In life we all have our ups & downs, but do you ever feel life is just unfair?

@bizness (841)
United States
November 26, 2012 9:37pm CST
Unfair? Well I guess it just depends. Yes I have felt this way, on a few occasions. I just feel that I work hard and try to do the right thing, be a good friend, and things still don't work out, so yes, sometimes I feel that way. How about you?
1 person likes this
29 responses
@512771751 (1096)
• China
28 Nov 12
It is hard to say that life is fair now. Sometimes you work harder than any other people, but the results may not be good as you think.
1 person likes this
@bizness (841)
• United States
28 Nov 12
First thank you for responding. The results are sometimes good and sometimes not so good but the point is I, or someone else, did actually work for it while others just sit on their butts and do nothing but get more!
1 person likes this
@Mavic123456 (15181)
• Thailand
27 Nov 12
Yes, it it is an inevitable reaction if things not going right as what I expect and plan and thought of. Yes, it is a normal feeling, but now that I older, I try to leave those behind. What can I do if I have been a good friend, and this good friend turn his/her back at me for whatever reasons. What can I do the in spite of working so hard my best wasn't good enough for my boss. I can just leave this behind not to hold them with me so I can move on. If I am unhappy with my friend it just means that he/she is not my friend so why keep. If I am unhappy with my job, then leave instead of whining about how unfair my boss is. Life is indeed unfair, but still I am thankful every morning because I woke up.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I agree 100%! Such wonderful advice! And yes, I too am very grateful that I am allowed to wake yet another morning.
@Mavic123456 (15181)
• Thailand
28 Nov 12
I am so glad for this. this is for you. Go and make your every morning a happy one. make your day a productive one. If they don't want to give you a break, it is okay just move on. Don't hold on it too much. You can do it.
@bizness (841)
• United States
28 Nov 12
Thank you again! Same to you! Have a wonderful day!
@mythociate (15963)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
27 Nov 12
Yes. The trick is to figure out how to 'be the head and not the tail' while still condoning the system in which everyone has to serve as 'the tail' sometimes. I think the secret might be to never let anyone know you've ever BEEN 'the tail'---to act as if you haven't ever had it bad. Like a lot of Hollywood-stars & -starlets ... to look at them, you would think they never had it bad---that their lives have been served to them on diamond platters, living as they do off of the huge excess of the American Empire. ("American Empire"! Did I say that? ... Oooooh, the Force is strong with this one!) ... but I KNOW that every star has serious problems---the better the acting, the deeper the problems; because they have to invest more of their psyche's in imaginary roles according to how heavy their real-life worries are. They are practically dancing on the edge of dementia on the screen--if they make one wrong move, they risk falling into a bottomless pit of despair (out of which they cannot climb until they hit the bottom, which never happens)--and we think they're doing it for 'us'
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
You are so right! I tell people all the time, if you are broke, don't let people know you are. Act as if..... In otherwords, if they know you are down, they look at you differently, treat you differently, but...if they think you are on top of the world and doing well, then you get their attention, their respect. It's a shame that we live in such a world where honestly doesn't pay.
@mythociate (15963)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
28 Nov 12
Well, honesty does pay, but ... if you have 'digestive problems,' I'd much rather give you a pill or a diet-plan to take care of it than 'turn you over and dig up the power-tools & check it out for myself.' To put it another way, 'people eating the McDonald's hamburger don't want to watch the cow-dismemberment that went into making the meat.' Or 'you go to school so you can graduate, not so you can study hard & stress-out and go into debt.' Kinda like Lord Jesus & Saint Peter taught walking on water, the trick is to focus on where you're going & not on where you are too much. That's sorta how I'm still alive today: because--rather than focus on 'how I feel now' or 'what's wrong with me'--I was focused on 'big things that are going to happen in my future.'
@chatoang (61)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
yes i felt the same too. But, if i ponder that people are sometimes indifferent and insensitive to our feelings I am relieve . I realized that no one is perfect anyway so why not disregard the feeling.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
Sometimes easier said than done.
• Philippines
29 Nov 12
hahahaha. i admit, I'm only human, there are times I do care the ill feeling. But it won't last long, prayers do the great help. Wanna try? It really helps.
@edvc77 (2143)
• Philippines
28 Nov 12
Life is such a complex matter at times. One will never know what will happen the next day or the next year to come. Sometimes we do things right and at times bad because of wrong decisions or at times just a victim of circumstances. Yes, at times it is unfair not because God is unfair but because people themselves are unfair. I think that is life at times. However, God is there to make things beautiful and fair for everyone. God Bless
@bizness (841)
• United States
28 Nov 12
Thank you for replying. Words of wisdom I know. We do not know what will happen dy to day or year to year, this is true, but people do work hard to have a secure and bright future. My question is why it seems so much harder for some that deserve it more than most.
