Is it alright to add on or shorten the name you have given?

@kiran8 (15289)
Mangalore, India
December 23, 2012 11:01pm CST
I see this happening many times, some members not just here but even on other sites have long names and members while addressing them tend to shorten it for convenience sake...I too do it at times like there is a member on one of the sites called cheesecakesandwine and I call this member cheese and most others do so...But sometimes people add on their own adjectives like Ji,Bhai,Mr and Mrs which actually is slotting you to a category of their choice ,I find it quite annoying- am I justified in doing so...
1 person likes this
11 responses
@sjvg1976 (14714)
• Delhi, India
24 Dec 12
Hi Kiran, I used to add "Ji" to some people who became my friend but they like you got annoyed when I started it they made me understand that its not good then I realised it that its not good and i stopped doing so after that and now have not been using it with any of my online friend.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
Hi sanjeev, when members get to know each other well and are on good terms such a feeling does not come, but without being so, to presume and slot people can be annoying - calling people Mr Mrs,Ji or aunty does annoy people.As you rightly said it is better to call them with their online name instead of adding on anything- all the best and enjoy your vacation
@suni51 (1849)
24 Dec 12
I agree that no one should start relations without knowing some one properly but adding words to show respect is different, isn't it? However I don't mind if any one wants me to call me by fist name or my pet name.
@sjvg1976 (14714)
• Delhi, India
24 Dec 12
I am sorry but to add ji,Mrs or Mr is just like giving respect to someone but not to start a relationship with the someone. I did it for sake of respect but may be I was wrong we should not do it at least on online.
@dpk262006 (54849)
• Delhi, India
28 Dec 12
Hi Kiran! I try to address a mylotter by her or his log in Name and if I know his/her real name I sometimes use the real name (with the permission of the lotter). I do not mind dear friends on mylot either using my screen name/real name/ shortened name or any name given by them. I also do not like people adding 'ji', Bhai, Sis, Beta and Mr. etc. before the name. Many Mylotters could have relations/friendhsip with others mylotters which should be kept beyond the perview of discussions. Highlighting those relations on board during discussions is not understood by me.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
28 Dec 12
Hi deepak, how have you been ? I agree with your views, in fact you have hit the nail on the head, when people use our given name in different short forms or whatever it hardly matters, no issues there ! It is the bhai,ji,ister,aunty that really puts me off...In some forums it goes to such limits that people openly want to flaunt their closeness to certain members thinking that it somehow gives them an added edge ... all the best and enjoy your day Deepak
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
28 Dec 12
Rathr behen,sister etc....
@dpk262006 (54849)
• Delhi, India
28 Dec 12
I am doing fine. (have been keeping busy lately). Yes, you are right some online users go beyond limits to show their closeness for others, which is beyond comprehension. (God knows if they get an added advantage for showing closeness)
@Asylum (47341)
• Manchester, England
24 Dec 12
I always use the full username that the member has chosen, but I do not really see any problem with people choosing to shorten it in some way. This happens all the way through life, so surely people are accustomed to it by now. Quite often do we encounter someone who does not use their full name and use a shortened version, such as Reg instead of Reginald or Sam instead of Samantha. Of course it may depend on whether the member is content with the abbreviation and also on the choice of shortened version used.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
Hi Asylum, shortening a name is fine with many people but some do find it annoying - I have known a couple of people here who were not happy when some members began calling them with shortened versions.I call only those who are ok with it and are already being addressed so by others.What I find a little annoying is when people add Ji,Mr,Mrs ,Aunty etc to your name even without knowing anything about you...with people who e are familiar with, it is different ! Thanks a lot for your response and happy mylotting Merry Xmas !
@Asylum (47341)
• Manchester, England
29 Dec 12
I can understand this, especially if someone has chosen a username that they really like. The same can happen offline with some people having preferences of their own. My brother was christened James, but always uses Jim as his name. My next door neighbour was also christened James and uses James at all times. Naturally I use the name that they have chosen to use when addressing them.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
9 Jan 13
Hi Asylum, I agree that we do put some thought into it before choosing a user name and when it gets distorted it does make people irritated.I have a friend on another forum with the user name angel of mercy and she hates it when some members insist on calling her aunty angie...
