A surgery at his age?
November 27, 2012 1:09pm CST
My father is 80 years old has a bad heart and other health issues. He also has a hernia sticking out of his belly but he has no pain or problems with it,it just don't looks good. He is doing very well now but he thinks he has more chances by woman when this hernia would not stick out that far So he consulted a specialist and he said that he is not sure if he can get him out in one peace in his health condition. That was enough for me I just lost my mother! I said no way grabbed him and went. He was pretty upset with me! Now I found out that he has a new app. Cause of this surgery So I called my sister and ask her what to do. She gave me to think. When I am 80 years old I wonne still decide what I do or not And he is very clear in his head Now I am guessing that I am selfish and I am cause its me who don't wonne loose him And I don't wont him see me ruling over his life. So I decided after a long talk with him that I won't stand in his way when he wants to do that. How would you react ?
• Pune, India
28 Nov 12
Hi, surgery at the age of 80s is risky but if your father is not listening anyone's advice then your decision not to stand in his way is right. There is no other option for you. old people and children are very difficult to handle. Old people think that they are neglected because they are of no use.
28 Nov 12
Maybe the only way is to follow your father'decision.Just as you said that your father has a clear mind and he know what he is doing.Maybe he thinks that it is a second chance for his life and he wants to live better than now.You should talk with him and discuss with your sister.You can ask your father that if he has considered the bad result of the surgery and if it happened, does he have any regret.Then,just let him make the last decision(because don't make the surgery may be also a regret in his rest life).
• United States
27 Nov 12
My Mom was almost 80 and she had a problem that the dr's said that at this stage it wasn't safe to do surgery. She passed away 2 years later of an unrelated illness. I'm only 65 and if my dr. suggested surgery for anything I would say no. I'm of the belief and people will disagree but once they cut you open for any kind of surgery you end up having other problems. I know this from the experiences of family and friends.
9 Mar 13
I would have done the same if I were you. Because nothing is more important than health and life. The age and health condition of your father is already putting a big red sign saying no to the surgery. Any person with sane mind would have think a surgery with his condition is a really bad idea. I hope nothing happened to him after the surgery though as the risk is just too high. We should learn to be contended with what we had when we were young.