why the teens are after the cellphones???

@viju0410 (2286)
India
November 17, 2012 1:57am CST
Hi friends and lotters, The advanced technology has changed our lifestyle a bit (or a lot) especially the cell phones, but that is affecting the younger ones in a bad way. Recently one of my neighbor boys lost his newly purchased cell phone (during the festive celebrations among his friends). What surprised us is that the phone was stolen by another teenager boy who was his friend (best friend). Similarly, during the first week of this month, one of my daughter’s friend (in her teens of course) took away a Nokia handset (which was not working properly but usable) from my home. When we wanted to discuss this matter to her parents, they responded in a very bad manner saying why we allowed her to get into my house. Ok, I’m not going to bore you more but I would like to know why the teens today are behaving / misbehaving with their own friends in this way? Can they come out of such habits in future? What should be the parent’s role here??? Your take. Happy weekend and happy lotting to all...
5 people like this
29 responses
@bluespygirl (2112)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
As to your question, why are teens after the cellphones? I think it is not just the kids but almost all people whatever age is. Cell phone used to have a call then text features and as long as it is able to connect. But nowadays, it became a fad or status symbol. Like, if you have this kind of cellphone and brand, you are in or there is a different kind of regard to some people. What a world that we are in now! Most adults I believe can't maximize the use of their cellphone. I mean, some aren't using the planners, for example and so many other applications. I have known some people, you know. The kid's parents who stole the not so good but working cell phone sounds like the local officials here. My cell phone was stolen by a kid too just a few weeks ago (but was returned) and the officials told me that same thing. You shouldn't alow the kid or anybody in your house so that you will not lost things. So maybe the police think it was my fault to be stolen?
@Hatley (164464)
• Garden Grove, California
18 Nov 12
oh my gosh thats so silly in other words my child is a thief so yo u must not let her in your home, not "oh my gosh I will make her bring that cellphone back and make her apologize to you. I am so sorry."teens still need discipline and rulesd and boundaries. Parents must be held ;iable too for teends misbehavior as those are their children.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Nov 12
I wish parents will be held liable for their kids bad actions..
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi blue, Good that you got it back. Here, we didn't go to police as those formalities are a lengthier process and we only warned that girl not to repeat such acts. Hi Hatley, agreed. Discipline should be taught.
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
18 Nov 12
I wish I knew the answer viju, but we know that some people are definately not taught by their parents the right and wrong way to behave and act while in the presence of other, even friends..Now I am not blaming the parents for all the misbehaving or teenager but something is wrong...because all teenagers do not have theft in their heart or minds.. May grandson was at his football practice one afternoon and someone went into the locker room and stole a brand new pair of sneakers from him,,,Now they just stole the sneakers, I am sure because they were new not because they were my grandsons, but who would do that..and wh child could go home with a new pair of sneakers and the parent dosen't question it...??? there would be no way my grandson could come him with something like a cell phone or sneakers and his mother would let him keep it...
2 people like this
@Hatley (164464)
• Garden Grove, California
18 Nov 12
trhi teens are still not adults and parents need to parent them . if my teen camed home with an expensive cellphone that I knew he or she did not buy I would want to know where my teen got this. Then he or she and I would march over to the real owner of said phone and return it and the teen would apologize and mean' it too.Parents cannot keep letting kids off the hook as a misdemeanor now can turn into a felony really quickly. no teen should feel if I want it or need it I will just take it.Morals and values must be taught all through the teens so you have a young adult who knows right from wrong.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, It s really hurting to know not only in here but such problems are global. Right, as how can a parent teach their ward to do wrong things...
@gunsing (142)
• Indonesia
18 Nov 12
we should always consider the economic condition of the family. sadly to say that kids from family with less fortune tends to do that. you know kids, they always want what their friends have. so if their parents can't afford what they want, they will try to get it with their own effort (stealing etc.) so parents role, is to give children understanding about the situation, make them proud with what we have and never look at what other people have; what we have is more important.
2 people like this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, Ok, if it is the economic / financial conditions - the boy's from well to do family and girl's family think /behaves as they are the richest among everyone in our neighborhood. And both these kids were seen with pockets full of money sometime earlier..... oh, now i also think it that way, may be they took some money from their houses.
