My cousin's wife came here with her 3 years old daughter..

fighting - Fighting is not good in a relationship.
Philippines
October 18, 2012 3:40am CST
This morning when i wake up I saw my mom talking to my cousin,s wife i thought they just visiting us but it's kind weird because she brought some clothes and crying. She had a big fight with my cousin and she doesn't know where to go. She remembered what i told her before that if case of emergency or need help she can came to me anytime, and now she's here. I am glad she came here because we can help here and keep them safe. I called my cousin to informed that his wife and daughter are here and there's nothing worry about. When were talking over the phone my cousin was crying and regret what he had said and done. I am hoping they can fix it as soon as possible because their daughter is very sad and i can see it in her eyes. I am planning to bring her to the mall later so that we can have some cake and ice cream, and were going to timezone to play. I am hoping she can forget her sadness even for a while.
5 people like this
14 responses
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
You are a nice Tita to your niece my friend , keep it up! Quarrels between couples can really affect their children. So, as much as possible they shouldn't do it in front of their children. They can just do it in the confines of their bedroom by themselves only. It's nice that your cousin owns up his mistake to his wife.
1 person likes this
@SIMPLYD (90722)
• Philippines
20 Oct 12
When my husband and i were in our early years of marriage, we always fight also. But we do it when our daughter is already asleep. Thus, she can't hear us fight. I have also thought of leaving the house, but i have to think of my daughter who will be greatly affected. And thank God that i don't do it, because after a day, we are again okay.
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
Wow you such a great couple because you do all your best not to fight in front of your daughter. Your daughter is very grateful have a mom like you whose loving and always thinking for the goodness of her family and child. Have a great day!
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Hi SIMPLYD, thank you my friend. I agree with you, as possible they shouldn't fight in front of their daughter because it can affects her feelings and for sure it will affects her emotional development too. My father told to them to calm down next time try to solve their problem first instead of fighting.
@Raine38 (12257)
• United States
18 Oct 12
Your cousin and his wife are so lucky to have someone like you in the family. At least he can rest assure that his family is safe and within the custody of family so they will be fine. I also believe that when times are tough, we must act like a real family and be there for each other. So far we haven't experienced any situation that is worse than that but each time there are some minor issues, I am glad that the rest of my family also believe that as family, issues must be resolved because we are all together in this.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
Hi Raine, were the only nearest relatives they got here in the city and we want to keep them safe as much as possible because were family. I agree with you when tough time came we can only count on to our real family. My parents are doing they best to talk to my cousin and to his wife to figure our what the cause of the might and how they can solve it. I am hoping they can solve it so soon or else i will call my aunt so that she can take care of my niece.
1 person likes this
@sjvenden27 (1840)
• United States
18 Oct 12
It is very sad when a young child is caught in the middle of their parents problems.. I am so happy to hear your cousins wife was able to come to your place and be safe.. It is so comforting to know that even with the ecomny people are still willing to help their extended famiy in a moments notice.. I hope your cousin and his wife are able to work their problems out.. Granted there is always a possibilty that their relationship may be over... But they are connected for life with their little girl.. There will be events that she will want both parents there and it to be a postive experince.. I hope all goes well for you and your whole family;-)
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Hello sjvenden27, as of now they both fine and trying to start all over again. I am just hoping that they will never fight infront of their daughter because i saw how sad she was. But right now my niece is doing fine and nonstop playing alphabet cards with me.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Oct 12
I am so happy that your niece is doing good, and it sounds like she is getting some quailty aunty time;-) Fighting in front of your niece would devaste her.. Regardless of what anyone would say she will think that she did something wrong.. Even if they wait until she is a sleep she can wake up but not get up just lay there.. listening.. Yes it is easy to start yelling when there is a heated discussion.. They could always step outside or go some where else if they need to scream at each other.. Not that it solves anything; just sometimes can not be avoided..
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
I agree that fighting sometimes can not be avoid but as much as possible never let the children to witness the unnecessary scene. Thanks
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
hi bhebelen, Good thing that she can rely on you in this kind of needs Fight and misunderstanding is just natural but if they are both physically, mentally and emotionally battered most of the time I think it's better to separate lives. hope they will fix things soon happy mylotting by the way can you buy some ice cream and cake for me too? just kidding
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
I am hoping and praying that they can fix it as soon as possible and if you have time you can come here and have some cakes and ice cream with us.
