bond among friends

Indonesia
September 30, 2012 4:30am CST
when I have new friend, I always think, "can I be her/his best friend?". And after we were become 'friend' status, I found that she/he better than me in school lesson. to be honest, I don't like people have higher score than me in school lesson. especially knowing that she/he is my new friend. I feel like I'm a loser. I was starting dislike her/him because of that. but now, I can understand that I were wrong dislike or hate she/he for the reason "better than me". it's just need new mind set becoming a friend with someone. it doesn't matter if she/he better than you at some points. it's easier to say "congrats" than dislike her/him. I feel more comfortable to facing my new friend now because this new mind set. it's same with my other friends too. are anyone of you ever facing this kind of situation too? :)
1 person likes this
10 responses
@celticeagle (114256)
• Boise, Idaho
30 Sep 12
Friendships are like any relationships they take work and nurturing. If you are mad at someone for getting a higher score on a test then you need to do some growing. And why not utilize that friendship and her knowledge to do better on your next test.
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
I think you're right. I will improve my attitude. Hehe, thanks for your advice! :D
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (114256)
• Boise, Idaho
1 Oct 12
I think so too. Hope things go better.
@sergedan (768)
• Romania
1 Oct 12
No, I don't feel envy of others. There is no need to because I am the best.
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
you're right. I have a bad attitude and I want to change it. Thank you for your advice! :)
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
30 Sep 12
hi elizabethis, this mind set maybe attributed to your age or just not having a lot of experiences of real friends. You should know that as your life evolve you will meet many more people who appear to know more than you either from schooling or experience...but believe me , think of everyone you meet are in a position to teach you something..sometimes good to help you follow the right road in life and some not so good to make you aware of the road not to follow.. There will always be someone smarter, prettier, more money just know who you are and remember anything you want is worth going for in life///set your goals and keep you eye on the sparrow...
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
yeah, you're right. I was being selfish. I want to change and I want to have a lot of friends. I really have bad attitude before I realize the real important thing about friendship. it is not about compete someone. I should accept them as they are. Thank you for your advice! :)
• Greece
30 Sep 12
If a friend proves to be more clever than you are then you ought to take it as a compliment - they have chosen you to be their friend too. So you must have something interesting and they are clever enough to realise that. So enjoy your clever friends and make a point of cultivating nice ones. The people we have around us reflect the kind of person we are or would like to become. Friendship is not a competitive relationship, it is a shared one. I've learned a lot from clever friends. As a confident type of person I think it is good for me to have a few friends who I know are better than I am in one way or another. Provided the friend is a real friend and doesn't try to make me feel inferior I think their friendship is something I can enjoy and value.
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
thank you for understand me. I know I was wrong, and I will not going to be like that again. thank you for your advice! :)
• Philippines
30 Sep 12
Different people from different places,,meaning we have our own personalities, but thats only a part of growing up....Insecurities and comparison are both negatives and should be avoided or change as much as possible... When choosing a friend, you must consider him/her as yourself and accept him/her the way she/he is... don't compare and don't compete, instead support and pray for each other to grow the friendship in a way it should be.
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
thank you for your advice. I will change that kind of attitude. :D
• India
30 Sep 12
Basically education has nothing to do with friendship! A friend should not be valued for his education! your value for friendship is not when you are with old friends around your back to support you , it is tested when you are with a new friend!Attitude matters!
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
thank you for open minded with my problem. yeah, I think you're right. friendship is not about compete with someone. your comment make me understand more about friendship matter, thank you so much!
• Philippines
30 Sep 12
In High School years, I remember during our lesson, we discussed the meaning of friendship. I cannot completely recall the exact definition word for word based on the text book but to put it into words it ran along the lines of "friendship is an intangible thing, it completely surrounds a person, taking him in with all his good points and all his bad, enveloping him in his entirety". To be a good friend, you've to posses the ability of acceptance of ones personality, acceptance of yourself, your strengths and your limitations and understanding others flaws as well as yours and appreciation of the outcome that friendship may generate. May you be able to find true friends who'll make you feel good and valued:D
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
maybe I'm too proud of myself and making me become so selfish. I should improve my attitude. thank you so much!
@WakeUpKitty (8711)
• Netherlands
30 Sep 12
I think you have low self esteem since you don't like the fact anyone might be better as you are. You will have a very hard life ahead if you don't work on yourself. A good/close friend can be anyone and has nothing to do with competition. Also I think it's weird your first thought if you meet someone is: can I be her/his best friend. You never will this way since you only like best friends who are not as "great" as you are, who make you feel great or look better. You are not able to respect or accept people for what they are. No matter if they are better or worser as you are. If you can't do that, why should anyone else do that to you? Why should anyone else want to be your best friend? Ever thought about that?
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
I think I should start to think about it. you're right, I should more esteem and respect other people. I really appreciate your advice to me. Thanks a lot! :)
• Philippines
30 Sep 12
hi elizabeth, Well I don't have this kind of feelings towards person or friends Actually my friends are better than me when it comes to academic status but I don't feel that way but I am proud that I have a friend like them. happy mylotting
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
thank you for your comment. I should think that way too. :D
@kokomo (1868)
• Philippines
30 Sep 12
I think the term for that kind of attitude is insecurities.That's bad girl. For me,I'd better be with a friend who are witty than me because from them I can acquire new knowledge that I do not know.I felt blessed for I gained a lot of intelligent friends.
• Indonesia
1 Oct 12
you're right, I was wrong at that time. I felt bad to my friend. and now, by learning from the past, I will improve my attitude. By the way, thanks for your comment! :)