Because I don't have the money now, does it mean he has the right to do this?

Philippines
October 12, 2012 9:54am CST
In life, there is always ups & downs. And whenever we encounter this, there are people whom we can really count on. Others might be there because you still have the means, I mean the money, but the moment you don't have the money anymore, they will also disappear. Although others are still there no matter what. Just like my own brother, before, he used to ask assistance from me, moral support and other things. But, I really do not know why a sudden change in his attitude. Wherein before, he used to say, if he is going to have a house of his own, I will definitely have a room in that house. But, everything in his words has changed. And even now that we are living under one roof because this is my parent's house, he is pushing me to leave, though he does not have the right. Thus, I am thinking, my presence being an older sister is just important during those times because I have the means to give him the money he always ask. And since I am not capable of giving a high amount this time, so he is treating like I am not his sister anymore.
3 people like this
12 responses
@kokomo (1868)
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
I feel sorry for what you are experiencing right now.I am also supporting my younger brother for his financial needs for he is a graduating student.I hope that he will not be like your brother this time.But assessing my brother I think he will not do that.
1 person likes this
@WakeUpKitty (8711)
• Netherlands
12 Oct 12
First of all being someone's sister doesn't mean you have to pay for (your) siblings. If it comes to that I don't understand your conclusion/statement that you have (had) the means to give him the money he needs. The fact your brother wants you to leave is because he wants to have your parent's home sooner or later. Without you staying there and interfering or pointing him on the fact you always gave him the money he needed. Your brother might be your brother but he is not different from other people, the kind you will meet on the street and get friends with. The so called friends who stay with you as long as you can help them out. The kind that will dump you if you have no value anymore or they found someone who can help them better as you can. Bloodbond doesn't mean you have more right, there is more loyalty. You are just fooling yourself. Pull your hands of this brother and make your own plans for the future and start saving money for your own life/future/goals. If you don't open up your eyes now you will end up in a life full of misery on your own.
1 person likes this
@ARIES1973 (9436)
• Legaspi, Philippines
12 Oct 12
I feel sad to know that aira. Maybe he was just upset and everything will be fine as soon as he realized the effect of his actions. I have two children who are on the growing up years and it would be very painful for the parents also if they see that their children are having some misunderstandings. I hope everything will be settled between the two of you. Good night!
1 person likes this
@Raine38 (8909)
• United States
13 Oct 12
If you don't mind my asking, don't you have work? Do you rely to him for your basic needs? I don;t know how it is in your family, but with ours, my parents raised us to be self-sufficient. Even if there's already 3 of us who are working and very much doing okay, my parents still work so they have a money of their own. None of us have any expectations from anyone of us when it comes to money and financial support, but we all know that should one of us badly need some, we will be very much willing to give. We do not give a regular support to our parents but all 3 of us give them from time to time especially if we got bonuses. Sometimes we just go on ahead and pay their bills. My mom never spend the oney we give her anyway, it all goes to her bank account. She said it will be so that when the time comes and we're the ones who might need some money, she will be able to help. I do understand how you feel because your brother shouldn't have said words he can't stand on. Does he already have his own family? Could be the reason that he wants you out is because of his own family needing the space or privacy. I am not saying he is right in treating you this way, but we cannot really put our trust and faith to anyone about our future. We must equip ourselves so we can live without being a bother to anyone.
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
Good day Raine38, I do have a work on my own though my earnings is not as high as I am receiving before. Aside from that, I am not asking for any financial support from my brother since I know, his earnings is allocated for the budget for his family. All I just wanted is one room where I can stay, hence, the house where we lived is a property of my parents, so I guess, it is fine to live here.
@Raine38 (8909)
• United States
14 Oct 12
Well, if it is your parents' property, then you have all the right to live there and have your own room. Goodness, he doesn't have the right to kick you out. If he's the one who's got his own family already, then I think he should be the one to provide for a house for his family the way they will see fit.
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
Hi there Raine38, The house where I lived belongs to my parents. So, I was really surprised with the behavior being shown to me by my brother, as if he really owns the house.
@Angelpink (4023)
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
I think siblings needs to be discipline , don't allow them to abuse your kindness. If you allowed them once forever they will oppress you. Sometimes we can say that those people who are not our bloodline are better than those who are ours. Sometimes you must be rigid for them so they will learn a lesson and will know to respect and value you as a sister. Happy Sunday Aira..
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
Hi Angelpink, I guess, our relationship as siblings is now like a glass that was broken. Because my brother is not really respecting me anymore and I feel so hurt about this. I just hope and pray that he will realize soon what he is doing towards me.
@marguicha (76188)
• Chile
14 Oct 12
He doesn`t have the right to do that, and I hope he realises soon that he is being very selfish. I`m sorry that you have to live that, but maybe you have to give him some time. How old is he? Did he marry? What are his reasons? Have you confronted him?
@leeandrew (1226)
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
Hubby and her sister is not doing good too these days, and that because her sister is a pro live-in kind of woman, very liberated in thinking. Hubby is a pastor and of course would do anything to make his sister do the right thing. I don't think your brother has any single right to drive you away from that house since it's your parents house. As a child, you also has a right to live in that house as long as you want it unless you parents has given it to him. Money is a very shallow reason to send a sibling away from her parents house unless she had done a very horrible things that affect the whole family.
• Portugal
13 Oct 12
dont be sad. you always helped your brother. he should understand that you are not rich so you cant give him a lot of money. i guess maybe he just doesnt know how hard it is to get money. how hard we need to work to have it in the end of the month. you should talk with him and let him see that you cant give him more because you dont have it. dont be sad. im sure soon he will change his attitude. be strong
@natliegleb (5186)
• India
13 Oct 12
definitely not i would surely oppose it by any means and he should not be treated fairly and it is not the right thing anyways,you must treat him badly
13 Oct 12
i don't think he has the right to do that to you. i mean all of that to you. you was still his sister and no matter what happens, you was still part of his family. and i don't think because you don't have the means to support him or give him all what he wants, he has the right to treat you like not his family anymore. family is next to God that will always be there whatever happens, during ups and more on downs..
• India
13 Oct 12
Its really pathetic.it shows he is selfish and money minded.certainely he has no right to do this so you should oppose this and realize that people are different.and you should behave accordingly.
• United States
12 Oct 12
I know a lof of people like this. My husband's brother is pretty wealthy and as long as he is helping his sisters financially, he is their best friend. But when he says no then they only have bad things to say about him. We pretty much live week to week, so they don't ask us for money. But at holidays when the family gets together, guess who the favorite brother is? My husband's brother, of course! Everyone acts like his best friend at family get togethers and they treat my husband terrible. I'm glad we only have to get together with them twice a year!!