@glenng01 (71)
• Philippines
18 Nov 12
This problem with the teens today are quite disturbing. This is not just an issue of stealing phones. A simple demeanor like this could turn into a felony someday and I think parents should not be tolerating this kind of behavior if they really want their kids to have a good future. I think teens do these kind of things because it gives them confidence if they do it and gets away with it with their parents backing them up most of time.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, Welcome to mylot and i am sure you are enjoying a happy ride here. Rightly said, some of the habits are disturbing. But i really wish/ed the kids realize their mistakes sooner and not repeat such things in future.
@thesids (22351)
• Bhubaneswar, India
17 Nov 12
Hi viju And on that I recall you planning to buy a Nokia for your daughter after her class Xth exams. This is what the complexity is. See, the cellphone is no doubt a necessity today despite all its evils. Now for your question - the teens and even youngers - are more addicted to technology, music and songs, video clips, MMS, SMS, FM, Camera and of course Internet. You will NOT find a simple cellphone in their hands instead they all would want to use those smart phones which come pre-bundled with all these. Marketing techniques of today are tempting and luring - the adults and grown-ups too fall prey to them, so what about kids and teens! And also, carrying a latest model is considered hip and in even at the school students... so college students care more as they get better opportunities to buy things of their own preference. Parents can do nothing much here, because they want their kids to have cell phones so that they can contact them - these days the terrorist activities, mishaps on the roads and so many other things make life insecure and cellphone services are easier available almost everywhere - so this was the primary reason these gadgets became successful here in India. And RIM made them available @ throwaway prices - and the addiction started... now today, it is just feeding and living to that addiction. The future - More illnesses for all.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Hi Sid Only planning – right? But does that mean she should steal someone else’s handset now? I agree, but these stolen handsets did not have many features dear. I worry more about the habits of these teens rather the handsets. You know these kids even use a dual sim (one for girl friend/boyfriend and another for family & relatives). I am not saying it is wrong for the parents to give cell phones to the kids but why they are forgetting to teach phone etiquettes then? Plus, if there is complaint from other parents about my kids, should I not listen to them when the complaint is genuine? The earlier response of Professor - chatting and cheating!!! Anyways, what's there for lunch?? Have a nice time.
@thesids (22351)
• Bhubaneswar, India
17 Nov 12
Its already near 4:00 pm and I havent yet my lunch... feeling hungry but nothing in the kitchen to eat. Lazy me I wanted to have chowmein and rice - my all time favorite. But then neither there is any noodles in the home nor any other thing that could go with it... and hence I havent cooked. had only 8 slices of bread stuffed with potato mash and lots of tomato sauce... now waiting for the evening and go out (i have to buy some blank DVDs to take backups, and would also sneak to the stall for some good snacks). Many parents do not have time these days and also they know they cannot tell anything rude to their kids... it is illegal here these days and so who cares. But then they need to show off that they genuinely care for their children and hence the one on the discussion told you odd things instead of seeing your point which was genuine. I dont know if it is hungry me or anything else... but I am unhappy with what India is becoming.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Sid , Why are u fasting dear? Why didn't u make some masala rice and forget the chowmein for a while. Don't eat too much from outside its not good for u, but i can join for those snacks as i'm not much bothered about aining weight. I know we are unhappy with certain things which are beyond our control but we fell prey to the game silently.... Now my two cents - please get Protienx powder /GRD and drink it with a glass of milk, hot or cold. Eat some fruits and take care too.
@jeztrose (1405)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
Well teenagers nowadays always wants to be "in" on modern technologies. they don't want to be left behind. therefore it somehow makes them jealous that the other teens have that gadget when they don't have.In that case they find some ways to have it even in the wrong way.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Hi, yes, but the handsets were just the normal ones without much features and net connection. Don't you think so the parents should teach the kids for such behaviors. Jealousy is something that multiplies if not properly understood and controlled at all levels.
@jeztrose (1405)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
Yes parents are the one very responsible for this situation. maybe their parents didn't guide them or giving them discipline.Parents have big roles in children's life, they must influence their child to be a good one. At this point maybe their parents just let them do what they want. there is no guidance i can tell.But you said you talked to their parents and yet they got angry? that just proves that they have a bad role model to begin with.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
HI, That's exactly what this girl's (my daughter's friend) parents did. They behaved very badly and they said it is our fault that we let her enter our house. Now how can we stop my daughter's friends visiting her at home? More so, that was not the first time she came to our house she comes very often but we never thought she would do away with the handset. I don't like the parents who are supporting to their kids even in mistakes. I think that will encourage the kid to commit more mistakes then...
