Looking for love

United States
November 9, 2012 4:03pm CST
Are you a person that looks for love or do you let love find you? I use to look for love and would easily get my heart broken. I would "think" I would meet the "right " person and it would never work out. I think it was because I wanted to be loved so much. Then I went through a phase where I was independent and didn't want a relationship. I was getting use to this way of life and was content but really still wanted to be in a serious relationship. Then the man of my dreams walked into my life and wanted a serious relationship, and I was use to not being in one. Then I decided to let my guard down and go with this relationship. I've now been happily married to this man for almost 4 years and I'm finally complete!
6 people like this
21 responses
@911Ricki (13602)
• Canada
9 Nov 12
I know so many who throw themselves at men, and in the end they get railroaded and keep in this cycle. I have never been one like this, I sit back and wait. I like being by myself, and independent. Now if someone came alone,and really caught me off guard I would jump at it, but wouldnt throw my entire life down the toilet. I have one friend who would move across the country for a man, she dated a guy for 2 weeks and now pregenent and hes long gone. I think people like this have a lot of issues in life they need to fix, and they try to fix it by bringing someone else in.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Nov 12
Totally agree with you! I had a friend too that just doesn't seem like she was happy unless she had a man or different men in her life. I think in ways she was jealous of me, because I wasn't in any relationship. But she had lived her life like this for so long, I don't even think she knew who she was. Thanks for joining in this discussion!
1 person likes this
@911Ricki (13602)
• Canada
10 Nov 12
Exactly, I know a handful of people that have nothing to show for themselves but a man. They skip to a new man every so many months, and never seem to ahve anything else to be happy about in life. I knwo a girl from college has been like this, jumping man to man, even being pregnent with one man then going to another, even if these man treat her badly. She always talks about guys and message me saying oh yea so and so are so happy then a week later break up, get back together. A girl I went to high school with always talks about her boyfriend, to the point I dont even talk to her anymore because I seriously dont care about her boyfriend. She has nothign to show for herself, or done anything for herself but her boyfriend. I personally dont want a life like that.
• United States
10 Nov 12
I have been happily divorced for almost 20 years. I am independent and self-supporting. I would absolutely love it if 'love' found me, but I can assure you that I wouldn't seek a companion. The idea of having someone to grow old with, is long since gone, but it would be nice to have someone to share an occasional cup of coffee.
@jaiho2009 (39079)
• Philippines
9 Nov 12
I am not looking for love, but if the right one comes along- that would be a bonus for me. I have been through the most painful experience when it comes to love and I don't think I can cope up with another pain. So, love or looking for someone is not my priority at this time. I am not closing any possibilities- let it come and time will tell Congrats on your happy married life
• United States
10 Nov 12
I agree with you! Other than being married to my husband the best time of my life was when I wasn't in a relationship. It was time I did my soul searching then and it was great to know I didn't have to be in a relationship, even though I knew my life wasn't totally complete. Thanks for joining in on this discussion!
@flygrl (15)
10 Nov 12
i think love come from our deep in side. love it's just not about somebody love you or not but i think it's about how you see the love from another way.if you felt happy, love will come to you forever. ok, this is what i am thinking about love. we must more appreciate all the thing in our live. that's it.
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
10 Nov 12
I am happily single! I have never been married and never want to be! I grew up thinking and being told that was the way it was! After years of thinking that and looking for love,I said no more! I have been hurt to many times and must of the time I end up with losers! I think I thought these guys were not that bad when I should of turned around and walked the other way! I have discovered men are not meant to be in my life! They are way to much work! They can't or won't try to understand me! I can't deal with select hearing! I have been taken advantage of! I don't really know how to work on a relationship and I turn into my mother which is not good! I have looked for love and not for love. I have been in love but I know I never will be again! Even if a guy would come in my life I am going to say no. It would turn my life upside down! I don't want that and I am sure he wouldn't want his life to revolved around me,which would be what I want! So it isn't going to happen!
• United States
14 Nov 12
I'm sorry you have dated the wrong men it can sometimes hurt I married the wrong guy but holding out hope
@mariaperalta (19097)
• Mexico
9 Nov 12
I prefer to let love find me. So where is he? I really have never looked for love. Or I sure looked for it in all the wrong places.
• United States
10 Nov 12
That's when you get burnt on looking for love.. when you find it in all the wrong places. Once you give up searching it will find you. Thanks for joining in this discussion!
• United States
12 Nov 12
I never looked for love. I never thought it was for me. Then my ex came along. I thought I was in love but it wasn't love for him. He disappeared. I had a dear friemd show me my worth and just when I said and Meant I want to find love, the man of my dreams found me. I thought he would be leaving me but he didn't! Now I am truly happy.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
11 Nov 12
I am very happy for you. If it happens to me so be it....but I am not really looking. I have lived by myself so long I am not sure I would be able to change things where I could actually give of myself to someone. I have habits and do things I don't want to give up. Maybe if the right person did come along that would change. I don't know for sure.....but I am very happy for you!
