I am still kind of upset about this..

United States
December 25, 2012 9:17pm CST
I talked to my mother and to bj and I feel a little better. But,not that much better to where it could leave my mind. It is all I could think about right now. but,I am going to say it here but not anywhere else. I am just going to take it as a learning lesson. This is the second year that I went out and bought gifts for my mans kids. They have not called to thank me last year or this year. I am bothered by this because I was raised to thank people for anything you are given. I am wondering what adrain could be thinking not to have his kids call and thank me for the gifts. I am really pissed over this. The bottom line is next year they are not getting a gift from me. and if he says anything to me I will lay down the law. I will ask him what is the proper thing to do when someone gives you a gift. and let him take it from there. Plus,tonight he calls me to ask me for money to buy his daughter some food. but,being we did not spend the day together you would think he would invite me to go with him. nope,he just went on his way without me. I always tell him how he leaves me out sometimes and that makes me sad. But,tonight he called and I told him I want to be alone and not talk on my phone. If you think I should not be upset pleas let me know. I will try to understand your views.
2 people like this
10 responses
@sriroshan (2586)
• India
26 Dec 12
Such do happen in our life and best thing is forget the incidence and next time when we plan to give them any gift should keep their name out of list. And why we should bother about such people who does not understand the importance and feeling behind giving the gift to them? Like you even I have experienced it in my life and do you know I have stop giving them the present on any important event to them. Such say halo and wish them, let them realize why I have acted or acting in this fashion.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 12
as soon as he walked through the door he told me that his daughter said thank you for the gifts. I don't know why it took them so long being they got it days ago. but,either way I feel better now and all is well. I would have felt better if they said this last year too.
@sriroshan (2586)
• India
29 Dec 12
Nice to read that you are relaxed after seeing that they have got the gift. After all I am sure they must be waiting for their gift and I knew from my experience that if someone had send me the gift, I was waiting anxious to get the same
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
26 Dec 12
put it behind you. Adrian needed time with his daughter and that is okay. There are times when you need time with your daughter you don't want him around as well. But more importantly, he knew you had your plate full worrying about your mother and he was giving you space. You have told us more than once that you needed your space. A couple does not have to be together 24 hours a day. You went and saw your mother, Adrian has no mother to see. But he went to be with his child who had no food and needed him. Be thankful for what you got and remember there are always people worst off than you.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 12
I have onot seen you in a long time. I know what your saying and I am sure understanding. I was fine today with him being there it was after he came for the stuff he could have asked me to take a ride with him. thanks
@bjc66bjc (6745)
• United States
26 Dec 12
Like I said before, you can only control your own behavior. There are some people who just have no manners..You did what you did from your heart, but as far as them not even showing appreciation at least by saying 'Thank You"... I just hope you learn you lesson and realize that people are not all the same...I understand you being up set and I would be also, but I would also not let it linger and just let it fall off my back and not do it ever again.. Lesson learned... We will alway come into contact with trifling and unscrupulous people and we have to deal with them accordingly,,either you accept their trifiling ways or cut them loose...you need to decide but there is no reason for you to stress yourself out about them... You have to many real issues on your plate right now with Adrian and his antics and your daughter and your mother.. I hope you will be ok, but don't let the manners or lack of manner of other bring you down.... Hold you head up and and know that you are a decent person with morals and love....
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 12
As soon as he walked through the door he told me that his daughter said thank you for the gifts. I don't know why it took them so long being they got it days ago. but,either way I feel better now and all is well. I would have felt better if they said this last year too. I am still not doing it next year. I don't see even a card they give to their father. that is not right they both have jobs.
@Eric731 (40)
• New Zealand
26 Dec 12
If i gave something to others without receiving thank, i will just forget about it -perhaps one day they will appreciate that when they grow older ( if they are kids)or they feel appreciate but don't express that. I will look into distant future. I remember that when i was little, i didn't say thanks to those who gave me gifts but now i feel very appreciate and still remember them deeply ( i will remember them forever!) although i don't have a chance to see them anymore. Just my opinion. Of course, no-one should take something for granted. One should appreciate and say thank to those who have given her or him somethings.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 12
As soon as he walked through the door he told me that his daughter said thank you for the gifts. I don't know why it took them so long being they got it days ago. but,either way I feel better now and all is well. I would have felt better if they said this last year too. These are adults not kids.
@AmbiePam (49876)
• United States
26 Dec 12
Guys just don't think about stuff like that. And in all the families I've seen, the mother is always the one that tells their offspring to thank the person who gave them the gifts. Next year don't get them anything. It's not worth it. In fact, if you can ask without being angry, I'd go ahead and ask him why he thinks his kids don't thank you for the gifts you get them.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 12
as soon as he walked through the door he told me that his daughter said thank you for the gifts. I don't know why it took them so long being they got it days ago. but,either way I feel better now and all is well. I would have felt better if they said this last year too. I did not have to because of this.
• United States
26 Dec 12
I think you have every right to be upset that he takes you for money all the time and leaves you out if his plans. His daughters may not have had any raising, Gifts. They may not know the proper thing to do. I couldn't do what you do. You buy everyone stuff at Christmas from the goodness if your heart. I hate to see that you get hurt so much.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Dec 12
as soon as he walked through the door he told me that his daughter said thank you for the gifts. I don't know why it took them so long being they got it days ago. but,either way I feel better now and all is well. I would have felt better if they said this last year too. I still think I am trimming my list next year.
@Arieles (2474)
• United States
28 Dec 12
That is such a shame. How old are Adrian's kids? My kids got a little gift from my ex's sister (my sister in law) and I thought it was so sweet. They have been told that they have to write her a letter and thank her. I thought it was very nice of her and they had so much fun spending the money that she gave them. I am also very appreciate that she thought to give them something like they are her own niece and nephew.
@Arieles (2474)
• United States
28 Dec 12
I see your view point because no one acknowledged that you gave a gift. A simple thank you would be nice. It's not like you are asking them to reciprocate the gift giving, but please at least acknowledge that you did receive the gift. I have given gifts before, sent cards, etc..and not one thank you was given. I don't know if they received the gift or not (I'm assuming they did). I was upset when my best friend didn't even tell me they received my card. It was like saying my card wasn't appreciated. I think in these situations we can continue to give and know that from this person I may not get a thank you, but that's okay because I enjoy giving to other people and I love seeing their faces brighten up when they open their gift and see it for the first time, or I can choose not to give them a gift. The choice is mine.
@dodoazo (21034)
• Philippines
26 Dec 12
Your efforts have not been acknowledgment, even just a little gesture of being thankful. Anyway if a person is so sincere in giving, he is not actually asking a return of gratefulness. I remember a passage that says, "It is more blessed to give than to receive." Anyway what you have given it will be reciprocated later, but not immediate. Do you get me? I know you're a generous giver. Aren't you?
@dodoazo (21034)
• Philippines
26 Dec 12
What I mean it not being "acknowledged" of your effort of giving.
@celticeagle (119115)
• Boise, Idaho
27 Dec 12
You like to be alone wometimes so I would think that you would understand it when he wants the same. I would just look at it that way. Kids now days don't have alot of manners. I wouldn't let it get to you too badly. I think what you have planned in that respect is fine. Take care.
@dorannmwin (36698)
• United States
27 Dec 12
I can see why you are somewhat upset about this, but then again, this would be the kind of thing that I would really not allow to bother me all that much. The reason that I wouldn't worry about it all that much is because of the fact that I tend to be the kind of person that really gets my pleasure out of doing the shopping and the good feeling that I have for giving a gift to someone. Their gratitude is something that is nice, but not something that I think of as being mandatory.