@sonusd (1548)
• India
17 Nov 12
Mobile phone was being used just to be in touch with your near and dear but now days there are so many additional features have been added like net surfing, playing games, calculator etc, so instead of going any where else one can done all his work from his mobile phone tahts why n0ow days not only youth many people are too much acquainted with mobile phones.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Hi, I agree with you but why the teens are developing a habit of 'stealing' the cell phone even from their own friends. And the parents are also behaving with an attitude of 'who cares' that make us upset.
@mydanods (6747)
• Nigeria
18 Nov 12
cellphones are kind of a status thing among teens. i think the cellphone must have been stolen for status or due to envy.
• Bangladesh
18 Nov 12
Teenagers are very much fond of romance. And most spices of romance are available in cellphones. At their age they get very attached to listening audio video music,chatting, messaging, interneting. Speaking the truth, these stuffs are their realm of thinking. Aside from this there developes a juvenile delinquency at teen age. Tendency of stealing other thing is perhapes due to this delinquency. Their parents should think over their age and its tendency. They should guide them and control their behavior. Parents should help teem agers build a sound environment to live within. I would say there is nothing any good in using cellphones. Rather cellphones distracts them from their studies. Cellphones exploits much mental energy and patience and turning them into blunt and indifferent to their studies gradually. For studies there must be a concentrated mind. And so far as we can we must remove all kinds of distractions from teenages and help them live in distractionless and nuisance less constructive enviroment. Stay fine.
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
I think that for kids to be behaving that way towards their own friends mean that they are really NOT THEIR FRIENDS. How can a dear friend so such a thing, right? Obviously they just took advantage of your kid' friendliness and had the intention if stealing the phone.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Hi, Yes, I too personally felt that way. If they are friends they can’t harm you. Rightly said, they took the advantage of this friendliness and misused the freedom which was given to them as friends. Now in the neighborhood, everyone would keep certain distance not only to these teens but even to their parents as well.
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
18 Nov 12
What kind of parents are they? Have you reported it to the police? And did you ever got your son' cellphone back? I think that kid needs some discipline. His parents should be ashamed of themselves on how they reacted to you when you told them about what happened. Who in the right mind of answer that way? If his kid was brought up properly, he would not even think of getting something that is not his, most especially from someone who takes him as a friend.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
20 Nov 12
No jenny, Haven't reported to police but we did give clear warning in case she restarts something. You know we got upset with the parent's behaviour but we didn't make any issue- my husband says not only the child but her parents too hav some discipline disorder/s....
@Mavic123456 (15224)
• Thailand
18 Nov 12
Cellphones? it is one of the easiest things to get from a person. It is small, usable and saleable. Not just teenagers are tempted to take them because they are there at hand. Eye catching if we say that right. It just happened that you have experienced and witnessed it twice that teenagers were the culprit of stealing. Sad to hear such stories. Well parents' role? Does bringing up the children play a big part on this behavior? Again, it is hard to be parents, your child's fault and it's you who are blamed. Such a challenge for parents. The manner on how they answered you really shows that they are tolerating the behavior of the child. Denial. They responded that way, in defense that "hey, my daughter is not a thief" and the daughter got away with it. Instead of verifying if the daughter really took it and why she took it. Yes, a small clepomaniac may become a big time swindler or thief in the future. The behavior of stealing is tolerated and let go without any corresponding corrections. They should have corrected the act itself. They should have expound on the idea of "why she took it" Will it be because of envy of having same too, or for money because she will sell it. If money why does she need the money? Wasn't she given enough or does she need anything to buy? Parents' role, ask why she did it.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, I liked your response Mav. Yu rightly pointed out, not only teens but i had witnessed a few adults involved in mobile stealing. One of my ex colleague got her new cell and she left the phone on her office desk and was away to washroom. Can you believe the cell was gone within those few minutes and there was only one other fellow with her in her cabin. This girl once had enough money at one stage - she used to tell her paents give her lot of money... but it might be possible that noticing the girl's changed behaviour, her parents has stopped the pocket money as she did it for some addl money...
