Those dreadful 4 days!

@allknowing (66487)
India
December 11, 2012 9:25pm CST
I had 4 siblings older to me and I never knew when it happened to them as here in India it is never discussed openly. The hush hush around me made me wonder what was going on. "She has not yet" were the oft repeated words around and I did not know what the elders in the house were talking about. Until one fine day I was in tears and disclosed to my mother what had happened to me. "You are a big girl now" is what she said to me. I was miserable. I never wanted to grow. And thereafter those 4 days in the month were least looked forward to by me. It is only now one even sees advertisements on tv openly telling young girls how to manage those 4 dreadful days. Were you upset too or were you looking forward to it happily wanting to grow!!
4 people like this
8 responses
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
12 Dec 12
I was already aware of that thing to happen to me. But when it happened, I wasn't that sure if it was what I thought it was. I was not scared when I first found out. I just casually told my mom about it. I just hate that I had to deal with it on a monthly basis coz I would often faint because of too much pain. I would even have dark nail beds and would be too pale to handle the pain. I am glad that it isn't that painful anymore, although I still do experience it sometimes.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (66487)
• India
12 Dec 12
It becomes easier to handle if one knows the ins and outs of what goes on in one's body. But here the situation those days was quite different. Today's youngsters have enough exposure what with the Internet and the tv! I am happy for you that you no longer suffer from PMS.
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@allknowing (66487)
• India
12 Dec 12
Ever youngster has a different experience but that is what nature has blessed us with. We have to bear it all I guess!
1 person likes this
@viju0410 (2286)
• India
12 Dec 12
Hi, I was not upset and even today when i'm growing (getting aged) i just welcome all the natural changes and phases of our life. My mother discussed everything during those age as she had to stay away for a while due to my (late) dad's treatment and she never wanted me to get worried at the time of 'becoming a big girl'. Similarly since i am a working mother, i too have given my daughter all the info / knowledge though today the school teachers also give lecture on the hygenic handling during those days.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (66487)
• India
12 Dec 12
I was the eighth in the family pretty pampered. I just did not want to grow up Good for you that you accepted it well. I was miserable when I had to face it each month!
1 person likes this
@jaiho2009 (39019)
• Philippines
12 Dec 12
No, I was not upset. Maybe because here in my country this stage is open discuss with friends and family members - regardless of gender. Monthly period is not a big deal here to discuss and it's the most exciting stage of a girl's life. That means she's about to face a new phase of growing up
1 person likes this
@allknowing (66487)
• India
12 Dec 12
Good for you jaioho. When it did happen we only talked about it with our peers and that too when no one else was listening!
1 person likes this
• Pamplona, Spain
14 Apr 13
Hello allknowing, Me I was about 12 just turned when I became "a big Girl". Did I look forward to it? No not really but I knew that it had to happen so I took it like everyone else. Had some pretty rough days too at the start it would settle down and then go haywire again lasting for 7 days sometimes. One Woman I know here told her daughter who has just become a big girl that it can last up to 52 years old and she shrieked you have to be joking lol. I wanted to grow but without that. There was quite a lot of tabu yes and even now its not something you talk that freely about in the Family.xxx
@allknowing (66487)
• India
15 Apr 13
It is only those boundaries that separate us making us belong to different nationalities but when it comes to biology we are no different from each other!
1 person likes this
• Pamplona, Spain
15 Apr 13
Hello allknowing, So true we are only separated by Seas and rivers and mountains and other silly things we are all the same. Yet thank goodness we are all the same and yet so different what makes the world go round I suppose. I did have to laugh about her daughter though it was like she had been given a life sentence. Where I came from you just did not talk about those kind of things although you already knew about them beforehand.xxx
@allknowing (66487)
• India
15 Apr 13
My mother just told me that I had become a big girl and that thing about telling the daughter that it will last 52 years was not called for. It was the same here during my days. None of us knew till it happened. I too am happy that we are different in other ways. That makes the world go round - if I am to use your own words!
