle. These courtesies had practical meanings when they began to be practiced. Those meanings are now, for the most part, obsolete. People don't throw garbage out the window anymore, so a woman walking on the outside wouldn't get hit. She is no longer being protected by these practices, but she is being recognized as a woman. The problem is, she doesn't want to be recognized this way. She wants to be considered equal with or even dominant to men. She sees special treatment as a woman as soem sort of threat to feeling equal. She thinks the man is considering her too weak to do these things for herself. She sees an attitude of courtesy as a direct assault on her sense of being in control and powerful as the man. She is out to prove something. So she reacts negatively towards the unlucky man who was just trying to use what were always taught as good manners and he wonders what on earth he did to provoke such wrath. Poor guy. This hit when I was in college and it left a lot of confusion in dating. Men had no idea what they were supposed to do because they didn't know what the woman was expecting. The women who were used to having the man open the car door wasn't sure if she should sit and wait or just get out. Maybe men could have asked if the woman would mind if he opened the door for her so they could clear up the confusion before the awkwardness occurred. I always appreciated it, myself, since those car doors can be really heavy.

She is amazing! Sugar is going to be a wonderful young woman, just like her mama!

Thanks.

You are special.To Hubby you are The only woman on the planet for him. He better make you feel like a queen! when I guy lets me get on the bus before him , or steps aside so I can walk through the door I Always say thank you.

But he doesn't do it "every time" I wonder if it is because if he didn't so often that I notice it more? You know, like if he did it too much, maybe I'd take it for granted?

Me too. The one time I enjoyed was when I held the door for a cop. You should have seen the surprise on his face!

All the men in my life have been chivalrous towards me despite the fact that many a time I did excel in whatever I handled. I was good in managing finances a portfolio that is considered to be a man's prerogative. I was never suppressed and yet they were always there to 'open the door' or to 'carry my luggage'!

I like chivalry too..lol. Working together would certainly get alot more accomplished.

You mean by a guy being courteous makes you feel delicate? Why? It makes me feel special. It shows that I have more power than any man! I guess I will Never be a feminist.

When I grew up man bashing was women's second favorite past time. So I wouldn't blame a guy one bit if he pretended to be clueless. I will Never see women as equal to men. Women have always had the upper hand and nothings has changed. As long as there are straight men, women will rule!

I do not agree.Men still will protect the women. They will still profess their love for the one they love.True they can't have duels but the feelings are still there. The only "passive"men I know of have been married for many years. They are trained to just say " yes dear" and do nothing else, lol.

My dear Bagarad, you have that grey hair. A guy who would ignore his date would help you. Respecting you elders is in effect. I'm here in Northern VA and I do get guys who will let me get on the bus first. And we, both genders, hold doors for each other. But it is rare to have a guy to give me his seat on the bus.

Sarah, I haven't taken an ordinary bus for 12 years. Even then, it was a long Greyhound ride, and there was no problem with seats. I haven't lived in cities with public bus transportation since I was in my thirties. I can tell you that my husband always gave up his seat when he was in college and a young adult, and he will still give his seat to any lady without one. The only time he didn't was when he was on crutches before his hip surgery and he was in his sixties.

I have never lived in a city without bus service. Your Hubby is a real gentleman!