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
wow!really and seriously????? that will be a rain check
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
@riyauro (6421)
• India
18 Oct 12
I am glad that they could count on you. some people just say for the sake of formality and when the time comes to help they back off. You are doing good work, I am sure you are a good human being and that's why you can't see people's sadness. the little girl will love it at the mall and sadness will go away. Thanks for sharing and have a wonderful day ahead.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
Hi riyauro, i am glad that they came here or else they might lost because they just transferred here in the city few weeks ago. When i told my niece that were going to mall later she started to smile and talking again like nothings happened. She told me that she loves strawberry cheesecake and vanilla ice cream like me.
1 person likes this
@fatlex06 (895)
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
OH.Yes. I hope it'll be fixed soon. They should talk again and try to fix things up. Let's pray that it wouldn't take them any longer to forgive each other. And for her daughter, I remember my niece's reaction when she saw my brother and my sister-in-law fighting and shouting at each other. It brought her trauma that everytime she hears someone shouting,or even arguing, she cries. So we always see to it that she's in a happy environment. Have a great icecream cone with her. :)
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
When i saw my niece this morning she hugged me so tight and cried, i know that was traumatize for what she had saw and i need to help her to overcome it. My cousin is here now and talking to her wife, i hoping that can settle everything and try to forgive and forget what happened but i told them to let my niece stay with us for a while so that they go out and enough time to each other.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
18 Oct 12
How wonderful that she had a soft place to fall in the situation...And I do hope resolution come quickly so that the family is back together again...it's sad when things like this happen but on the other hand it clears the air....and gives them a new place to start.
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Hi jillhill, everything is doing fine between my cousin and his wife but i told them have sometime together and go out on a date. I think they just need to have time to each other and they need to talk.
@shaggin (71659)
• United States
18 Oct 12
I hope that especially for the little 3 year old girls sake that they are able to work things out. I dont know what happened why she ran from him but I am glad that she went to your house and you welcomed her in to keep her and the little girl safe. I think you are so nice what you are doing for your neice taking her to the mall for ice cream and to play at the timezone. I hope it makes her feel a little better.
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Hi shaggin, she ran away because of simple misunderstanding and want to have a little time to think. I am glad too that they came here and we can able to help them to solve their problems. My niece really loves the cake and ice cream, she really enjoyed our mall date.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
Nice work here I hope that everything is fine between the couple now. Misunderstanding between married couple is always there- good thing that they there are people like you who are around to give them support
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Hi jaiho2009, everything is fine now but i asked them to stay here at home for a while and go back to their house by Monday. because I think they need a family support right now.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
That was really a good gesture of letting your cousin's wife and daughter to stay with you for a while. I am sure both of them are grateful for your generosity and hospitality.
• Philippines
18 Oct 12
My cousin's wife is very nice person and her daughter is very cute and lovable, we can not reject them because they already part of our family. Also we are willing to help them to fix their problem as long as we can. If your in my situation for sure you will also do the same, right?
@surekharathi (14146)
• India
19 Oct 12
Really hard to live such type of person always fight, arguments whenever meet. But if your mom is saying then you should polite behave with her. But great you are feeling happy you want to help them when staying in your home. Yes this is good idea child always like ice cream, cake etc.
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Well your right! When i was young my parents are always fighting and i have no place to go. I am glad they came here because we can keep them safe. She enjoyed the ice cream and cakes very much.
@mikyung (2232)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
Yo uare such a good aunt and a cousin at that. I can relate in this discussion. For I was in that same situation, I am the one, shoulder to cry on person. It really saddens me if I see people fighting and end up separating. I hope they can patch up things and move on. Life is too short to be like that. Thanks
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
18 Oct 12
Its not good she had a fight. But thank god she had a place to go to. many dont and end up in shelters or even on the streets. I had an abusive husband so I understand her getting away from her. Please help her, she needs you now.
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
Hi mariaperalta, yeah i will help her because she needs a friend and sister right now, even though she already talked to my cousin but i decided to let them stay here for a while to make sure their fine.
@Tongcv (172)
• China
19 Oct 12
Life between husband and wife,not because of some chores between both parents,work and friends,as well as spouses itself and produce little friction,good control of small friction can eliminate,and vice versa will grows increasingly large will be out of control,then tend to be hurt most children(in the case of children),due to the small children do not understand the big world of those things,and ultimately lead to the breakdown of the family.
• Philippines
19 Oct 12
. Even though the children can't understand what happening in her surroundings but when she/he felt something wrong it will affects her feelings and scared them too.