• India
24 Dec 12
I always address you as Kiranji or Ushaji; sorry to know you find that annoying Ji is a mark of respect like Sir or Madam Some times i find very long names i shorten it, my real name is Bhubaneshwar, nick name is Bhuwan, my friends abroad prefer the later because it is short. MERRY XMAS
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
Hi Professor, I would prefer to be called by my name...hope you don't mind,because in my opinion that is the name I have selected for my online activities and many a times we dont even know any personal details about other members so I never address them with any other name other that what they have given..makes it easier all round - all the best and hope you too have a nice christmas break
1 person likes this
• India
25 Dec 12
Ok kiran
• India
28 Dec 12
I am ok with adding ji,bhai or mr.If it not insulting, then we can be ok with it.But then thats my view.I usually say my full name when i address people and that has been a habit since long.My full name is just two names.So its more easy for people and most of the times they are comfortable.In western countries, they did have some tough time stating my last name, but were fine with my first and was easier with that.I would use only first name or my nickname to people i am comfortable.At times, i do use bhai to be friendly or diplomatic with unknown people.It does work most of the time and no one has any issues with that.For people with long names, i usually use their first name unless they instruct me otherwise.There has been few instances where people would ask to address them with their short names.Sometimes, its weird but then its their choice of things.But its fun atleast for some to have a few different names used to address.It shows warmth and friendliness.Thanks!
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
28 Dec 12
Hi asoka, thanks a lot for sharing your details, shortening an already given name doesn't really matter.But many people are not happy with their names being distorted and being added on...there is no need to do that since there is already a name selected by the member and one should respect that and address them by that name - all the best and happy mylotting
@ZoeJoy (1395)
• United States
26 Dec 12
I like short and snappy names. Just cuz. I don't see the need to use real names. We aren't really going to meet each other in person. That way, we can say things a little more freely here, than if we really were meeting each other in person. My name is a long name so why not shorten it or come up with something a little original, short and snappy.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
28 Dec 12
Hi Zoe, thanks a lot for your response I get your point, short and snappy names are easier to deal with and are far more practical.I have no issues at all with that , in fact I too tend to shorten some long names so that it becomes easier for me to type it out while responding, but what I normally dont like is adding on prefixes like Mr,Mrs,Ji,aunty,sister etc...
@suni51 (1849)
24 Dec 12
Never knew that you did not like me calling you Kiranji- I thought this was our culture that prompted me to do that but from now on I am not going to commit that mistake again. But how does adding 'ji' can categories you in a particular category? For me that only is a sign of respect for ladies whom you do not know personally.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
LOL, dont feel bad sunil, I have already made exceptions for some, see my post above, sanjeevs and Asylums where I have written that when you are not familiar it is better not to take things for granted ...I was being very general and was actually aiming at some who distort your name even after being told...BTW you can call me what you want and add on what you want
@maezee (27892)
• United States
24 Dec 12
I feel as though, it's your decision, it's your name. If you don't like it - don't do it, personally! But you cannot really judge those others who are shortening or enlongating their names. It's their decisions to do so!
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
Hi maezee, I guess you dint get my point ! What I was actually asking was whether people would be happy when we shorten their name ? and why not use the name given by the member instead of adding on prefixes like Mr, Mrs,Ji ,Aunty etc to an already given name by the member...Like for exampple if someone were to address you as maezee aunty ...
@anil02 (2886)
• India
24 Dec 12
Hello, it is common thing. It is very hard to write full name in conversastion. My full name in Anil Kumar Gupta. Like me every one have first name second name and surname. It is tradition to address some one with first name or surname. Some person use Mr. Mrs or bhai, sister, it is happen when we have relation with some one for long period.
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
Hi anil, thanks a lot for your response, shortening a name or giving any name of your choice is left to the individual and I am not actually talking about that, rather about people adding on prefixes like Mr Mrs,Ji Aunty etc to our already given name..
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
24 Dec 12
Oh yes I do that all the time here..some people have such long screen names that I cerainly do address with just the first part and in hope that its understandable...and if you had a name of 9-10 letters or more I would shorten your name also....
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
Hi bjc66bjc,Yes that is understandable and what we do is make it easier and practical since to refer using a long name each time becomes a bit difficult and that is understood - thanks a lot for sharing your views, all the best and happy mylotting
@Emvy548 (387)
• India
24 Dec 12
Someone with the name cheesecakesandwine is obviously not using his real name and hence there is no point in calling him or her 'cheese'!
@kiran8 (15289)
• Mangalore, India
24 Dec 12
No, there is no issue there since the person seems to be happy with the name and in fact many times refers to himself/herself as cheese when he or she signs off...am more concerned about people adding on prefixes to an already existing name given by the member..