Is marrying at your early 20s worth it?

@ellebj (784)
Philippines
October 9, 2012 9:26pm CST
As we all know, marriage means a lifetime commitment and would entail building a family. Though I am not surprise that people get marry at a young age because of love, but now, I can't see myself having my last name changed at this age. Will it be ok? I want to be with my boyfriend and sleep beside him every night. We can't do that if we will not get marry.. More so, I want to stay with him, but Im still afraid of the future. When do you think is the best age for marriage?
5 people like this
32 responses
@rafiholmes (2897)
• Malaysia
10 Oct 12
sometimes it works well..sometimes it doesnt.. people from 19th century can get married even younger than that and doesnt caused any problem in their married life and family life..its just probably atitude of individuals and couples towards the marriage in itself..
1 person likes this
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
11 Oct 12
You are right with that.. It all depends On the couples and if you learn to adjust and love your differences.
• Malaysia
11 Oct 12
yes,,, true Ellebj... its all up to the couples..how much they really wanna be with each other etc.. even if married after 40s..if their mindset is still like a slack teenagers..they will still have a horrible married life..fast to divorcing.
@babyeve (1051)
• Seychelles
10 Oct 12
Yes I believe it is not worth it. Marriage a serious thing and it requires time to finally decide if one should go ahead with it. Much more when you are around 20 you are at the stage of experiencing things that you have always dreamt of doing while growing up. Do not be afraid of the future, look at the future in a positive manner and let the future take care of itself.
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
Thanks a lot with this babyeve, because I am confused with he future.. I don't know but I don't think that people around me would agree to every decision I made..
1 person likes this
@babyeve (1051)
• Seychelles
11 Oct 12
You don't live for others Dear, you live for yourself. Their opinions does not matter at all. Do what you want to do or better do everything that you feel will make you happy. We all have our own path to follow.
• Lenox, Georgia
10 Oct 12
I really don't think there is a certain good age to get married at. As long as your both mature enough to know it is a LIFETIME committment than any age that is good for you! I got married at 20 years old and that was almost 8 years ago and my husband and I are still very much in love and going strong together! =) No matter what we go through we stick together, we are a team. You should go into marriage thinking it is a forever thing, not a right now thing. If you do that, you should be fine as long as your really in love and want to make it work!
1 person likes this
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
I agree with you here as I agree with everyones comment. I think I am with the right man, because he is really a husband factor. I just hope everything would be fine when we decide to get marry at the age we want..
1 person likes this
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
And I commend your marriage.. You are one lucky persOn.. :)
1 person likes this
@aritahime (221)
• Indonesia
10 Oct 12
well, in my opinion it's not about the age. I think it's more about whether you are ready or not to take the responsibility as a wife or a husband and also as the parents for your future children. Some people also decide to get married when they are financially stable. Just like my boyfriend, he doesn't want to get married this soon, because he calculate everything that we will probably need for the life after the marriage. But, for women like us both, we have our 'deadline' because we someday have to deliver a baby, and if we're to old, it will be very risky, won't it? ^^
1 person likes this
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
Yes I agree with you.. We have to deliver a child and our healthy deadlines are the issue here. Girls have many things to Consider than of the guys..
1 person likes this
@pahak627 (4300)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
I guess mid20's is ideal. I married at 20 and I was not actually ready. Good that I have kind and generous parents, they were the ones paying my school fees even if I was already married. My husband has been a stay at home dad for a long time already. He is not fortunate enough to find a good job for him.
1 person likes this
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
Sorry to hear about your husband, but I guess you are happy with him despite of the Financial issue.. You are also fortunate with your parents to give you what you need.. Maybe your husband lacks confidence to get a regular job.. He would get it in no time if he would really try hard to one..
1 person likes this
@mohkanari (1957)
• India
10 Oct 12
In my experience better percentage of girls married between the age of 20 to 25 are found having stable and satisfied married life. It seems upto 20 years is growth period mentally or physically. Normally after 25 is considered a bit or more delayed.
1 person likes this
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
That's new to me.. I was expecting that people would want it in their late 20s.. But I really I've the idea of marrying at early 20.. Other than being young when your children gets older, you could even enjoy more of your retirement when they got older and find money of their own..
1 person likes this
@aejey322 (1006)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
As long as you are physically, emotionally, spiritually ready, there's nothing wrong with marrying at an early age. I am not speaking for myself, because I got married late at 32. But the advantage I see for marrying early as well as having a child early, is that you can still enjoy your kids' teenage years. If you're marrying say at 23, got a baby on the 24th, then when you kid reached 18, you are still young at 42. You can still go out with them, spend nice time with them. I am not saying that the old parents cannot... but you know, there is really a big difference. When my son reaches 18, I will already be 51 I just hope I can still be as energetic as I am now so I can still go along with what's new on their generation.
@ellebj (784)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
Hope I am allowed to get marry at 24.. I was looking forward to that. Hopefully my parents are that open minded.. This is how frustrating life is.. Now that you are working and have money you still have to think about your family which you cannot enjoy your Own money..