@TMac94 (16)
• United States
27 Nov 12
Everybody somehow have their ups and downs. I have and somehow don't seem why it happens. It may be unfair but look on the bright side, was it something you needed to do? Was it going to affect your lifestyle in the later years? Be confident.
@bizness (841)
• United States
28 Nov 12
Well sometimes, yes, it was going to effect me...but I think it's more the principle behind it, which makes it very frustrating.
@rubrub (166)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
I think most of us do feel that :) I usually feel that sometimes life is unfair whenever i am facing problems. But i just say to myself that there is a purpose for that and these are all just trials in life. I trust God, and i know he will help us overcome those challenges :)
@bizness (841)
• United States
28 Nov 12
I trust God but I don't believe he sits back and waits to just 'zap' and either fix everything or mess everything up. We are all human and we make mistakes...we have to move forward and I know that, it's just not easy.
@bhelle76 (354)
• Canada
27 Nov 12
I feel the same way too. i couldn't deny that from the beginning of my life until now, there's always difficulties, circumstances that keeps on popping almost everyday. So, I said to myself, it is really unfair why it's always me? I keep telling on myself that maybe I did something bad or maybe God telling me of something to change in my life, I really don't know. I just couldn't figure it out. However, sometimes, I may say positively, that maybe in some other time I will find the happiness that I want in this life, that God loves me in other way.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
The difficulties I can handle, what it is, is that no matter how hard I try, how hard I work, how much I help others, things continually go wrong, fall down around my head.
@Muelitz (1592)
• Canada
27 Nov 12
I believe all of us in one time or another felt that life is not fair. We sometimes feel that we deserved a better life because we are living a life honestly. There are some people whom we know does not play fair and take advantage of others and they have good lives. It is only now that I have a relationship with the Lord that I forget about the shortcomings in my life. I think of these as trials in life that I should surpass to make me stronger.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I agree to a point. And yes, these things do make some of us stronger. But still...
27 Nov 12
Perfect saying friend, i belive in hardwork..:-)
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
As do I...I work extremely hard. Don't think that's the answer.
@jaiho2009 (39001)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Life is never unfair- it is how people sees it. But how come life is unfair if we do not know how to appreciate everything that we have? Most people complain a lot of things without looking around them- there are less fortunate people who strive hard and never complain instead, they are thankful that are given another day to live. While there are people who complain of little things and never knows to say thanks for having a better life than the others.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I am thankful for my life and it's not that I'm complaining, it's that I see what I see. And I'm not necessarily talking about myself either. I see it happening all the time. People working and getting nowhere while others are lazy and do nothing but have alot.
• India
27 Nov 12
I don't think it's unfair. Life is never unfair to anyone. It's all upon you how you take it, negatively or positively. You know life is never perfect, we have to make it perfect. It's always unfair when you don't want to face it. Always face your problems & never run away from then, that's life & there's lots of struggle always. Be strong always. God bless.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
Thank you! I do think positively for the most part, and I understand and know all too well that life isn't perfect and I don't expect that...at all. I just get frustrated trying to 'do the right thing', and 'being a good person' when I look around and see lowlifes that could care less, yet they get farther than I do....sigh.
@elsino91 (443)
• Poland
27 Nov 12
I feel like that a lot too. I don't mean whenever things don't go my way but I'm a very hard working person, when I set eyes on something I do everything I have to to get it but it seems like I just don't get a lot of the things I want in life and sometimes I even swear that I atract bad things. I often find myself telling myself that life just hates me, as if some greater power doesn't want me to succeed in life or get the things that mean most to me. But in the end I don't believe in fate, we create our own luck and whether things go our way or not is mostly down to us and outside, physical forces.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I feel the same way many times. I agree with you, it's not the things that don't go my way or anything like that, I'm not a 'brat' and I don't believe things should be handed to me...what I do believe is this: hard work, determination, perseverance, fortitude, all of these things are good qualities, so why can't you get anywhere? Sometimes I feel like being like those people that don't care, don't work, don't strive for things...because I see them doing well and I just don't get it!
