i fall in love with a man who have married, how should i do?

China
November 26, 2012 7:54am CST
recently, due to the work, i make friend with one of my client. at first,everyday we have to communicate with the job,but later we can talk in personal matters. and in our free time,he invited me eating or walking or playing golf,he is handsome and lots of money,also he is a gentle man,he treat me like a baby and princess,i like his humor and mature,but he have married,his wife isn't in this country.i can not hurt a woman also a mother,but i really love him,how should i do?he said he can not tough me until he divorced and married,i reject him but we also have contact.and i miss him,everyday he gives me a call about 1 hour,i hope i can in his arms.
10 people like this
46 responses
@mariaperalta (19094)
• Mexico
26 Nov 12
First of all, if you were married would you be happy if another woman was with your husband?? I think not. You should have never allowed yourself to even get with a married man. Its not right at all.
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
So true! She already knew from the very start that he's married so she should have avoided him or limit her closeness to her client.
26 Nov 12
Sometimes, its easy said than done! But that does not justify it or give you the luxury of accepting him and fall from the pitfall of wrong feelings. You should make a choice. Destroy a family and be happy or forget about it and move on and then be happy... Its your move!
1 person likes this
@vernaC (1493)
• Romania
26 Nov 12
I suggest that she should not rely on the happiness the man is giving her right now. This happiness is only temporary, there will be problems and heartaches waiting for her is she continue this. I believe there's always someone who can make us, and with the right person, it's so much better.
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (33827)
• Canada
26 Nov 12
If he leaves his wife for you, one day he might leave you for someone else. I was married twice and both wives left me for someone else. Guess what? They also left them for someone else. They are both in a miserable state and I'm a happy single man. It's been tough at times but this is so much better than dealing with women cheating behind my back. If you are that kind of a woman and he is that kind of a man, may God help you both because you need a lot of help!
3 people like this
• India
26 Nov 12
Hi friend, as you know your activity is not good, but you are interested with him and want his relationship. As you mentioned his wife is a mother, so he have a kid with his wife, it is not a good thing to spoil a family, so try your maximum to avoid this relationship, you both are betraying his wife and kid
2 people like this
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
very true i agree, you may get hurt but its better to lose him than be with him but you knew that theirs not only one person who will suffer because of you and him
• India
27 Nov 12
yes, by continuing this relationship which is not good for anyone, better to forget about this person and continue with other activities. Thanks for your support.
1 person likes this
• China
27 Nov 12
Hey girl,I will give you a hint,when a man can get divorce for you,then he also can get divorce with you and get marry will other woman in the future.So may be he just take you as mistress,and actually this phenomenon is quiet normal in our society,many rich man have many mistress in different places.
2 people like this
@AmbiePam (50277)
• United States
27 Nov 12
True. If he wasn't faithful in his first marriage, why the heck would he be faithful in his second?
1 person likes this
@vernaC (1493)
• Romania
26 Nov 12
Didnt you think that this guy is probably just lonely because his wife is not with him? Before you commit yourself in this messy relationship, think ahead of circumstances you will be dealing with. Because even if you succeded in keeping him for yourself, there will always be a connection between him and his wife. Wont you be jealous when they will be together in a planned or unplanned situation? How would you deal your emotion with this? Only you can answer.
2 people like this
@Mavic123456 (15212)
• Thailand
26 Nov 12
so agree, this man is absolutely lonely because of his wife is not around. What if the wife comes back. Is he planning for a divorce? Then let him plan and divorce first before you go deeper in the relationship. Missing him is normal. Just try to distract yourself with different activities. It is hard for you I am sure, but, you need to be strong and tough.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Nov 12
You don't want to be the 'other' woman, do you? This guy is most likely playing you. He has a wife tucked away somewhere and he wants to make time with you. If you are smart you will tell him to get lost.
2 people like this
@myranel (29)
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
First of all, i will not judge you for falling in love with a married man. You are just human. It's just normal to fall in love with a guy who is really nice and seems almost perfect in your eyes. But i just have to ask, is he still in touch with her? Are they still having a good relationship as husband and wife? Are they living together whenever your client is in his country? Because he may be married but already separated or in the process of divorce. You have to clear things first. I think both of you should talk seriously about it. Ask him about his plans. If he really is planning to divorce his wife even before he met you, then you have to wait for it. You need to be tough since you put yourself in this complicated relationship. If he is having an affair with you while still committed to his wife, you better think about it. Put yourself in his wife's situation. What would you feel? Of course it hurts right? You better avoid him but make him understand your reasons. I believe that even if you stay away from him, if he is meant for you, he will come back at a right time. You don't have to rush things. Also, do not focus in him. Entertain other single guys. You never know, you might realize that someone else fits for you.
