I hate being the 11th responder and over

@Renhard (3480)
Jamaica
January 31, 2013 7:07pm CST
I like when I respond and someone respond back. I have been in the situation so many times where once I am on the second page, no one remembers that I exist. Especially I am the 11th and last responder exactly. Everybody just forget about me. They respond to everything else on the first page and I am here just waiting and hoping you will see me and respond. One day passed, then a next. It is now a week and still no response. It seems best that I put my hopes down and just forget that I even posted there but it doesn't feel as if what I offered had any impact on anyone at all. Are they just oblivious? Hello over here, I am hiding on the next page. Don't you see me? Click page too please.
9 people like this
31 responses
@dragon54u (31298)
• United States
1 Feb 13
Sometimes I won't respond to discussions with more than ten replies unless it's something I feel strongly about. Not because I won't get a response but because everything that can be said, probably has. If I feel very strongly about it I'll go ahead and respond because if just one person reads it I might change a mind or educate someone. It's nice when the author of the discussion acknowledges me but I don't respond contingent on their reaction. I do know how you feel, though. It's like being in the back row and trying to get someone to see you.
2 people like this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
That is a very good point about everything had been said already. I feel like that at times, but I still respond because most time I will be here searching mylot for anything interesting and can't find anything. But then I finally find something but the discussion has started such a while back, and better to give my though even if it is said in a different manner already. That at times is the only way I feel I am participating.
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31298)
• United States
1 Feb 13
Every once in awhile I'll get a notification that someone has replied to one of my discussions and I can't remember it because it was 1-5 years ago or 6 months ago. I go to reply and sometimes it's nice to see how things have changed, I didn't realize I had that attitude back then, can't believe I was worried about a little thing like that, etc. It's always nice! So don't feel reluctant to reply to old discussions--I think doing so is something everyone can enjoy, particularly the author of the original idea.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
You know it was the day before yesterday, I went back to an old discussion. And to be honest my attitude was a little stink, well for that particular discussion. I couldn't believe how immature I was. I think that discussion was about 3 years back or so. I smiled though just remembering, and thinking back about the past. Memories are nice.
@allknowing (55175)
• India
1 Feb 13
Grow up Renhard! We are all getting that treatment and with time you will get to ignore such slights if I might call them that!
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I do not want to grow up. I heard gossips that you can never get back younger once you grow up.. I do ignore such things sometimes but it is hard to ignore if you know you put special effort into writing that response. Sometimes the response is lengthy and you really wanted to hear other people opinions towards your response.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (55175)
• India
1 Feb 13
What can't be cured has to be endured Renhard. I think for the moment we all need to celebrate that myLot is back on its feet with a spring in its step!
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
Okay let us celebrate by eating some egg. Your profile picture That is if you are willing to hand it over.
1 person likes this
@AkamaruKei (5220)
• Malaysia
1 Feb 13
That not only happen to you but most of us here. If you respond in my discussion i will reply back even you are 100th responder but you should patient maybe i will comment your responses after several week. Hehe.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
Wow. You are very faithful. I guess I will have to comment on your discussions more often.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
1 Feb 13
I very satisfied when i can comment all responses. I want all my responder happy that why i comment all responses i receive.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I am curious. What is the longest discussion you ever had?
• United States
1 Feb 13
I normally will comment back to everyone who responds to me. I hate when I respond to a discussion and get no answer. It makes me feel like my answer has no value at all. I wouldn't do that to people. Sometimes though I don't get the notification which is not my fault. I'm not talking about lately..I'm talking about before the myLot glitch of no notifications. I just feel it's kind of rude to a point and most people who don't comment back I tend to not respond to in the future on their new discussions.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I agree, do unto others as you would like them to do unto you. That is it. Sometimes I do not want to blame the creator of the discussion because at times they might just not be aware that anyone responded lately due to no notification. But then there are other times when the creator skip over you and reply to before and in front of you and you start to think why did he/she actually do that.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Feb 13
Exactly and that's what I call rude. Those are the people I do not go back to their discussions anymore. I might let it go once or twice, but when it is consistent, I'm done with them....I have no use for them anymore.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
A little bit harsh but necessary. Sometimes I feel that way but most times I forget those people name or profile picture and still end up replying to them again. And then same ignoring thing happens again.
1 person likes this
@kingparker (9698)
• United States
1 Feb 13
Sorry to hear that. I usually won't mind to be in the first page or second page, as long as I contribute my effort to that particular person's discussion. I can't always expect them to respond my comments, nor I would always have time to respond every single one to my discussions. I just would do the best I can here.
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I do understand people are busy and not everyone can manage to put out their all on this site. I am curious though about those that just skip over me. You know those that respond to the responders both before and after me and just forget that I exist. Now what should I honestly think about that?
1 person likes this
@sishy7 (26740)
• Australia
1 Feb 13
Aha, that happened to you too? I've been singled out like that. I have no idea why, but for that reason the OP's username stuck on my mind and I just avoided that user since...
