Band aid pulled...

United States
November 10, 2012 5:16pm CST
I had a response to a post I put up a month or so ago. I thought perhaps I would update on the situation. The truce between my husband and his father fell apart in just over two weeks. My poor husband got dragged into his brother's drama but refused to be a part of it. He (my brother in law not hubby) was arrested again. My in-laws (who moved across the country and can no longer do everything for my brother in law) wanted my husband to bail his brother out of jail. (in another state over 120 miles away) For one thing we did not have the money, the second it was for a beating on his soon to be ex wife, the son who tried to stop him (10 by the way) and his mistress who also tried to stop his drug and alcohol fueled fit. The women where both hospitalized and the son has a broken rib. Money or not hubby would not have bailed him out. His father believes the women are lying, none to mind the people who called the cops and the mall cop (he ran into the ex and kids at the mall while with the mistress and was mad that he got caught not taking the kids when it was his weekend sighting he was working. My father in law, he will never see the truth of his middle son)who took him down, and we should have paid the money. My husband said no and now his father refuses to talk to him. There isn't much you can do when it turns like this. My husband though is taking it better this time around. He has tried all he can and knows he has tried it.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@jenny1015 (13394)
• Philippines
19 Nov 12
It is a tough situation to be caught in the middle. And I guess not unless your father in law sees your brother in law' fault, then the strain between your husband and your father in law will remain. Bringing them back together is something that is hard to do and may not be in your hands no matter how much effort you put into it. Besides, the cause of all these problems is your brother in law. He needs to change his ways, apologize to all of you and then , maybe, the harmony that their family had will be back.
• United States
22 Nov 12
I have no hope of my BIL changing. He has only gotten worse over the 17 years I have known him...sadly everytime we think it can't get worse it does.
@jenny1015 (13394)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I also have some "weird " relationship between my brothers in law. I've gotten fights with them. But I have learned to just live with that "weirdness", anyway they are all good to my kids. Miss O, it's beyond your control if he chooses to remain the same. The important thing is your relationship with your husband i strong and you are always there to support him.
@Shellyann36 (7447)
• United States
12 Nov 12
Wow it sounds as if your BIL is bad news. I don't blame your hubby for not bailing him out. I understand that it probably hurts your hubbys feelings that your FIL is being this way but honestly your hubby did the right thing. He has to stand by his decision and if the FIL can't see that it is the right thing than it is probably best that they don't talk for a while. My Mama is the same way with my youngest sister. She is several years younger than I am and my Mama thinks she walks on water. I just let it all go. I know I am the one who will be looking after her and my Daddy when they get old and can't do for themselves.
• United States
12 Nov 12
we where really most concerned for my nephew. He is 10 and was brave enough to try to stop that maniac. My husband took him out for ice cream and talked to him about it, (yes he would drive that far for his nephew) and he is emotionally having a hard time dealing with this. Frankly my FIL can bite me.
• United States
13 Nov 12
I bet he is having a hard time. Any child would have a hard time with that type of abuse going on. Kudos to your hubby for going to check on him. I agree about the FIL!
@ANTIQUELADY (36491)
• United States
11 Nov 12
Your fil is being ridiculous & treating your husband very badly. I wouldn't bail his sorry butte out either. It's sad when people are blinded by the meaness in their children. I love both my sons very much but if they acted like that they's sit their buttes in jail.I know how your husband feels. My parents were partial to others to.
@ANTIQUELADY (36491)
• United States
12 Nov 12
I hope your husband will not be too hurt over this. From experience it gets old after awhile & u just have to decide if they are mad at u, oh well & if they aren't oh well.
@bretay61 (723)
• United States
12 Nov 12
I am glad he is taking it better this time.And I definitely don't blame him for not bailing him out.He needs to pay for what the has done.Maybe his father will come around one day,if not he knows he has tried and that's all he can do.Good luck to you and your family
• United States
12 Nov 12
I am glad too because life was hard with his father's mistreatment's weighing on his mind, it ate him up from the inside and I really hope that doesn't happen again.