1 person likes this
@cupkitties (7579)
• United States
10 Oct 12
That all depends on you because no one person will have the same experience. I was married at 21. Married the wrong person because I'd grown up in a very sheltered life and the only thing I ever learned about boys from my parents was well. very confusing to say the least., "If a boy ever asks you to marry him, break up with him. The engagement ring is mean to enslave you!"
1 person likes this
@Masihi (4409)
• Canada
10 Oct 12
I got married when I was 23 years old, Hubby was 36 years old, it was different for us but all in all we both had commitment in mind, no matter what happened. Forward 11 years we've gotten though a lot of hurdles and gut-wrenching times and it actually brought us closer than we were 12 years ago. Our marriage is founded on trust, dedication, a pure love - the kind that you'll do anything for the other person kind of love, and now kids. We will never rip apart our family because of our own wants, we'll be there with our kids through it all. We do lots of family time stuff, and we've even had people tell us how surprised we were that we spend so much time with our kids. We didn't try to do that, it just came natural to us, our family *IS* our life. We're inseperable.
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
10 Oct 12
Before your mid twenties is the best age to get married. I cannot say the youngest but suppose it would be seventeen. The reason is that once you go pat mood 20s, your chances of pregnancy decrease and of course, there is chance of pregnancy complications increasing. Of course you are afraid of the future. You probably heard of those who slept together and then as soon as they got married, it lasted only a few years and they broke up even though they had been together for ten or more years. Marriage brings a lot of responsibilities, and you have to get over the mindset of no responsibility, going to work, not having to account for anything, your money is yours and his money is his. He likes football, you like baseball (these are examples) but when you get married, you have to maybe give up your desire to go to a baseball game or visa versa because you cannot afford both.
@wolfie34 (26792)
• United Kingdom
10 Oct 12
In these uncertain times I say grab every happiness you can and if you feel in your heart of hearts that he is the 'one' then it doesn't matter how old you are, you don't get many opportunities in this life to find someone really special. Is he your soulmate? Could you envisage spending the rest of your life with him? I know of people who have married in their late teens and are still happily married, and yet I know of people who have waited till their in their 30s and 40s and regretted tying the knot! It depends on the person if they are ready, there's not really a specific age. Be Happy!
@mikyung (2234)
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
We can marry when we are ready, emotionally, physically and financially, I believe. There is no specific age because we mature differently, it depends on person to person. Getting married is something that is out of my mind, way back when I still young. I finally realized the value of having a partner when I met my wife. Yes, every commitment has its inherent risk and we cannot avoid that. We need to face, it's the reality
1 person likes this
@natliegleb (5184)
• India
10 Oct 12
it all depends on your perspective if you know how to handle life afterwards its fine
1 person likes this
@GemmaR (8526)
10 Oct 12
I don't think that age really matters a lot of time, as long as you both want the same things from your life at the time that you're getting married. If you love somebody, and you are sure that you have a long and happy future together, then I think that it might be a really good idea to get married with them. You should write a list of all of the good things and the bad things that might happen from getting married and then see if you can work out whether it is the right thing for you. Only you can make this huge decisions about your future.
1 person likes this
@youless (96935)
• Guangzhou, China
10 Oct 12
It depends on. But I personally think marring at my early 20s is rather early for me. After I graduated from the college, I was already at that age. I didn't want to get married soon after graduation. I was not mature yet. Besides, I need more time to know more each other. As the marriage is a lifetime issue for me. I don't want to feel regretful to it. Finally I got married when I was 28 years old.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
Well it depends to the person who you are marrying. But if you really love the person without any second thoughts, then it must be really worth it! :)
1 person likes this
10 Oct 12
You said it yourself, that marriage is a lifetime commitment. Following this line of thought, it is indeed one of our lives' major decision to make. We must be ready in all aspects of our lives before we settle into this. I think, it does not matter if you're in your early or late 20's just as long as you are ready. When there is nothing holding you back, when there are no more doubts, when you have already enjoyed being single, and you feel that it is he perfect time.
1 person likes this
• Bangladesh
10 Oct 12
I never recomend any delay in marriage. If someone wants to build a happy conjugal life then its not any delay in marriage. Late marriage partners cant satisfy each other so to speak the truth. While going with a conjugal life they may try to build their financial career. But financial career should not be any condition of starting a conjugal life. Stay fine.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Oct 12
I got married when I was almost 22 years old. I didn't regret marrying at an early age. It's good because while I'm still young, I am able to send my child to school already. He will graduate in university 14 years from now. That means I'm still young. LOL. There are advantages and disadvantages in marrying early. I hope you will decide about it carefully. Happy mylotting.
1 person likes this
@sq2108 (95)
• China
10 Oct 12
For girl, 23 to 27 is the best age for marriage. While 28 to 32 is the best marriage age for boy. As we all know, the best age for woman to have a baby is between 24 and 30, too young or too old are not good for baby. And man always is the main financial resource of a family, so if a man is too young and can't have stable finance, it will be very hard to deal with family expenditure after marriage. Hence i think man should be older than woman when they have marriage. But i find many person having marriage at a pretty early age, they live happily as well. So age is not the main factor. It's depending on your mutual love and your attitude toward your coming marriage.
1 person likes this