Raising pre-teen kids is not as easy as I thought it would be.

Philippines
December 13, 2012 7:50am CST
Raising pre-teen kids is just as hard as taking care of new-born babies. When my kids were still babies, I wished hard that they would grow up fast so I could rest from those sleepless nights of feeding, changing diapers, pacifying their cries, etc. Now then, I thought it would already be easier than before but I was wrong. Managing them is not as easy as I thought it would be; the stubbornness that goes with their growing up, their performance in school that I always have to monitor, the influence by friends that sometimes impede their positive growth, are just some of the pains that I have been dealing with. But as a mother, I should be patient and understanding as they too, for sure, share the same growing-up pains. Nevertheless, I know that someday soon they'll be mature enough to outgrow all these. As long as it's for their betterment, I'm willing to endure all pains. That is how I ought to be as a mother...
2 people like this
9 responses
• India
6 Feb 13
Thanks for this discussion, i agree raising preteen kids is difficult than raising babies, there is every chance for the preteen kids to go in wrong track.
• United States
24 Dec 12
I didn't think it would be this hard either. I agree one waits for so long for them to have independence and do some things on their own. But you are right the battles over homework have begun and monitoring they do their school work. I can't believe the begging and pleading to get her to help around the house or to get their day going. I thought teenagers did this junk? Even better why does it seem like everyone elses kids are behaved and mine are not?
@junmae (1562)
• Philippines
14 Dec 12
That's why being a mother is the most challenging job. I also have daughter and I know that sooner or later she will grow up and will be added in my headache. But as a mother, i should be prepared because no matter what happened, i cant me mad at her should she will cause trouble.
@WakeUpKitty (8717)
• Netherlands
14 Dec 12
Each child has it's own worries is an expression in my country. That is not only if it comes to the parents but also to the children. My granny always said the childhood is the best time of your life (as a kid) no worries, no responsibilities. I don't from what planet she came from but this was not true if it comes to me (and she could have known that). I think that if you paint a picture about how your kids will be (for example before you get pregnan or get them) you will disappointed in most cases. You can not pick out the kind of kid you like. You have no influence on the society and how they will respond on your kid or visa versa. You can make a big fight out of the fact your kid is stubborn but this is normal at a certain age. I think you should better be happy your child shows character and self esteem. It is willing to fight for what it wants. Since these are all skills he/she will need in the future. If you take that away from it, punish it for his behavour you will make an underdog out of it. In this life it's survival of the fittest. If you are not willing or able to fight for your goals, your happiness you will always be bullied and end up as a big nobody. BTW a mother should not endure all pains. This is nonsense and if you behave like that, like a victim, sacrificing yourself, you give a very bad example to your child how to treat girls/women now and in the future.
@jenny1015 (13398)
• Philippines
14 Dec 12
You can say that again! And I got 3 teens and an 8 year old - all boys! I could be draining all my blood with all the things that they do! But that is part of our resume in life!
@sishy7 (17483)
• Australia
14 Dec 12
No, not easy at all... But, all the hard work are so rewarding at the same time... I have four teenage sons now. Sometimes I have no idea myself how we went through all those times raising them. As you said, just continue being patient and understanding; I trust everything will be just working out for the best at the end.
• Jacksonville, Florida
13 Dec 12
I agree with choybel, you are a great mother! =) For me, I felt like the baby stage was the easier part, I knew then that it would only get harder as time goes on... My children are not pre-teens yet but my oldest will be soon! Lol. I am not looking forward to that time but I know I will deal with it the best I can like everything else. The hardest thing for me right now is how fast time goes by when you have children. I cannot believe how quickly my kids are growing up! =( I feel like it was just yesterday that I had them...
@choybel (5059)
• Philippines
13 Dec 12
The only thing I am sure of from all that you have stated is, that you are one good parent. Good luck and more power!
@ctryhnny (3463)
• United States
13 Dec 12
Take it from me I have 3 adult kids and it doesn't get better as they get older. The sleepless nights are worth it because at least you know where they are and what they are doing. Teens want and need so much more than babies. I wish my kids were still babies!