how to forget someone you love?

Philippines
October 22, 2012 10:52am CST
My boyfriend told me that he needs space. He needs time for himself, family and friends and i told him that it is okay. but the truth is, it isnt okay. I am really hurt I dont know how to move on, how to continue life without him, please help me what to do. how can i forget someone i truly love? how can i move on? how can i stop the pain and how can i control myself from crying and thinking about him? is there still a chance that will get back together?
4 people like this
26 responses
@WakeUpKitty (8704)
• Netherlands
22 Oct 12
If you can't get what you want there is no other way as accepting it. I don't think your bf is honest with you.. needing some space means: I want to date others and you are in my way. Ask yourself why you are so hurt. Was it because you invested a lot in him but he didn't do the same to you? Aren't you actualy mad on yourself since you let yourself carry away that much, you had complete other hopes, dreams as he had? Did he ever made all those promises you dreamed of? It can be possible you be together one day again, perhaps tomorrow, perhaps in some years but I would not count on it. Make a plan/scedule how to organize your life/days. What you will do next, be proud of yourself if you manage and pamper yourself each day. Compliment yourself, do 3 things to please yourself daily plus write them down. Small things, bigger things. Live by the day if the days are too hard at the moment. You will mange, since you are a strong person.
1 person likes this
@youless (96988)
• Guangzhou, China
22 Oct 12
I am sorry to hear that. Actually I think this is just a terrible excuse to break up. If he loves you, he will try to spend more time with you because you are the most important person for him in this world. I know you feel very hurtful now, but in fact the time is the best medicine. Sooner or later you will feel better, especially when you meet the right one for you. At that time you will think actually your ex-boyfriend is not that important. He can be replaced. So just let it be.
• Philippines
22 Oct 12
It was actually my fault. he was a very nice bf, he is so sweet, loving and caring but the only problem we had, he lied to me and because of that, i told him many rude things and negative and he was really hurt. that is why we came up to this situation its all because of me..
22 Oct 12
Hello dear, My advice to you is don't control yourself from crying, It's better if you'll cry and cry until you'll get sick of it... that's the way to move on... Last 4 yrs, I cried a lot, I think I cried for two months because of break ups... and now, I'm strong... Just don't think too much about it, Think positive, There are a lot of boys in this world... just wait for the right guy to come... :)
• Philippines
22 Oct 12
yah that is really easy to say but so hard to do... there are a lot of boys in this world but what if i dont see anyone but him only... he is my life and i dnt know how to continue living without him...its really hard and i am really hurt. i want to cry every day and every night. :-( i want to get him back....
• Indonesia
24 Oct 12
You boyfriend just told you that he needs space so he just needs time to solve the problems that may be encountered him. The best way is to approach his family or people who close with him. Maybe he still love you but he doesn't want you get trouble because his own problem..
@mythociate (16298)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
24 Oct 12
When he said he needs space, did that just mean he doesn't want to be 'together all the time'? or did he actually break up with you? If you're not sure, wait for him the next couple weeks. If he starts seeing someone new (and--you know--doing the 'lover's display' in public like he used to do with you), then it's clearer. If he doesn't, but comes back to you; you two just needed a break to gain a little perspective. I say 'wait' because you have to be "sure" before you really get over him. Why? Well, "the best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody else," but that's where you 'burn the bridges that lead back to your past' (the phrase 'burning bridges' goes back to when Roman conquerors would burn the bridges back to their already-conquered land when they- & their armies-were in an unconquered land---so that they would 'either conquer the new land or die trying.')
@estremms (324)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
Let time pass by and you will eventually forget your boyfriend. For now do something that can entertain yourself. Find a new interesting thing to do to divert your attention from crying and thinking always of your boyfriend.
@jazzyme (113)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
Cry if you must!That will surely ease the pain, maybe just for a while. Take a deep breathe.Pray.If you are really meant for each other fate will bring him back to you.True love waits.Focus on other things, if not to forget him,at least to forget the pain.Forgetting and healing process is very difficult and hard but if you will make yourself busy you can do it.
• China
23 Oct 12
Maybe it's real that he doesn't love you, it's the fact,and love can't rexist reluctanly.So just consider it like that: you let slip a guy who doesn't love you, and the guy pass up a lady who devote passion to him, I would say how pityful for him, and you are lucky not to get together with someone doesn't love you. Don't be still thinking about him, because he doesn't deverve you.
