"who is a good person"

@prashu228 (25614)
India
September 28, 2012 10:32am CST
hello friends, I wonder ,what could be the qualities of a good person.How should a good person behave? Do you say a person is good, because he/she helps you in all possible ways or obeys what ever you say. If he/she disobeys you or stops helping you, does it mean that the person is bad? I have seen such people , they praise the people when they listen to them or help them, but once the other person starts giving their own views or disobeys ,or doesn't help for some reasons,then the same person who praised them may /will start calling them bad person . How can this be possible? friends please your views and your experiences.
2 people like this
15 responses
@ravisivan (14055)
• India
28 Sep 12
prashu: it is very much possible. as long as one listens to you, you will be close with him/her and share your ideas/thoughts/expressions/feelings. But when he starts objecting I am sure you will stop talking to him. In this case if you are able to reason out that that person is objecting only my comment/activity then you may continue the relationship. In the reverse case where you are not agreeing with another person -- he may decide to stop his contacts with you. In the case of pets -- they will move closely with the people who care for it, who feed it and not with people who disregard it or beat it.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
28 Sep 12
hmm. i understand but immediately how can people change like that?if they don't listen to us, how can he become bad immediately.
1 person likes this
@ravisivan (14055)
• India
28 Sep 12
PRASHU Yes. It can happen at a stroke of moment. I think you must have seen movie "Muthu" -- where Rajanikanth who was respected by all was put into disgrace in a short time. Many movies, many incidents have proved this. I have known a rich man who was ill treating his parents was again ill treated by his children after a few years. We get what we deserve in this life itself. I am not surprised in people changing. For example if a person's attempt comes out successful everybody will praise him. On the contrary in spite of his hard work if his attempts fail, he will be looked down upon.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
yes, i agree. Especially regarding parents and children. Yes the person i looked down, if he fails and vice versa, may be its human mentality ,we make decisions or come to conclusions about other people at the wink of an eye. Though its not right at all. Its not that we don't realize, but it just happens. may be that's human life.
@ladym33 (11008)
• United States
28 Sep 12
I think a good person is a person who helps out when they can, and does the best they can towards other people. But I think even good people have their limits. Even good people get a point where they feel they are being taken advantage of and then have to refuse. There also comes a point when helping others can be difficult on that good person and that good person's family and then they just have to say no.
1 person likes this
@dainy1313 (2354)
• Leon, Mexico
29 Sep 12
Hi ladym33, this is my point of view too. I think we all have bad and good things, all of us. But the good heart is known by the way they help other people, without interest. And good people have values like love, loyalty, trust, truth, commitment, kindness, charity, politeness. Blessings ladym33... dainy
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
i agree , a good person is defined by all these things. Of course they too have the limits, people should not judge them and give them the label"bad" if they stop helping. as they are also human beings like us, and have certain limits and cannot be always only on the helping side.
@roshigo58 (4871)
• Pune, India
1 Oct 12
Hi, You are right. we think person is good who helps you, listen to you, never insults you. When someone someone behaves reverse to it we consider him as bad person. But it is not always right. Sometimes someone doesn't helps you because he has some reason. We should try to understand the reason behind it and then come to conclusion whether he is good or bad.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
1 Oct 12
yes, indeed many people act to be good in front of us, but such people talk something else on our back, all may not e a a positon to help us all the time so we should not mistake them
@marguicha (100028)
• Chile
28 Sep 12
I would say that in order for a person to be good, he must have sevral qualities. I`d say he would have to be generous, respectful, understanding, tolerant. I don`t think this has to do with his helping or not helping me. It would depend on what I`m asking of him.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
superb explanation, but unfortunately people see if they get any help or profit from us most of the time ,i guess, they decide basing on the same.
@WakeUpKitty (8706)
• Netherlands
28 Sep 12
A good person to me is someone who is good and honest to me in every way. If it comes to that I don't care about the past of that person or how he/she is treating others. If I want someone who obeys me I will take a slave.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
thats completely, a different view you showed, and i dont say its bad either, everyone has their opinions.
@HomeBase (1054)
• United States
28 Sep 12
Well, if a person only praises someone or calls them "good" when that someone is agreeing with them, then that is not a real friendship or relationship, that is a dictatorship. I have seen that type of thing before. It takes place when a person with a "strong" personality is trying to control a person with a "weak" personality...or it takes place when a person with a weak personality is trying to control someone with a strong personality. Either way it is all about trying to control someone. Trying to make someone do what the would-be controller wants them to do, either by handing out or by with-holding praise. If one does not say things that the controller 'approves' of, then that person is called a 'bad person' by the would-be controller. When a person first realizes that someone only praises them if they agree with them, it is up to that person to not deal with that fake person so much anymore. Or, just cut the fake person off altogether. When we realize that we are dealing with a phony person, that is to say a person who really does not like us and therefore starts to bad-mouth us the minute that we feel like expressing the fact that we too have a brain and some intelligence, then it is time to back away from that 'friendship'.
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
yes, relationship based on praising and only helping is not real for sure, they only be with the person because they get some free work done. As long as the two people control each other,they only think of the help they get from one another and not on real relationship. i agree with all your points.
