Ideal children

@Jenith (1382)
Philippines
November 1, 2012 9:09pm CST
One of the reasons in getting married is for us couple to have children. A home is a better place to live and more happy if there's kid around. Ideally, how many children do we need to have? Would it be best if we only have 1? or 2?
1 person likes this
11 responses
@joycseer (845)
• Malaysia
18 Nov 12
Hi Jenith, surely in order to have a complete feel of a family is to have children. However, it also depends whether the couple has the financial ability to support the child. If yes, then they can go ahead with it. Otherwise, will need proper planning to build up the foundation before the children comes to place. This will not only prepare the child a healthy brought up environment, and also the parents wouldn't feel so burden as they have prepared well financially for the child. Normally a family would prefer at least 2 child. This is because having 1 would be lonesome to the only child. But it all depends on the couple whether or not they can afford supporting that number of children in the family. Nowadays is not easy to take care of children. Their expenses a month can easily be more expensive and higher than adults. For a more well off family, they can have as many as they wanted to as long as the child is given proper brought up and education. I have seen some families giving birth to more than 5 children in a family. And then complaining to the government that they couldn't afford bringing up the child. If cannot bring up the child, why give birth to so many? Not only it burdens the family, but also the child is not being well taken care of. This end up having the child roaming around like gangsters with no proper education due to family lack of funds, and causing trouble to the society out there. Why would a parent want their children end up like that? So, the best would be to have children within your means and ability. Give the best care, nourishment and education with proper brought up, so that your child would be useful person to live a proper life they can when they grew up. =) That is what a parents heart would hope for the best for their children. =)
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
With our present economic situation, I guess having 2 children is fine. It is really difficult to make both ends meet. While it could be true that having a big family would be so much fun, but still, the amount of time that each children need is of utmost importance, as well.
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
I really wanted to hear advantages for having 1 kid so with disadvantages. Hope you could help me.
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
The advantages of having one child would be you would spend less in raising a kid. You will have more time to devote your attention to your child. The disadvantage for having one child would be, sometimes an only child wouldn't know how to share things with others because he got used to having everything all to himself. It could be lonely for a child without siblings to play with. When that child grows up and decides to get married, there would be no other child to be with.
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
4 Nov 12
Oh so my son is not alone! Lately, I let him play with the other kids and guess what, he went home crying and his friends told me that he wants to play his friends toys but then here's this 1 kid who doesn't want him to play with. He really thought that he owns all the toys around. What is the best thing to do with this kind of situation?
@livewyre (2455)
6 Nov 12
It is one of the reasons for getting married, but in our case e had decided that children were too much of a responsibility. However when we got a little older we thought maybe we would try... and a little girl came along. By this time we were too old to have any more than one child. It is lovely to have one and be able to devote all your timer and energy in this way, but equally it would be nice to have two so that they could learn to interact together. You should not feel any external pressure to have 1, 2 or more children, you should decide if you would like to have a child and see what happens. Later on if all goes well, maybe you would like another - maybe circumstances dictate otherwise. You should make the decisions that are right for your circumstances, your marriage and your family.
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
8 Nov 12
Wow this is great! Me too can't bear of too much responsibilities of having a baby. I don't know but I have this undescribable feeling. Maybe because people around me were pushing to have 1 more. It makes me think too knowing that not all the time I can bear a child.
@livewyre (2455)
8 Nov 12
I felt comfortable with our decision not to try for a child, so was not worried by any pressure (my sister has children, so there was no perceptible family pressure). Equally, I was comfortable with our decision to try for a child - no-one should be made to feel they should have children... it's a huge honour and privilege, and should not be made into a burden! I remember someone saying to me when we had out daughter: 'you must have been trying for a long time?' - 'yes' I said, 'about a month I think...' They had presumed we had wanted children as soon as we got married... I think the timing was right for us, but in retrospect some aspects of having another child would have been nice, but we feel blessed as it is and very grateful for a healthy child relatively late in life...
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
23 Dec 12
For a mother, bearing a child is a great honor and a blessing! But for some, specially for those who are not ready to become a mom it's really a burden.
@tigeraunt (6331)
• Philippines
3 Nov 12
i could have two if i wanted. but for health reasons, i opted to have one. of course that was planned, and she is a blessing. now she is married with a girl of her own.. our angel. have a nice day. ann
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
4 Nov 12
Nice to hear this, having 1 is less hassle, less hardships and all. So it's still good to have 1 and live happy. It's just a matter of choice and how you live your life. I'm so stressed nowadays. People closed to me makes me sick. huh3
1 person likes this
• India
2 Nov 12
Hi friend, our life will be fulfilled after getting marriage and giving birth to our kids. In this modern world, due to the heavy population, one kid is enough for a couple. By the way i have two sons and living happily with them
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
4 Nov 12
I rarely hear having 1 kid in the family. Most of them are having 2 like yours. Need to think more of what I really need. Looking back of everything I experienced during pregnancy, giving birth and all... it's really hard. But when I look my child wanted to stay outside the house coz he's happy playing with the other kids, I started to think if we would be more happy having another angel? Thanks for your views.
@Shavkat (65270)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
I think you need to consider the economic status. if you have the ability to have more than 2 children it would be fine.
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
I only need to have 1 or 2. I just want to weigh things for now if I really need to have another 1. Everybody around me always reminds me to have 1 more.
• Canada
2 Nov 12
Depends on everybody situation. Financially, 2 is double of everything. But having one, you may spoil him/her. So they probably end up almost the same. Boy and girl also different. Some wants 2 because want to have a girl and a boy. Some already have 2 boys or girls, and want to find the other gender, so they go for the third one. Depends on your partner as well. Your partner may want to have more/less kid. There is no rule.
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
Oh okay. I'm just a little bit curious. Thanks for your explanation.
• China
2 Nov 12
We have family planning policy here in China, if it is admited I want to have two kids.:)
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
ALmost everybody wants to have 2 kids. Do you have any idea why?
@asyria51 (2870)
• United States
2 Nov 12
Every family has its own situation. My husband and I always said that we were going to have two kids. Hopefully one boy and one girl. We were going to have them pretty close together so they would grow up together. My little girl will be 4 soon and we do not have a real plan to have number two anytime soon. Financially we are just getting back on our feet, and am afraid that having another child right now would jeopardize that.
@Jenith (1382)
• Philippines
2 Nov 12
Same here my son will turn 4 this December. I really wanted to have 2kids but due to financial instability I need to think again and again if I need to have another 1. I don't want to regret in the future. I need to decide what's best really soon.
@Crisanta (71)
24 Nov 12
If I would have to decide I prefer to have more than 1 kid but unfortunately because of health reason that my uterus in incapable to bear more kids,can't do nothing than to have only 1 ...
@maximax8 (28558)
• United Kingdom
19 Nov 12
A couple need to be in love and feel they are fully compatible to get married. A house becomes a home when the couple have a baby. He or she grows into a child. The ideal number of children depends on the size of the home and the couples finances. One child can become lonely or become spoiled. Two children can keep each other company. If the couple are wealthy having three or four children is a lovely possibility. If a lady has a baby in her early twenties and then two more children after age thirty five years old it is like having two children that have company in the end. I feel that my older son felt lonely growing up and he didn't get a brother until he was 12 years old. He got a sister when he was 14 years old.