I'm just mad..
November 4, 2012 11:55pm CST
I felt bad yesterday because this friend of mine just texted me to ask for help financially.Since I lost my job and not yet starting with my new one,I do not have any money of my own.I texted her back explaining my current situation.The next day, she texted me again, this time, asking for a smaller amount.This made me furious because I made it clear to her about what I am going through.With this, I just realized that this friend of mine always do this and she only remembers me when she needs something from me and this realization made me mad.I do want to elaborate on this.Do you have a friend like this or do you know anybody like this?
5 Nov 12
I do know people like that. It may not be about money. It may be about people asking for advice. I have a legal background so some people will suddenly contact me to ask for legal advice. I feel worse if the person is one I was close to when we were still seeing each other a lot, but who I do not see a lot anymore (such as old schoolmates or workmates); and I tried in the past to keep in touch with them by texting or sending messages through email or social media networking sites, but received only shot/lukewarm replies. Then, they suddenly remember me when they need something. Worse, when they ask for help, it is not usually the "i have a ready answer for that" time of questions but one which would require me to do some research. I just feel bad that I am spending my time replying to them, but they never took the time to keep in touch with me when I tried to keep in touch with them.
5 Nov 12
I also categorized my friends as to their affinity to me.They are the true and everlasting friend,a neighbor friend,a friend with benefit,and friends when you have money.Your friend falls in the friend with benefit category because you are just called up for he has financial needs.If he was already done with you just take note to make also a suggestion to do what he have done to you.Let us see if he can also help you,if not do not try to see him ever since because he is a bad influence in your life.
7 Nov 12
Hi berting, As much as possible I do not want to label my friends, but I guess with the way she treats me, putting that label on her would not really hurt and I think somehow I am acting this way because of the way she treats me.Thank you for your response:)
• United States
5 Nov 12
It really is annoying how some people can really be so inconsiderate to put you on the spot like that even if she knows your situation. But then, maybe she's just desperate and she badly needed the money for, let's say an emergency? If that's the case then it's pretty understandable. But if she's just doing it out of her own selfish reasons or for something that's not really a necessity, and worse, if she do this all the time, then yeah that is so out of line. And yes, I have experienced "friends" who only remember to talk to me whenever they need something from me but come payback time, they wouldn't respond to me anymore or worse, they would act as if I'm the one who's bothering them. I just make sure to have nothing to do with them anymore, and that they will never be able to borrow from me again. It's sad that some friends will let money get in the way of friendship. But you can't stay mad at them for long, since you know better, just move on and learn from the experience.
4 Dec 12
Hi, I observed you started discussion under interest "Loyal Friend"lol I think your friend is very very loyal when she need money, ha ha Jokes apart, don't mad at such type of friends, the best is say no if you are not in position to help. May be, that friend actually in deep trouble, and expecting favor from you, may be she think you can able to help her. We always ask from where have hope that this friend is going to help me. I believe in friendship, best is stay away from financial transaction as this is one big reason when friendship breaks and bring lot of negativity in the relationship.
11 Dec 12
Hi Life, I thought I was the "loyal friend"...Haha..I also do not want money to get in the way of friendship but I think it was just too much that I can handle.To tell you honestly, just yesterday she texted me again with the same problem.I was calmer then and felt sorry for her.I texted her back and was sorry that I could not help her again this time.I think she did understand. Thank you for your response:)
5 Nov 12
I have encountered such scenarios with a few friends of mine; as always I make clear to them of what I mean. But because am not someone who will run to them just because I don't have money they always imagine, money is available with me. And when they insist I go silent till they get somewhere else to quench their money need.
5 Nov 12
I do know someone like that and I know how you feel! There are just some people who only think about themselves and don't listen to reasons of the other. There was also a friend of mine who would go asking for money and she'd do it when she knows it's payday. Well, recently, my workload was slashed and thus my pay was slashed too but she still persisted to borrow. I told her that my funds are slashed right now and yet she keeps on saying that she'll pay back - which she rarely does. Anyhow, I would just tell her I can't until she stopped. Have a great mylot experience ahead!