How do you assess a person, and give them your trust?

@chiyosan (29383)
Philippines
October 14, 2012 3:33am CST
i just thought of this, well of course many of us have gone through alot, met a lot of people in our lives and then we are sometimes held back because we started out trusting, but then would become aloof or reserved due to an experience with certain people. As with me right now, i actually am kind of reserved when it comes to giving my trust. i often held back now and would even think some people are actually up to something when they approach me, etc... but then i wuld be carefree with people i have known for long time and would be trusting them because i know they have not done anything wrong to me. =) But with people i just met, people who wants to be friends with me, get to know me.. i usually try to assess them and watch out for their moves and i tend not to give out too much of myself, may it be information, trust, or anything that could cause me to be hurt in the process. What about you??
1 person likes this
9 responses
@dharanil (319)
• India
14 Oct 12
I will assess people by watching 'how they are reacting in my critical situation'. It may take sometime, as you said.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
16 Oct 12
most certainly we usually give it time so we could get to know a person really well and if we are able to still stand by them after all our discoveries of them, i guess that is when we are able to fully know someone and if they are worthy of our trust.
@dpk262006 (56108)
• Delhi, India
14 Oct 12
Hi there! There is nothing wrong in your stand. Not sharing personal information with unknown persons is OK. I am the one who would mostly trust others. I normally use my wisdom and experience to assess a person but one part of my mind says that s/he would as kind and nice like me. I've been cheated in the past for trusting blindly and that has taught me a lesson.
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@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
16 Oct 12
i have been like that myself - before.. but i have enver really trusted someone fully anymore... because of what has happened to me in the past, what has become of the things i expected and turned out diferrently....
@natliegleb (5186)
• India
14 Oct 12
if a person trusts me so much,i can give my life and soul to him,whereas one who cheats will get punished instantly
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@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
16 Oct 12
we could be talking about karma in this instance when every action there is an equal reaction.
@kokomo (1868)
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
Yes, you are right.We should trust the one who we knew for so long and never betrayed us.It is really hard to entrust somebody who we just met and then divulge all the details about our lives.It is better to know them little by little so that we could really assess if they would be reliable and trustworthy enough.
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@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
16 Oct 12
that is right, like love or getting to know a person we should be able to give our trust to that someone over time, when we have already gotten to know who that person really is, people really are good nowadays to keep what they truly are...
@sjvenden27 (1850)
• United States
14 Oct 12
Trust.. That is major... Trusting a stranger? Nope never.. It may be wrong I dont care who you are or who you may know, that I know.. I wont trust you right away.. Most of the time (offline) I wont even talk a whole lot.. I am still nice and respectful to everyone that I may bump into.. I end up watching in silence for awhile; looking at posture, movement of the persons hands and other body motions while talking.. Raise your voice at me, I may stand there out of respect.. but my ears are turned off.. lost your ablity to try to become anything more then a strange walking down the street.. Ive been hurt to deeply by too many I love or loved.. I have too much to lose.. I will not wager my life on bad first impressions.. does anyone person have my complete faith?? Nope... but there is one person that is the highest and that would be my auntie whos more like a mother to me... Someone a long long long time ago had my complete faith... and they used and abused it time and time again... So I dont care who you are.. when I mean you your trust level is at zero or lower...and its a rocky road buliding up that trust level with me... most never get too close to the top.. most end up screwing me over and leaving..
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@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
16 Oct 12
hi there. i thank you so much for your response to the discussion. appreciate you sending this experience here so we too could learn from it. in our lives time and again, i would agree and say even that it is impossible not to have experienced something like this, being betrayed by someone whom we trusted...
@pahak627 (4198)
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
It's hard to assess a person specially a stranger. It takes a long time before you can trust a person.
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@jaiho2009 (39021)
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
I can relate with you because I have many experiences with fake people. I am also the kind of person who easily trust people because I thought and believed every people I've met are honest like me (not boasting myself) It hurts when we give our full trust only to find out that the person we trusted much is not worth, a cheat and betrayed us in the end. Since then, slowly I came to realized that doubting is not bad, or having some space or walls sometimes has benefit/s to know the person well before giving our trust.
@dpk262006 (56108)
• Delhi, India
14 Oct 12
It means initially you doubt about every new person you meet.
@dharanil (319)
• India
14 Oct 12
Hi dpk262006 His words,"It hurts when we give our full trust only to find out that the person we trusted much is not worth, a cheat and betrayed us in the end", shows that he have some bitter experience, for me there is nothing wrong in his attitude. Its not just like money or something else, i think trust is more than anything.
@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
16 Oct 12
hi dpk, i think initially most people would always have that doubt towards people they would meet for the first time.. just so they can be sure
@mensab (4208)
• Philippines
14 Oct 12
well, the level of trust corresponds to the level of my knowledge of that person. if i know him/her well, then my level of trust is high. if not, then i tend to reserve my trust to a minimum. usually, i trust people because i believe that they will not so any harm if i show them goodness. i still hold this belief until this day.
@jricky1 (6809)
• China
14 Oct 12
I will always be honest to my friends and also lovers.I assess people through their way of talking and whether they are trying to hide something from me.Meanwhile i try to give them best thing that i could give.I'm such an honest person and i can't stand people betray me coz that's really hurt.