@alberello (4755)
• Italy
28 Sep 12
Well, this argument from you discussed in your thread, it is very delicate. A good person is in my opinion the one who helps, who obeys you, but also the one who knows how to blame when you're wrong (of course all with good manners). Let us take the example of a child, parents must be able to be good not making him miss anything, but they must also know to distinguish what is right from what is wrong. So you can do a lot of examples. So to get to the point in the speech, if a person with you has always been good but you get yelled at for something that according to him / her was not right, do not "turn card" immediately and judge bad. This is my point of view.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
i liked your example and its absolutely true. we should not blame the person immediately, we should analyse the situation.
@challs12 (549)
• Malaysia
29 Sep 12
Ask yourself, did you think your mom or dad is a good person? I believe your answer must be yes, and so do I. Did you ever being scolded by your mom or dad, or disagree with some idea? I believe your answer must be yes, so do I. But then, why still we say our mom and dad a good person? Simply because they much cares, loves, raising us, educating us and many more reasons. But why we still say so though we always have disagreement and being scolded by them? Because their good to us is more that what they scold us and they are right scolding us to make us a good person as them. Back to your example. In my opinion, the example you gave above clearly shows us that the person whom praise people only when people help or agree with him is the one that is not a good person. Clearly he praise people to get reward and not sincere. Actually this is a bad attitude. Why must we push people to being good to us or helping us or agreed with us? Everybody has their own opinion and beliefs. That's how I look about your example.
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
so nice, yes of course ,parents are definitely good. But we cant compare parents with friends or anyone else. yes there are people who purely see if they get any profit ,if they be with the other person, now they cant be called as good ,indeed. we have to be careful in selecting friends ,and see as to, what is their priority in being with us.
@challs12 (549)
• Malaysia
29 Sep 12
Yes that's right prashu, parent are incomparable. But they are our best example to be a good person. Even though we are naughty, disobey their words, being bad, but still they take care and good to us. So when we meet people whose being good to us with purpose, we should try to avoid them softly. Like you said, we have to be really careful selecting friend, most of people must have purpose for being good to us or at least we are not harm them in any way, material or physical. But most people close to us ( I mean other than family ) is because of materiality, but they don't really want our money, but just enough if we don't ask their money.
@ryanong (9694)
• Vietnam
29 Sep 12
Umh..i am not very good but not bad person also. sometime i can help the others, but not always because i can't, and for sure i don't do harm anyone.
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
lol , as long as we don't harm anyone we are good ,i guess
@ryanong (9694)
• Vietnam
2 Oct 12
yeah, a person who has a good heart is a good guy. why not?
@kongno (431)
• Philippines
30 Sep 12
in my opinion a good person is the one that do not not disturb hurt or do something bad to his/her fellow, and the person who is always helping his/her fellow is better than a good person, a good person don't do things that are bad, and a better person also don't do things that are bad but at the same time he/she is doing things that are good.
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
30 Sep 12
you answered it very logically, well everyone has their point of view.
1 person likes this
• India
29 Sep 12
These days , the qualities of a good person is really to keep their mouth shut! Do anything people shall Criticise you anyway! Do not interfere in anyone else problem , care less , smile always , live your life yourself, you shall be called good person!
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
30 Sep 12
haha, good one , in fact people are like that, around us, so will be good to follow your point.
@Hamidzeb (88)
29 Sep 12
I think behave well and mannerly with all people either that person is rich or poor,puts you in the list of good person....
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
yes but mostly people see ,all these when they makes friends, being rich or poor does matter to many.
• Bangladesh
29 Sep 12
I should not skip saying while helping them that Im not able help them more than this time. I wont let them addicted to me. Because I wont be able to afford them some day. Rather If we can we'll help them tobe self employed. We should not expect anything for help from them.
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
i agree, it becomes a habit and the person starts depending on us so much ,that one day if we stop he can abuse us, so its better make them employed.
@natliegleb (5184)
• India
29 Sep 12
see based on these factors i dont think it would be right to appreciate a person,it all depends on the way how well we care for each other and also keep helping others forever makes a person good or bad
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
yes, but unfortunately people do call us good only if we are useful to them.
@Pose123 (21667)
• Canada
28 Sep 12
Hi prashu, A good discussion! I hope that lots of people respond. I have felt for a long time that people are not good and bad but just different. I agree with you and have seen many people like you describe. A person is good as long as he or she agrees with everything they say or helps them whenever they can. What is good and bad anyway? Doesn't it depend on how we look at things? What's considered good by one might be considered the opposite by another. Blessings.
@prashu228 (25614)
• India
29 Sep 12
yes, it depends on us, sometimes i too think what is exactly meant by good and bad. Its our definitions. and still thinking but no answer yet. may be as long as we are good to others we are good , is this true? oh no ,same stuff again . A person who is termed/labelled as "good" for years , can he become bad ,only just because he is not agreeing to our terms all of a sudden. oh my ,this is so tricky,isn't. It all depends on how we see things ,like how Alberello our friend said in the above.