@Mavic123456 (15224)
• Thailand
19 Nov 12
Happy to know that you liked my point of view. Well that's how and what people are and we don't have any control on it. Just dont show them things that may attract their attention and tempt to take. Well that's it, maybe the girl is in trouble The more parents should ask the daughter what she did it instead of blaming you.
@murkie (1105)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
being in the teen years is that period in our lives where we tant to be accepted by our peers. an since cellphones are the trend these days, it just seems right to think that teenagers are on to it. they'll do anything just not to be ridiculed for being not "in" with the crowd.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, Yes,that is one point but to be in the crowd they just forget the values of good/ right or wrong doings. It is really amazing that they (kids & teens/pre teens) have more info about all the updates and upgraded versions of cell or iphones/ipads or even laptop to Windows 8.
@murkie (1105)
• Philippines
20 Nov 12
they know the latest updates because they are anticipating it. maybe it's hard for a teen to be the last one to know about new technology. well, i wasn't like that when i was at that age. maybe your teens will just outgrow the habit. hopefully.
@joycseer (845)
• Malaysia
17 Nov 12
Hi viju0410, this has become a concern to many parents i suppose. Cellphones nowadays are not like the mobiles we used to have last time. Nowadays many are using smartphones which enables them to play quality graphic games, and surfing the net. Not only teens are after cellphones, you may say they are living completely with the phones itself. You can actually see many teens playing on phones during meal times, outings with family, in the car and everywhere they go. They do not communicate with family members or friends, but rather looking at the phone all the time. This comes from peer pressure, and influence of the current society living towards that kind of style. Many people couldn't live without touching their phone. Technologies advances has its advantages and disadvantages. =) The parents do bear the responsibility to watch out for their kids not to over dwell in cellphones which affect their studies and so on. As long as they have proper control in usage, things should be fine.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, And i suppose these features are rather attracting the kids and teens towards it in a negative way. That's another problem with the kids, they don't know how to control themselves nor their parents teach them to Ctrl. liked your views.
@joycseer (845)
• Malaysia
19 Nov 12
Yes, that's true. Many who doesn't practice self-control would easily fall into the trap and phone attraction. It is very important to educate the children to have discipline if they want to own a mobile phone. Actually kids nowadays owns a mobile is because seems like it was the parent who wanted to buy a phone for their kids. Their intention was actually for them to be able to find their kids especially during emergency. But because of kids being no self control, it turn out bringing negative impact to them.
@Sreekala (23768)
• India
17 Nov 12
Dear viju, Mobile phone has its own advantages and disadvantages. The advantages are, it is easy to reach a person through mobile. This is the reason most of the parents do not mind to buy a mobile phone for their children. They just think about the advantage part only. Moreover, many parents blindly believe their children too (they are best and never do any wrong acts). It is hard to live without having the technologies at the present scenario. Regarding the stealing activity, I think parents can do something here but surely from the beginning. Parents should watch their kids from the first day of their schooling, if they bring any thing which is not belong to them then should enquire where they got it, if he/she taken from class or anybody’s bag in class, it should be returned the next day. Here experts are saying no need to scold or spank kids for this activity as they didn’t realize the wrong acts. But parents can make them understand the fault in a lovely way. If it stops from the beginning then I don’t think anyone will ready to steal anything later in their life. I heard many stories; some parents didn’t bother if their child brings any pencil, eraser or sharpener which belongs to other students. This may be small thing but the base should start from here. My son told me an incident happened in his class. One of his friends brings a mobile phone in class which costs 35,000 rupees. The friend’s mother was admitted in hospital so she sent mobile with this boy for some communication. But when bell rings in class time teacher caught the boy and taken the mobile with her. Teacher also asked to this boy come with parents then only she will return the mobile.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Dear Sree, Yeah i agree with you absolutely and I used to tell my children not to bring other’s things (like pencil, box, lunch etc) to home. Parent can make them understand by explaining rights and wrongs. But negligence or ignorance is not appreciated at all. Oh no, the mother could always speak to the school authorities in case of emergencies and why send such a costly phone to school. Thanks for adding more details here.
1 person likes this
@Sreekala (23768)
• India
17 Nov 12
When my elder son got admission in Nursery, the school authorities given strict instructions to all parents. They requested, if any child bring any item to home which belongs to school or other kids, do not scold or spank the child, instead ask the child to return it on next day to the class teacher. The negligence comes, some parents think it is a minor thing, but the point is we are teaching something worth to our child by asking the same to return it.
