Could you date someone who did not want to go to church?

United States
December 10, 2012 12:06am CST
I really want to get back to going to church. I have asked a few times for him to go with me. he kept saying when he gets ready. I a hoping that I don't go to church and something makes me change my mind about my current life. church has a way of changing people. I think in the long run it would bother me.
3 people like this
19 responses
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
10 Dec 12
Yes I definately could date someone who did not attenc church.. I look at it this way, I have to live my life as I know to be he right way and I have to please God almighty, no one else and I certainly can't make anyone go to church...As long as I served my God I can only save me.... Its not the church that changes people its the faith that you learn and adopt while in church..God moves through many ways and whatever it takes to get to us he will be there in spirits... weather its in your house or church...
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Dec 12
I hope he comes soon and moves me. I feel like I need something fast.
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
10 Dec 12
Havw you ever heard this saying.." he may not come when you want him but he is right on time"...just keep the faith...
• United States
10 Dec 12
I think It's different for everyone really even more so if there are different religion factoring Into the picture.
1 person likes this
@asliah (11149)
• Philippines
26 Jan 13
hi, for me there is no problem with me if i will date someone who don't go to the church,and i will respect his reason,and aside from that its just a date and bearing when he don't go in church,and if we will together in one house then it can be teach him to go gradually in church.
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
17 Dec 12
I don't judge people according to their faith so it will not be one of my requirements if I will be dating with somebody. A lot of great people are not church goer but they live a very descent, honest and ideal lifestyle.
@mr_pearl (5037)
• India
11 Dec 12
Hi... Does it really matter if he goes to church or not? I think it should be enough that both of you love and respect each other... The love should not cause any changes in your relation, even if one of you does not goto church... And the respect for each other should allow each other to have your oqn personal space... That way, either one or both of you can goto church or do whatever you guys want to do.. :-)
@al1979ex (125)
• Philippines
11 Dec 12
did you asked him already what are his reasons not going to the church with you? consider his reasons. also, you can to church on your own and trust all things would be for the better.
@celticeagle (118254)
• Boise, Idaho
11 Dec 12
Church has alot of pros and cons. People going to church can really look down their perfect noses on newbies. I don't care for socializing much. Just my little corner of friends. I never cared much for church because it has been my experience that they are alot of hypocrits. And I don't agree with alot of the teachings in most established churches. As far as having a mate who went with me I wouldn't care. Church and religion has never been a problem in any of my relationships.
• United States
11 Dec 12
That's the way it was with hubby and I. Over this past year, I have been more diligent about going to church. Every day, I would pray to God to Bless my hubby with a peaceful heart and contented mind. Now, he's starting to come to chruch more often. I don't force him, I just let him know I'm going and I don't allow him to stop me from going. Just pray every day. God will handle it. :)
@IAmNena (178)
• Philippines
11 Dec 12
I think you can still change his/her perspective.Since you 2 are dating why don't talk to him/her that why do you want to go to church.If he/ she still doesn't understand you then I guess it's time for you to think about it,give it a 2nd though.Also you can't judge a person just because he/ she didn't want to go to church,I suggest that you should know more about this person.Who knows, maybe you two could be that close that you'll convince him/her to go to church and change him, Oh you know what they say, love can change anything.
• United States
10 Dec 12
The bible says not to be unequally yoked. It's not church that changes people. Church is just a building. But when you become saved, Christ becomes your Husband. You have a relationship with Christ. This truly changes a person to want to do the right thing. I have married men who weren't saved, they didn't go to church because they felt no connection with Christ, and we never worked out. I stayed married almost 10 years, but it just didn't work. He continued with his drinking, getting drunk and running around with women behind my back. Church was the last thing he had on his mind. I will only consider dating a chrisymtian man, and if he drinks or smokes he won't even get the first date. I don't want that in my life.
@Tina30219 (34194)
• Onaway, Michigan
10 Dec 12
I don't think I could date someone that does not like going to church because I like going to church.You are right church has a way of changing people I sure hope my husband starts going back and it changes him back to the good man I know he is.
@sid556 (31005)
• United States
10 Dec 12
It's a personal choice. I would not have a problem dating someone who did not want to go. If I felt the church helped me then I would just go on my own.
@kokomo (1868)
• Philippines
10 Dec 12
Why is it that, he doesn't want to go to church? I remember the first day that my boyfriend asked me outt for a date and he ask me if I want us to meet in church. Of course, I accepted it. The first thing that came in my mind was this guy is so much God fearing. I asked him why he chose church in spite a lot of beautiful spots and romantic place and he said it is more solemn than the other usual places. We ended up happy dating.
@chiyosan (29383)
• Philippines
10 Dec 12
I do not think i would be able to go out with someone who does not believe in anything other than himself, or the people or the things he sees in himself or around him. I think someone who does not believe in God and who does not have faith would really clash with me, because i have quite a lot of ideas and faith in God so I would really be all over him asking him about the things and his ideas and i might as well even try to convince him to get to know the God we all know.
@WakeUpKitty (8707)
• Netherlands
10 Dec 12
I always did, my friends/family all have different kind of believes and it was never a problem. I think if it comes to that nobody cares much in my country about religion. It's a personal thing and it should stay that way. Just like political ideas (ever read: Don Camillo??) If you are not able to be friends or love someone with an other opinion or other believe it's clear to me you are not a christian at all plus you have no faith. Since if you believe god made all people, he will take care of them as well. There is no need for you to interfere, stabb them in the back or kill them. And if you do so you also do not understand what freedom means.
@Iriene88 (5352)
• Malaysia
10 Dec 12
Perhaps you can invite him to church occasionally like on Easter Day and Christmas Day where he do not find it too 'heavy' on him. Give him time and pray about it. I believe God have its timing. For an example, my mum has been asking my eldest sister to go to church but she always say 'No'. Then one day, a friend of mine who do not know her but when I relate to her that my eldest sister have some problems, my friend called her and there she is in the church willingly at her will. She is a church goer ever since ... So, pray and submit to God.
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
10 Dec 12
Change is inevitable. But if you will change for the better, then it will open doors to good relations with a lot more people.
10 Dec 12
I think it depends on what the reason is. Have an honest chat with him about it. Did he have a bad experience at church once but has no issue with God? Or does he simply not believe in God? I think it is fine for friends to have different beliefs but for a couple there has to be some more things in common. How can he support you in a choice that he does not even believe in himself? Also, I think it would conflict with your own faith. For example, I know a Christian man should seek out a "proverbs 31" woman and it is encouraged in the bible. How can you try to follow the bible as a guide to life and then know that the person you are dating can never be that person since they are not of the same faith?
@trisha27 (3505)
• United States
10 Dec 12
I think that maybe you should give him time. When my husband and I were dating, he at first didn't want to go. But I gave him time and eventually he wanted to go with me to church and enjoyed it. Now that we are back into going to church he's already planning that we go to church every Sunday and Wednesday. I say don't force him to go if he's not ready to go. But since you want to go, then you should go and see how you like it. Then you can go home and tell him all about it. It may inspire for him to go to, just cause he see you going. But maybe when I was younger I wouldn't have dated someone if they didn't go to church. But after meeting my husband I just gave him time and I just didn't go. I guess maybe that is something I shouldn't have done, I wish I would have still gone, but I think I just didn't want to go alone. But I'm just going to say give it time, if he sees you going maybe he'll want to go eventually. Yeah church can change you but sometimes its for the best.