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27565)
• United States
13 Dec 12
I was quite surprised because it happened a bit early for me. I am not sure if my grandmother had not expected it yet but I think she was uncomfortable with the subject. I think that natural occurrences have been far too censored among the women in the house for a very long time. I can understand not involving the males..but the women..I think could stand to be a bit more candid. We are one in our experiences and who better to learn from? I was excited once I learned there was nothing wrong but at the same time, there is a lot to live up to with those changes.
@allknowing (66487)
• India
13 Dec 12
Specially the staining part! Ugh!! I would ask my friend to follow me - getting up after sitting for long hours, accidents were not ruled out!
@JenInTN (27565)
• United States
14 Dec 12
I think that the statement "be prepared for the worst and hope for the best" was created because of that exact situation.
@allknowing (66487)
• India
14 Dec 12
All sayings have a beginning somewhere and probably this saying that you have quoted have their origins when one poor little teenage kid must have shown concern about her condition!
@viji_v2 (727)
• India
17 Dec 12
Hi allknowing, this is our human mind. When we are kids we want to become the older one and have to see and enjoy what they do and took their responsibilities. But when we are grown up, we want to go back to our younger age after learning that being grown up is not easy. Too much of responsibilities than fun and enjoyment. Today's generation is so clear to find the difference in it due to media.
@allknowing (66487)
• India
18 Dec 12
Today's generation grows up before their time with exposure that is available to them - thanks to the Internet. I do not think it is a good thing as we want children around us lisping away!
1 person likes this
@viji_v2 (727)
• India
18 Dec 12
Only now the parents have to monitor and to teach them how to detect good from bad.
@NailTech (6890)
• United States
15 Dec 12
I was an early bloomer at about 11 1/2 and thankfully I was at home when I discovered "something" was different if you know what I mean and thankfully my mom actually spoke to me not too long before that and had also ordered some pamplets and "samples" of what to use. She was quite prepared. We had to have permission to be able to watch some info about it through our school health program. I can't remember what she told me, but you are a big girl wasn't one of them. I was excited and happy about it at first for some strange reason then later on I hated having it as it was so heavy, uncomfortable, giving me problems, and sometimes too soon in coming back. I didn't go to the DR for quite some time after experiencing those irregular times, it turns out I had a orange sized cyst in me and for how long I don't know. How long can these things keep growing and shrinking, etc. It is a mystery. I remember one time when I was maybe 6 and seeing a TV commercial for one of things we use for it and wondering what they were but never asking anyone.
@allknowing (66487)
• India
15 Dec 12
No matter which part of the globe we come from it is the same story with some variation here and there. In your case sadly you have to deal with a problem. I hope all is well now.
@pergammano (7755)
• Canada
12 Dec 12
Taboo! Not spoken of! Whispered about! Clueless! Overheard utterings; "it's about her time, we should talk to her!" Well, my time arrived under the worst circumstances in the world! Just myself, and my adult Uncle...horseback (seperate horses) many, many miles from home doing the Fall Round-up of livestock! NEVER ever forget the day..October 31, Hallowe'en Day when I was 13 years old! Humungous pain..undisquisable amount of fluid, unbeareable embarassment and confusion (not really sure if I was dying!) Even today, remembering that day..NOT GOOD! And NOT prepared! Too embarassed, missed Hallowe'en party! Bad, bad memories!
@allknowing (66487)
• India
12 Dec 12
Thirteen is too young although nowadays I am told it can happen when one is just around 10 - blame it on food I guess. In my case, it was November 15 a Thursday - sixteen and a half years that's why that "she has not yet" whisper. College had a holiday the weekly holiday that is. Just as well. Thank heavens for little mercies. From then on all those 4 or sometimes less or sometimes more days month in and month out were just shunned but could not be avoided as you very well know Poor Uncle. I wonder how he took control of the situation!