Losing contact with an old best friend and worried

Indonesia
December 2, 2012 3:51am CST
So 2 days ago is the last I ever in contact with my best friend in high school. I know that she's in a great financial problem. I lend my money to her several times and she has not returned it yet but since I feel sorry for her, I never asked that money back, beside she already too generous to me at high school. Two days ago, she has sent me a short message saying that she is going to sell her handphone since she didn't have money anymore and that she has to move from her rented house since she can't afford to pay anymore. So after that I replied to ask how is she and where is she going to stay, but no answer and it shown not delivered. I tried to contact her in facebook since two days ago, but not worked, never got the reply back, I don't really know precisely where she lives now, since we only contacted each other from phone or facebook. Just a background of though, she has no parents anymore since high school. However her parents are pretty rich and left her much money. But she too generous to all her friends, in high school I always got so many presents from her in my birthday like bag, expensive accessory, shoes, and often treated me for lunch, and she did it to all her friends too, she also pretty improvident with her money and bought so many things that she wants like expensive clothes or food. However it seems like nowadays her wealth pretty much decreased, which is not surprising because of her lifestyle and she isn't working, I know recently that she has sold many of her possession like television, dvd player, her mother's gold accessories and much more to cover her financial and now the last her handphone. She didn't graduated from college because lack of will power too, I think (she was not really dilligent student). What will you do if you're in my position, will you worry and how to contact her?
7 responses
@Arieles (2474)
• United States
2 Dec 12
You haven't seen your friend in two days? Ahh, I wouldn't be worried, it's only two days. There are times when I haven't seen my friend in months. I'm sure she will get in contact with you. As for money with friends and family, never lend it if you expect it back. It's a much better friend to give it as a gift and expect nothing in return, and only give it if you can afford to give it. This will always keep the line of communication open and you won't have to worry if your friend really is trying to "ditch" you. I hope you hear from her soon.
• Indonesia
2 Dec 12
I'm not expecting my money back though, I'm worried because she didn't have any family left and if she was going to move, where will she go? Anyway, I won't be worried if it's a friend who is in a good condition if I wasn't hear from them just for 2 days, but her condition is not that good, just hope she didn't commit anything bad or act rashly though....
@DaveGee1 (11)
• United States
2 Dec 12
That's a really rough situation. It sounds like you had a good bond with her and a good relationship, but she made a series of bad decisions with her money and now she doesn't have any to support herself. So she had to sell her phone and now you're totally in the dark and you seem very worried about your friend. I would be very concerned too, but getting a hold of her may be difficult. since you were only able to use Facebook and phone calls. I would do what the poster above said. See if you can't find other mutual friends who may have contacted her. Finally, the only thing left that I can see, is that you remain patient. She may not be able to get to a computer right away, but chances are, she will eventually check her messages and my try to reach out to you again to see if she can get some support. I know it may be difficult not knowing where she is and how she is doing. It's hard not to know how a good friend is doing, but you gotta have faith. I hope everything works out for you and your friend.
• Indonesia
2 Dec 12
Thank you, I just hope she didn't act rashly or involved in something worse because of this condition, that's what make me worried...
@kokomo (1868)
• Philippines
2 Dec 12
Do you have common friends?Do you know her place? You must contact your common friends and ask if they are communicating with her. I feel so sorry with your friend. She was very extravagant and she learned her lesson. Wealth will just fade away in a snap of a finger if we are very careless.
• Indonesia
2 Dec 12
Yes, I have contacted our friends in high school but no one knows, they know she is in financial problem though, but they just realized she has sold her handphone after I told them and they tried to contact her but not delivered too, a friend tried to ask about her to landlord of her rented house but he also don't know where she was going. This is also the reason I'm worried, I hope she didn't act rashly and got into bigger problem...
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
3 Dec 12
I understand the reason why you feel that way. I hope she's in good condition. just my opinion here- but you should have visited her before. I mean, ever talk with her about her problem and assured her that you are always there to lend a hand (like you always do) I guess she really need someone right now- to guide her for a better life to walk on through. Just keep on searching- contact your common friends maybe they know or had any idea where did she ever go.
@Micmac (8496)
2 Dec 12
hi randommarts09 I'm sorry you lost your friend but perhaps she is gone only temporary and will contact you soon. I understand you are worried for her and how she is doing because you are close friends since high school days. Be patient, her moving on may not be as bad as you think. It's is terrible to miss a friend. I have a few friends from shcool days that I've grown attached to for many years we were the best of pals, and then suddently they disappear, relocated and I never heard back from them. I still wonder where they are and what they are doing in their life but there is no sign of them anywhere. I hope you find your friend and she will communicate with you again. In the meantime, keep on asking her friends if they have any clue as to where she is and if they have heard from her at all. Wish you all the best dear!
@sriroshan (2586)
• India
2 Dec 12
Just 2 days pass don't worry your friend must be busy in some work. It's happen as we all have got our own work and under such situation we give more important to our work then to our friend. Don't worry I am sure once his work get completed he will called you or will meet you personally.
@lutfies (54)
• Indonesia
2 Dec 12
maybe I'II help him, help change her lifestyle and help give him a job or find a job, because if he does not work then he will not get the money.