how could i make love on averange to my two babies?

@rose66 (380)
China
January 19, 2013 5:17am CST
i am anxious recently for my girl's emotion is abnormal. because i have a new baby and need to take care of it. so most of the day time my girl stay with her aunt and only come back to sleep at night. cause my body is still weak, i cannot paly with her as before, and sometimes when she is sleepy, i am feeding the little one, so she feels that i don't love her anymore. in these two days she cries a lot for just some trifle. how could i make love on averange to my two babies?
4 responses
@ShyBear88 (18035)
• United States
19 Jan 13
Well when I had JD my mom came down and helped out for the first 2 weeks. I'm a quick healthy and was ready go like normal after a day of rest. Me and my husband make a point to trying to take each child out with us and leaving the other with family. Every Friday I got to the store with my mom and take either one of the kids some times both. My daughter has been home with us every day since her brother was 4 days old. She stay with family while I was on bed rest in a different state. Depending on her age she will take the change easy or hard. But mostly she still needs her mommy and you need to keep things at home almost like they where with a new baby. So if you can some how get her aunt to take care of her at home she'll take to her new sibling with more easy and when your newborn is sleeping try to sit down with your daughter weather it's to just talk,color something with her so she knows that you are trying to make time for her.
1 person likes this
@rose66 (380)
• China
20 Jan 13
this morning she wakes up early, i dressed her up and colored together woth her. she was happy and talked a lot with me. then the aunt comes to take her to have breakfast .hope it will be better
@ShyBear88 (18035)
• United States
20 Jan 13
That's a good start.
@dlr297 (5418)
• United States
19 Jan 13
it is not a easy thing to do, but you will learn how to put your time between the two. we have 8 children. and it is hard when you first bring the new one home because a new born requires much of your attention. I always found it helpful to let the older children help out with the new one. make them a part of what is going on. even if their is only a few years between them
1 person likes this
@rose66 (380)
• China
20 Jan 13
that's a good idea, although she is only two years old, but she can understand if you ask her to help. sometimes she even asked to hug the new baby and touch its hands and face. she says my brother is so cute
@dlr297 (5418)
• United States
20 Jan 13
yes even at 2 you can find things that she can do so she can be a part of the new baby's life. you can even have her sit next to you and let her hold the baby with your help of course. (not on her own) If you bottle feed. sit in a way that she can help by holding the bottle.
@ZoeJoy (1395)
• United States
19 Jan 13
It is not always easy to help an older child understand that you need to take care of the baby. Perhaps she can help you like fetch you the diaper or the baby toy. Let her feel part of taking care of the baby. Also, if there is a time when the baby is sleeping, perhaps that is when your aunt can keep an watchful eye on the sleeping baby while you spend some quality time with her daughter. You can read in bed to her or draw pictures with her or do a small craft that isn't too messy. Is there anyway the aunt can watch her at your home, instead of taking her out of her own home? Perhaps, if she is supervised in your own home would help her to adjust and it would not make her feel so disruptive and homesick. When I had my second child, I had a babysitter who watched my son in my own home. She would fed him and take him outside to play. My son was able to adjust to the new baby better, since he was still at home. Being away from home and then, mom having to spend time and energy for a new baby is a lot for a young child. So, perhaps, you do need to adjust yourself and your aunt's schedule to what is best for your daughter. All the best to you and congratulations to you with your new baby.
@rose66 (380)
• China
20 Jan 13
thank you for your suggestion. i talked with my husband and tried to let my girl stay at home most of the time. it's a little better when she is at home. but sleeping is a hard work. for once i go to see the new baby, my girl will wake up to cry!
@subhojit10 (7382)
• India
19 Jan 13
Thanks a ton for sharing this discussion. Well i can understand your situation and i know how it feels like when no body is around and u have so many things to handle. I think it is high time for u to talk to your girl and tell her every thing in detail. One's responsibility does not over just by giving birth to a baby in fact the responsibility begins after giving birth to a child. So she should be vigilant of her duties as a mother and not be negligent like this. What say?
@rose66 (380)
• China
20 Jan 13
i talked with her but she can not understand so much , she says it's nasty to rob mom with her. when she see i feed the baby , she asks me to hug her,if not she shinks i donot love her and cries.