Keep your relationship exciting?

@GemmaR (8527)
October 20, 2012 1:35pm CST
I'm sure that you've all been in the situation where you have been in a relationship for a long time and it doesn't seem as though it is exciting any more. If you feel like this then you might start to think that you shouldn't be with that person any more, but that is almost certainly not the case. You should try to do something to add a little bit of spice to the relationship, whether that's start going out once per week or try to start a new hobby together. What are your tips to add a little bit more excitement to your relationship when you've been together for a long time?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@jenny1015 (13394)
• Philippines
21 Oct 12
The best would be having some time together in a different environment. Some couples tend to lose the spark when they have become busy with work and kids. And yes, getting out of the house to have a date is next to impossible sometimes. But if you really want to rekindle the fire, there are ways on how to make an ordinary day turn into a special one- let kids go to your parent's house or your in laws' house.
@GemmaR (8527)
21 Oct 12
It is always a good idea to try and have a little bit of time away from the children, because if you don't do this then there is the danger of you becoming "parents" and then not thinking that you have any other role in life. You should try to find a babysitter for one night per week and then go out for a meal or something. Even if it is only for a couple of hours it is much better than nothing at all and you should find that it is enough to keep the spark in your relationship and keep the pair of you nice and happy as a couple.
@jenny1015 (13394)
• Philippines
22 Oct 12
Yeah, that's true. I wish my husband reads this.
@adnileb (5017)
• Philippines
20 Oct 12
My tip would be, try to think of the past when you first met each other. Those times when both of you are so in love. In that case, all the love will go back from where it started. I want you to read my comment here, http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/2712578.aspx?p=1#1_16282608 I think it's kind of a tip too. I wanted to copy it then paste here but it's too unprofessional.
@GemmaR (8527)
20 Oct 12
I think that trying to get some aspects back from when you first met is a good thing, because that is obviously how things were when you fell in love with each other. However, things were completely different for me then than they are now, because I was living as a student when we got together. I am now living back at home trying to save up for a mortgage, so I know that I cannot necessarily do all of the things that we did when we got together in the first place, but I suppose that we could try to do some of the things that we did in the past.
@adnileb (5017)
• Philippines
21 Oct 12
Well, if you really want to work things out, everything is possible. Have a nice weekend!
@dorannmwin (36696)
• United States
22 Oct 12
The main thing that I can think of is that you don't want to find that you are falling into the same routine all of the time. If it is possible, choose one day in each week where you are able to do something that is outside of the normal routine that you have in your life. This could be something as simple as going for a walk together or it could be something as complex as going on a trip together with one another on a regular basis.
@GemmaR (8527)
23 Oct 12
I agree that a routine is not a good thing. If you do get into a routine then there is the chance that you might find that you're doing the same things all of the time and that there is never anything new in your life. I love going for walks, but it is great to find other places to go to that you might never have been to before; or maybe even doing your route the opposite way round as this can make it more exciting for you as well. You should always make time to go on trips with your partner as this is something that you would both enjoy.
@Aja103654 (5663)
• Philippines
21 Oct 12
Yes, I'm going through that one now. It's not really that i am bored with him, not at all, just miss him because he is so busy that we barely see each other nowadays. I feel neglected though i know i shouldn't feel that way. I'm trying to come up with ways to get his attention, mostly for fun and I want to be swept off my feet again just like when we started our relationship
@GemmaR (8527)
21 Oct 12
It is hard because we know that we're not happy with the way that things are, but it is hard to see how things could possibly change for the better at the moment. I think that you have to be able to talk to him about the way that you're feeling, because he might think that there is nothing wrong. There may be something that you could do about it. I know that it is hard when you're both busy but even if there is something that you could do just once per week it is better than not spending any kind of quality time together at all.
• United States
21 Oct 12
I totally agree with you. Sometimes some people just think that ur suppose to be nice and romantic in the beginning and in the end all that doesn't matter anymore. I think that's one of the reason so many relationships fail. It's not just being with each. You gotta keep each other happy. I'm ot sayin buying expensive stuff or expensive dinners but sometimes keeping it interesting, surprising and fun helps a lot. Don't just always stay home. Go out... A ill picnic in the park or rent a movie and watch, flowers even if u pick them from the neighbors garden lol
@GemmaR (8527)
21 Oct 12
I don't like the people who think that they no longer have to put in the effort when they've been together for a long time, because nobody wants a partner who just doesn't care about them in the slightest. Flowers are a lovely thing to be able to get from your partner, especially if you have done nothing to need them and you are just doing it because they happened to be thinking about you at the time. There is no need to spend a lot of money because the best things in life are free anyway and it means that you are able to enjoy them more.
• Philippines
20 Oct 12
Keep the fire burning! You have to cme up with something new even if those are just little things to keep your partner excited. Try a new different hobby together, go to places you've never visited and make it a point that you spend time apart so you miss each other.
@GemmaR (8527)
21 Oct 12
I think that going to places that we have never visited is a good thing, but it is something that we struggle with because I really don't like using public transport and he has not been able to get a car yet. I know that it is something that we are going to be buying relatively soon, but until then we're just going to have to stick to visiting the same places all of the time like we did when we were first dating. Hopefully when we get a car we will find that this will help us in the long term to do new things together and keep the spark alive.
@mariaperalta (19096)
• Mexico
20 Oct 12
Might be the reason why so many relationships end in divorce. Mine did. As he was a clubber and a drinker and I wasnt.
@GemmaR (8527)
20 Oct 12
I think that it can sometimes be a big problem if the two of you are so different, because you will want to do different things in the time that you choose to spend together. It is a shame that your relationship ended because of this, because my partner likes drinking and I don't, but this just means that he is able to go out with his friends while I go out with mine to do something that I enjoy doing. It is good and healthy to be able to spend some time apart as long as you do get the chance to spend quality time together as well.