• United States
27 Nov 12
We all get like that, Biz. Life does seem unfair when other people are receiving the perks of life when the rest of us are left out in the cold. It hurts when you notice some people in your families are living the life that you want to live and you question how did they do it? Instead of dwelling on the situation (which is easier than doing it) I work harder and strive harder every day just because if they can do it, what's my reason not to? Like my mother says, 'Rome wasn't built in a day.'
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I understand, but it's the fact that no matter what, some try and try, work hard, and still they get, what? Working even harder...
@wolfie34 (26792)
• United Kingdom
27 Nov 12
It is when you fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others! Then we start realizing what we haven't got or what life has failed to bring us. I have done this myself, my ex girlfriend's sister, has everything, she has a loving attentive, attractive boyfriend, she has no money concerns, she has a nice house, brilliantly paid job and a nice car, life has been brilliant to her, she wants for nothing. Then I look at my life, I was abused twice, been in two mentally abusive relationships, I was diagnozed with clinical depression, I have anxiety issues, I am unemployed and unable to get a job, I live with my parents because I couldn't afford to keep my place running, it's not easy to stay upbeat, positive and enjoy life when you see others that have everything and life to them is wonderful.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I agree! It is so hard to try to stay positive, focused. Sometimes it's like 'what's the use?'.
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Hmm. They said life is fair but for now i think it is not. If i have to weigh my ups and down, down would be heavier. I don't know i just feel like everyday is just the same and it's getting dull. I tried to do some fun but there's still this tiny sadness jailed inside.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I suppose you need to do some 'soul searching' to see if there's something you truly want out of life. Then go for it!
• India
27 Nov 12
Hi friend, Life is a beautiful gift from god, we must live it fully. Problems and worries are common to every one, so we don't hate our life for silly problems. Everyone is facing a lot of struggles and challenges in their life. No one is free from struggles and worries. We have the ability to win over our problems. If we started to worry a lot for our problems we don't have the ability to find out the solution. Keep your problems aside and try your maximum to find out the solution. All the problems have their own solution. Everything is having its own end, so don't worry a lot for your problems and end your life due to it. We must be bold enough to face our problems. Don't be a coward and try to escape from your issues, be confident and like your problems, it will help you to find solution to solve it. Most of the times problems will teach a great lesson to us and solving the problem is a great experience to every one. God always give problem to the person who have the ability to bear and solve it. Also he give the solution to our problem by any means, so don't worry for problem and hate life for it. Ending our life for a problem is not a good thing. We don't have the rights to end our life. God is the person who created us and he knows to end our life, so give that responsibility to his hands. We must learn to love our life and enjoy each and every moment of our life. Really our life is a precious gift, and we must live it in a good manner to the fullest. If we started to love our life, surely our problem don't give a lot of worries to us, we will find a solution for it easily. So start to love your life and enjoy it a lot.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I am a firm believer in my faith and God. I know I can 'handle' pretty much anything that comes my way. And for the record, I am not a coward, I face and deal with any and all issues in my life. But, again, I don't understand how some people just have things 'dropped' in their life, basically just handed to them, and they don't work for it, or care for people...then others work constantly, are good people and yet they continually struggle. No, it's not fair,at all.....I have seen good people live their lives and struggle their entire life to end up losing everything...fair, I think not...just, I think not...life? ...yes it is.
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
I don't think life is unfair. I don't think I have ever thought of such a thing. I mean ... my life so far is pretty awesome. I am very thankful for it. I guess I am one of the lucky people. Also, whenever I have problems ... as much as possible, I don't want to blme other people. It's all part of life. It's up to us how we run it. That's my opinion or perspective.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
An it's a great opinion. As I've stated in numerous responses, I just feel that sometimes when I watch other people, good people, work hard, do the 'right' thing, are good to people, generous, loving, giving people, and then I watch these same people struggle on a daily basis and have very little,it makes me wonder.
• China
27 Nov 12
what's fair? what's unfair? when you compare with the disabled people, your health makes you lucky. when you think of the orphan, the love of you parents makes you warm. There is always something better you have than others! so don't compare with else. Be yourself. seize the hour, seize the day!
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
OUTSTANDING!! Thank you for your post! Great comparisons and great advice!
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Thanks for sharing this discussion. Well for me, I do sometimes think that life's unfair. But after weighing the things that happened in my life, i realized that there are more positives compared to negatives. So, i don't think much now about life being unfair. Just live your life normally, and don't worry about anything that you do especially when you didn't do anything bad to anyone/anything.
@bizness (841)
• United States
27 Nov 12
I do. The question is more for who else out there feels this way. I work hard and always try to do the right thing, but I am only human, and yes there are many times I wonder 'why?'.