• United States
23 Oct 12
The best way to forget someone is to act like they don't exists. That way you get over it faster and 9 times out of 10 in bugs the other person so much that they end up wanting you back. Don't over think this, you know what you need to do. Good luck
@mariaperalta (19094)
• Mexico
23 Oct 12
I truly think there is no way to forget them. Maybe you have to distance yourself from them sometimes. But youll never forget a loved one. They will always have a place in your heart no matter where they are. Have a great day there.
@tatzkie23 (773)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
hi there girl thing, sorry to hear about that. I know how hurt you are right now, and it's ok to cry and cry and cry..until one day you'll realize that everything's going to be ok. You see, based on my experience, i was also so hurt when my first bf/love left me for no damn reason. I was like crying and crying all the time especially at night. And every time i wake up he's all i see in my mind and i start to cry again. I was depressed. So sad! and then one day, i told myself that i need to stop this! this is not me! i am strong! I don't deserve selfish people! I deserve better! So right in there, i stand up from my bed, wiped my tears and smile! And realized thing's happens for a reason. But you see, honestly speaking, by being hurt by someone i really love makes me closer to God and to my family and friends. Because i learned that, There are still other things that will make me happy. I just need to look around. Since that day, started to be more open to the world and people around me. I got matured in my way of thinking and how i see things. You may cry a river, that's ok because that is part of healing the pain. But you see, the world still goes around no matter what.
@HuaZhao (457)
• China
23 Oct 12
Hi, girls must be strong and independent. Do you have an aim?If you have, fight for your dream. When you achieve your goal , you will forget him.
23 Oct 12
boyfriend? old or new? Do they just stay inside your mind?
• China
23 Oct 12
I think there is no better way to forget some loving than time and what you doing or thinking now is right.this is a process in which so many people have been through.Time is good medic,it can give you less pain ,soften your heart and finally get you in peace.So be it,good luck.
• Indonesia
23 Oct 12
He is gone, live with it, never ever think about get back together except if that's what both of you want. There is no point in thinking about people that never think about you. The best way to forget someone you love is to find another one to be loved.
@Angelpink (4022)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
That is very true , we often say , 'i am fine , i am okay ' but deep inside i know it's breaking and exploding , indescribable ! Don't you worry , it will pass , it will . Live with that pain , from there you will grow. Don't allow pain to overthrow you , your whole being. The beautiful thing there is you are always given an option , not yet late , make up your mind then , dust yourself , head up and continue your journey , one best guy awaits for you ! More experiences to come and sadder and heavier maybe , but thats okay , you can always make it , you are born a winner and a queen !
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
It is so sad to know that but life must go on. Everything has its own reason of happening. Maybe he is not the right one for you. You can't say that you can't continue living because he is not with you. Of course, you really can. You can't stop the pain. Just feel the pain until it hurts no more. Cry out loud until not a single tear drops on your eyes. Let it all out.
@wolfie34 (26792)
• United Kingdom
23 Oct 12
Welcome to Mylot, I hate that old chestnut 'I need space' why can't he be really honest with you? If he can't be honest, would you really want someone like that in your life? It's his loss anyway. Forgive the old adage time heals, time is a great healer, and each day you move forward you will get stronger. Try to involve yourself in activities that you enjoy, going out with friends, pampering yourself, treat yourself after all you are worth it, even if he can't see it. Crying is good, I wish I could cry, then I would have healed sooner, but as a guy crying is seen as a weakness. Crying purges all the hurt, heartache and misery inside. Treat this as one of lifes experiences, it wasn't meant to be, you will in time find someone special and someone who can be upfront and honest about how he feels about you instead of giving you some lame excuse!
@mikyung (2234)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
Most of us have these moments wherein we feel that our hearts are being torn apart. Really, everyone needs some space to think and refocus on things. I can see positive results of this to have a clear and fresh start. Do not think, that this is the end of you road, for the both of you. Things can be fixed if you want to. You need to talk and sort things out. Hope everything will turn out right. Good luck. Thanks
@jenny1015 (13388)
• Philippines
23 Oct 12
I don't think that you can completely forget a person most especially those who have touched our hearts. You can only lessen the time in thinking about him if you will just give yourself a chance to be busy with much more important stuff. The crying is natural. It may take you weeks or months before you completely get over with it. That is normal. But if you set your mind of just making you the best person even without him, I am sure that you will feel good in no time. Cheer up!