• Malaysia
10 Nov 12
I'm a person that accept someone love, and then develop my feelings to accept it and love them back. In that way, I will not an unrequited love. But now I think that that just a naive thinking of mind.
@dragon54u (31301)
• United States
10 Nov 12
I'm very glad you've found the right person! I'm not looking and if love knocked on my door I probably would not answer. I had a fairly long, unhappy marriage preceded by a string of bad relationships--my fault because I always pick the wrong type of guy. I don't know why and until I do and can correct that defect I'm not interested in a relationship. In fact, life is so great without a love relationship that I can't believe it's something I ever wanted so badly! I have my children, my dogs, my interests and my siblings and extended family. I'm very happy. I'm glad you are, too! Everyone has different needs or it would be a boring world.
• Philippines
10 Nov 12
i been looking for love before but like you i always got hurt then i let love finds me im not looking for love then theres a man who come and offering his love now im happy the relation i have with him now is very strong im not married yet but oneday and im praying that it will lead to happy ending
@aerous (13475)
• Philippines
10 Nov 12
That's great to know about the success of your relationship, my friend. I wish you all the best and hope that marriage will be stay forever.
• Philippines
10 Nov 12
I want love find me but many of my friends are telling me to stop the old ways of finding love and I need to work for it. I am happy that you found the person that will complete you. I hope that relationship last and you will get strong despite the odds that life brings. As I said, I hope love will find me or just give me a sign if I need to work on something to find my future other half. I love being single but I get worry when I grow old and still single. I do not want to live alone, forever alone. I want someone to take care of me and of course I want an offspring.
@Raine38 (8907)
• United States
10 Nov 12
I'm no longer looking for love because I have found it in the form of my husband. But before then, I used to actively look for love that I end up meeting the wrong ones. Good thing I was so cautious to not let any of it progress any further whenever I see the red flags. After a while, I just got tired and decided to concentrate on my career and accepted a work abroad. Little did I realize that that's where I will meet my husband. After 6 long years of being single, he's right there and the right one for me as well. So in my opinion, love is like the wind, you can't catch it, you can't see it, but when it's there you will feel it without any hint of warning. Just be ready to enjoy its presence, take care of it and who knows, it might not leave you at all. (Well, of course, the presence of the wind literally might not be good all the time, lol!)
@iMamom (321)
• Philippines
10 Nov 12
Yes true, We need to have a man to complete our life, Happy and contented. I have been through the same path, i was the one looking atfirst and then end up broken hearted, then i learned to love my self more. I was single for awhile, but I was also open to new friends and know them until I met my man,I am not married yet but we are happy.He finds me special for being independent and someone he can count on.
10 Nov 12
Hi Jodee 1st of all, congrats for being happily married .As they always say,it's a TIME FACTOR which decides all course of our life.Though its always advisable to get married still fate equally plays a great role in our life.sometime when we search for something desperately in life, we don't get that easily or some people end up with bitter experience also.But good that, you followed your instinct and it's like ONCE BITTEN TWICE NOT SHY KIND OF. But when we stop searching that ,that ultimately falls in our kitty.I guess same happened with you too.ALL THE LUCK.. CHEERS...)
@Shavkat (43884)
• Philippines
10 Nov 12
I let the love finds me. I don't look for love anymore. If I feel it was the right person, then I go along with the flow. Good day!
@silentwill (1686)
• Philippines
10 Nov 12
Well I am done waiting. I let it find me but nothing came. It's time now to take action and take it to my hands and find that elusive love.
• United States
10 Nov 12
after today with what has happened here with my daughter, I am done with all of it.. Just tired.. very tired. You give, you love, you hurt... that is all it has been for me. I have tried to not love and it comes knocking.. I am tired.. I feel all I am is a burden .. so so so tired.. Advice is, take care of you, because no one truly will love you the way you need to be loved.
@sjvenden27 (1851)
• United States
10 Nov 12
I had a brief moment in my live when I was looking.. It didnt turn out.. I think it is better when I am just doing what I need to do.. And one day hopefully someone will just enter my life.. But not anytime soon; I am not emotionally ready.. I have my own things that I need to focus on.. I do not need to add to my load.. Congratulations to you; I am so happy that you found the right man for you
@BarBaraPrz (16863)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
10 Nov 12
I've never looked for love to complete me. I'm an entity in myself. Occasionally, I'll share (parts of) my life with someone, but I'm content with my rich interior life.