my good friend versus his evil wife

Philippines
January 6, 2013 2:33am CST
I need your advice guys. I have a very good friend named Richard He been operated 3x due to his illness a parkinson diseases through christian friend site we met ther. it's almost 2 years we been exchanging Godly words everything about the scripture.I always ask his advice when I am down and he too when he is but mostly me. He is always there and never stops to talked to me Godly words when I am depressed.When he met a girl from internet too he asked for my advice. and I build up that girls since like me He is a filipina too. I said how nice to have a filipina wife, and then he came here visit his filipina wife. and then later filled a petition and last december that filipina joined him in his place and they got married. Now the filipina know that I am friend of her. and now telling me to stop writing him and be friend of him.and accused me And tell insane words against me. I wrote this filipina and explained to her that before they met we are already friends and what we talked is only christian topic . but she answered me Stop explaining.Why is she mad to me while I am the one who influenced my friend to court her? I told her but she still doesn't listen.What shall I do?Now I see the demon on her. being mad to me without any reason at all because I am only a woman SHE is almost two decades greater than my ages and she is a little bit older to my friend.
3 responses
@JohnRok1 (2051)
7 Jan 13
You could say to her something like "I realise that because I am a younger woman you want me to stop being his friend. Will you be my friend instead?".
1 person likes this
• Philippines
10 Jan 13
SHE don't want to be friend of me i made a friend request in fb and she didn't .. yes perhaps becaus I am younger so she feel insecured. But haven't she realize that before they met. If our friendship has a malice then we should express our feelings if we do have since i am single and He too on that time but we didn't because we are like brothers and sisters in heart. If she have broad mind. She will realize that.
@JohnRok1 (2051)
10 Jan 13
I didn't realise you meant Facebook friend! I have very, very few of my friends as Facebook friends, and I can hardly handle my News Feed as it is. No, I meant real friend.
1 person likes this
• India
6 Jan 13
Hi friend, sad to hear about this, may be she suspects you both. I think she don't have the ability to understand about your good friendship. Just keep distance from your friend, as she requires it, also it is not good to continue your friendship if his wife is not interested in your contacts. It is really hard to change the mentality of the lady. So keep distance from them
1 person likes this
• Philippines
6 Jan 13
Perhaps she think what she is but because of our friendship.I influences him to marry a filipina like me and I pushed Him to court that girl. Can't she respect me as his friend and she really have evil mind thinking of me without any single evidence of flirting or any malice in our email.We just exchange about the scriptures what's wrong with that to her. or she used to be like that with what she think negatively against me that's why she think all woman is like her.My aunt has american husband before and she never judged nor get jealous with the friends of my uncle. she respect their friendship she don't think negatively against them nor judge them.
@ZoeJoy (1395)
• United States
12 Jan 13
It doesn't matter if she has any evidence of wrong doing. If she asked you to back off, then you must accept her choose. You can not control this marriage any more. You may have suggested that your friend find a wife and he did, based on your recommendation. Now, your job is OVER. Marriage is sacred. It is between TWO people. It doesn't matter what other people do or don't do. You can NOT compare people. You may not be doing anything wrong, but you do need to respect her and her request. And the only reason she is getting angry and frustrated is that you are not respecting her requests. Perhaps, later when they have been married for several years and their marriage is on more solid ground, you can be a friend to BOTH of them. Until that time, it is wise to only communicate nicely and with scripture to BOTH of them at the same time. But now, since she has made a request, you need to honor that request, in order to honor and respect their marriage.
@ZoeJoy (1395)
• United States
12 Jan 13
Is the filipina wife a Christian? If not, why did this man marry a woman who is not a Christian? Also, anytime there is an international marriage, there is a lot to deal with the different cultures and understandings. My husband and I are an international couple and we didn't realize how much of the different cultures we would be having to deal with. So, perhaps in her country and culture, it isn't appropriate or common for a man to have a friend who is a woman. Also, if you and her husband are from the same country and are the same race and ethnic background, she may feel she is at a disadvantage. She may feel that he will turn to you, rather than to her for comfort and support. She does not have the demon on her, she just doesn't understand. I would suggest that you talk to your minister. Also that your friend and his wife talk to a Christian minister. It is important now that their marriage is on solid ground. If that means that you back off, so that the two of them can establish a tighter and more solid relationship, then that maybe is what you need to do. Marriage is sacred, and it is important than nothing nor no-one gets in between the married couple.