2 people like this
@somupriti (353)
26 Nov 12
I can not in this way to sacrifice yourself to every one that lookn near to you. Are you a flasid type? Holdon don't breakup some one's heart for the shake of your pleasure and heart. You could be equally hurt in future.
2 people like this
@adnileb (5035)
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
You can answer it by yourself. Just put yourself in the position of his wife. And evaluate your feelings, how would you react if you knew that your husband is dating another girl? Will it be okay to you? I bet you'll be hurt too. So to call it fair, do not fall in love to a married man. There are lots of guys out there, why choose the one who's married anyway? It's not acceptable reason that he's a gentleman with lots of money and treats you like a baby. Think of the other person - his wife. Hope you will do the right thing.
2 people like this
@brew2x (3096)
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
Why did he mention a divorce? Are they separated but not legally yet? I always believe that you should not start a new relationship while you are currently with one. It should end first before starting a new one. If he is really currently in the process of divorce then all you have to do is wait for the right time. If that is not the case then I would suggest that you avoid him, you deserve someone better for that matter.
2 people like this
@gilenie (190)
26 Nov 12
If i where in your shoe i will try to avoid this man, since you knew he is already committed. As early as now try to avoid him yes its hard cos you are starting to fall inlove with him but soon it will be over in time you may be able to move on. You are pretty dont try to ruin a family life, i am sure you soon be able to find that can offer you a marriage. Dont let yourself be hurt. Move on my dear.
• Malaysia
26 Nov 12
Its one of the 10 stupid mistakes a women would do.Of course he make you like a princess so he can get into your skirt. Are you sure you are in love or because his money. Go ahead with the relationship and see where you'll end up
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
26 Nov 12
Are you sure you the only one he seeing
1 person likes this
@Hatley (164465)
• Garden Grove, California
26 Nov 12
hi xx598 97296 If you were his wife how would you like it to have another woman coming after him?Break it off before you get badly hurt or hurt his wife badly .If he could forget he's married with you, what madkes you think he cannot forget you for the next woman.Right you cannot hurt his wife ajd the mother of his child. Forget him, and look elsewhere.You deserve a man who is honest and will be honest with you always.If you want to wait indefinitely hang on to him but you are fooling yourself as He is not going to divorce her. If I were you I would get out of this mess in a split second as you do not want to be a home wrecker. You will meet other men and y ou can love again but for the right reasons the next time.
1 person likes this
• Canada
27 Nov 12
Sadly, Ms. Hatley, I truly feel that the predictor of future behaviour can be plainly seen in the past! I personally feel this is a whim of the male particpant, and this is a game for him, feeding his ego! No commitments, with the "disposable" female participants...He is a rogue, and always will be, and your future is plainly defined in his past behaviour..YOU will be the next lady, he is cheating on! This type of guy, needs to grow up and stop "gaming" with innocent hearts! That's just my take!
@anil02 (3391)
• India
27 Nov 12
If you love him truly forget him. It is good for you and your friend. True love wants sacrifice. He married person and have family. Limit your relation up to friendship.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Nov 12
This man is a cad who has no qualms about cheating on his wife. Why would you think he would be true to you? How do you know he doesn't have other gullible women on the side? Gentle he may be, but he is not a GENTLEMAN. Run, don't walk to the nearest exit and tell him to bug off.
1 person likes this
@alottodo (3061)
• Australia
27 Nov 12
I get your last word [I hope I can be in his arms] and I tell you that you won't be want to be in he's arms and why? he is a cheater not just to you but to his wife as well
1 person likes this
@kokomo (1868)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
You must think for the right one. You are having this adultery and it is a sin. You must consider also the wife's feelings of that guy . She's a woman too and every lady doesn't want to be betrayed by the one we love. So better as early as you can, you should do the right thing and do not let your heart fall deeper to that man.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (50277)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I think you already know the answer to this. Cut off contact with him. This is not a relationship that will go anywhere. They all say they will get a divorce and they never do. If you continue seeing or talking to him in any way, it's going to end in heartbreak for you.
1 person likes this
• India
27 Nov 12
Put your self in his wife's place and thing about the whole thing, I bet you won't like the role you are playing in their life. The worst thing over here is that you know what you are doing is not correct, still you are telling that you like it. If you were really self conscious then you should have move away from him and the relationship.
1 person likes this
@rezax123 (395)
• Norway
27 Nov 12
i think you like his money. or else what is the matter? can't you find other gentleman. his wife made him mature. its easy to use other people's toothbrush. go and find your own man.
1 person likes this