@jaiho2009 (39001)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
This is so sad, how a parent can say such a word :xxx Schools here in our country (not sure of every school has same policy- but mostly do) do not allow their kids to bring mobile phones especially the small kids. Good with the bigger ones as they know how to take care of their things already- though,still there are instances of thief/stolen phones at school and outside school premises. Kids stole mobile phones for different reasons, but most probable reason is money. They sell the stolen phone to have easy money and I can say that, doing so will likely to lead into habitual- and later to bigger things. Parents are responsible for these and whatsoever with their kids behavior -today and the future. So sad that sometimes parents neglect to see these things properly. Have a great weekend dear
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
17 Nov 12
Hi Jai Even I thought it could be for money but then the boy always had lot of money in his pocket, which I have seen many times and I also told him, he should open a bank account and carry an ATM but he replied that his mother gives him whatever amount is asked for (seems people around me are strange but with their own policies and principles……). Again, if he took away in a playing mood (prank) , he could have returned the next morning before we file police report/ block the sim etc etl. Can't really blame the kids nor their parents....
@jaiho2009 (39001)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
Hope he is just doing some prank... :x
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, Not only teens even small children are fond of cell phone .If any one uses it once they are willing to continue it.May be because of new features and contact through cell.Hope this does not make people addict to cell phones
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi friend, The phones were without much featues though. However we as adults need to give the teens and kids a proper guidance. Happy lotting and welcome to mylot.
• Uganda
18 Nov 12
i think the problem could be from their parents who never taught them that taking someone's property without his permission is bad and punishable. so these kids grow up with no manners at all. it an obligation to sit with their children and try to talk to them and teach them how to respect other people's properties or buy their children those gadgets.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, Nice to have your view here. Seems to be a parental error as well but we never know what's in the minds of teens as none of the parent would teach them doing anything wrong...
@williamjisir (22903)
• China
18 Nov 12
The girl's parents should not say rude words like this. It will only make the girl further misbehave like this if they don't educate her properly. The parents' role is very important in being a learning model for them. I wish her parents to be conscious of this serious case with her and say sorry to you.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, The parents of the girl are too proud and i have lost respect or regard for them, though i only used to exchange a smile or a little hi, hello only.
@Hatley (164464)
• Garden Grove, California
18 Nov 12
hi viju first off a lot of parents get too lax with teens but if I were a parent and was told that my daughter had taken a cellphone from your home that did not belong to her I would see that my daughter brought it back at once and apologized to you also.Letting teens get away with taking what does not belong to them is just teaching them they can take stuff thats not theirs just because they want it o need it,in essence contributing to the delinquency of a minor you own kid.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, I'm also like you and i do give proper attention to whatever my kids talk and give them good/bad examples for explaining values to them. At times i have to make stories so they grow up to be good persons with good values and morales.
17 Nov 12
Hi, it's up to jealousy. Children today are very jealous of the kids who have something better and really envy them for that. And that is why even though someone is your best friend because of that he will steal something from you. For me i could not considere someone as a best friend if he steal something from you. Paretns are very mistaken in the role of the child's school because he was not sufficiently explained that materiality is not everything.
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, Welcome to mylot and hope you are having a great time here. It is hurting especially when the trusted friends behave in such a bad manner with us. Definitely being jealous will not take them to suceed but once they need to understand their mistake or someone (parents) should make them understand.
@Smokinq (41)
• Bulgaria
17 Nov 12
Unfortunately, nowadays more and more we hear about the aggression of young Internet and more advanced technologies that greatly contribute to In everyday life often parents do not pay enough attention to their children and this causes side effects It is very important and children in what environment move Because not only the parents are at fault for the behavior of their children More parents need to talk to them and be friendly so will boost their confidence and they will learn to share with parents
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Hi, May be you are right as most of the parents are with dual income and they are not able to give quality time for their kids. That's more important to talk to them and boost confidence. i agree fully.
@Cutie18f (9563)
• Philippines
17 Nov 12
Yeah, I know. They lose these gadgets very quickly because their very own friends are stealing them. Moral lesson: don't buy them expensive phones. Give them second-hand cheap phones.
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
19 Nov 12
Yes, its a good option to provide them a cheaper ones but again with specific instructions of 'do's & don'ts.