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
What is wrong with my mind. Why wont their name stuck in my mind like their names did for you. I think something might be wrong with my brain.
1 person likes this
@bluespygirl (2112)
• Philippines
1 Feb 13
When I start a discussion, I see to it that I read ALL the responses and I answer most of them. I also comment back to the responses that I had made. Most of us here isn't receiving notifications so I don't have a track of the responses that I had made and I can't comment back. Thus the lesser discussion thread now. I wish that most of us here are like that. Mylot is a discussion site and it is fun that way that we are discussing. I am seeing that myLot is "under construction" now repairing the glitches. I did receive some notifications and I hope ALL of things will be back to normal here. Happy myLottings!
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I have started to receive discussions again so I am also hoping that this will make more people respond back to discussions. It is hard to keep track of everything without the notifications. I usually try my best to go down the line and respond as I go down the line. That way I don't miss anyone's response. I have not met up on mylot is under construction now though. where did you see that?
• Philippines
2 Feb 13
I have just thought that myLot is under construction since things aren't normal here. . But things are slowly coming back to normal now. I received some new emails now.
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
2 Feb 13
Finally so I guess mylot is back on track for you now as well.
@sishy7 (26740)
• Australia
1 Feb 13
I read all other responses before I post mine. So most of the time I just ended up reading them all and had nothing else to say. To minimize that, I usually just open topics with 10 responses or less; so I'll have more chance to post something and because of that my response usually ended up on the first page.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
Curious. Have it ever happened to you: As you read the other responses and ready to respond, few more people respond and you still end up on the second page. Just because you were reading.
2 people like this
@sishy7 (26740)
• Australia
1 Feb 13
O yes, it happened; especially on "hot topics" such as the ones usually started by Lamb. I usually catch his late because of the time difference; but even on rare occassions when I catch his when he just started it, I'd still end up on second page if I were to respond at all... I don't mind being on second page here, I knew you were going to comment back...
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I always try my best. I got to say Lambie always have some nice and hot discussions you know. Even though sometimes he is ranting.
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
1 Feb 13
Well, I think the problem is a little bit solved. Maybe it's about the glitch we're having so no email notifications sent and maybe that happened just after you responded. And sometimes people won't bother to look at their own discussions just because they don't get any email.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I hope so. I will give it some time and see if it was the glitch causing the problem alone. I don't really think so but let us just experiment by just observing.
1 person likes this
@MissPiggy (1751)
• Indonesia
1 Feb 13
And also, you better think they skip you. That's what I often do.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I know that is a great possibility.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Feb 13
I think that the situation will improve somewhat now that the notifications are back. However, there will always be some people who either don't comment back at all or only respond to a few responses and, then, seem to run out of enthusiasm for the discussion.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I am happy that notification are finally fix. But some people wont change have you have stated. I am thankful for those who try to respond back, it makes me feel as if I have not wasted my time.
@Hatley (157941)
• Garden Grove, California
1 Feb 13
renhard you might suggest to the discussion poster if someone skips you that they are being insulting by skipping and playing favorites. it might wake them up as to how to treat others here.
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
It ran through my mind once but then I don't want to seem unfair, because some people honestly might not have so much time on their hands for mylot. SO they just choose the easiest things to reply to. I have no idea, I am just assuming.
@ShepherdSpy (8563)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
1 Feb 13
As long as you're bringing something to the discussion that's worth responding to,then you deserve a response...the "Me too" type of thing is frowned upon here,but a genuine,thoughtful answer should be appreciated and commented on.
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
Now Imagine at times when I am the first or second responder, and my thoughts are genuine but yet still the creator of the discussion skips over me and respond to others. I start to feel like that is unfair. And most times it is the ones I really put in the effort and I really wanted to hear what the creator had to say. But no, he just had to skip over it.
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
3 Feb 13
yep,definitely sucky to have made a genuine,thoughtful contribution and get passed over..
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
3 Feb 13
You understand perfectly.
• United States
1 Feb 13
I don't mind responding on one of the first 2 pages of a discussion. Beyond that, I figure that I really can't contribute any more to the discussion. At least I will have put in my penny's worth.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
. So what do you think about those discussions that are over 100 responses. I wonder what the 100th responder was thinking.
• United States
1 Feb 13
I really don't even go in and look at the ones that have more than 5 or 6 pages.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
In the past I remember how every minute there was an interesting discussion to reply to. Recently I would think with mylot being more populated there would be even better discussions, but the past was better in my opinion. Now it seems as if I have search many discussion before I find one that is interesting. And then as soon as I find such, I realize it has so many responses already. So I decide to just still reply in hopes that I would get a reply weeks down the road. Because it is better I participate than just stare on the site the whole day.
@namiya (1599)
• Philippines
3 Feb 13
This happens to most of us here and I use to wonder then when my response was being skipped while the others were commented back. I concluded that maybe mine was not fitting enough and had no choice but respect this. Now if ever my response is not commented back, I don't let let this affect me but if this is done by the same user for more than a couple of times then maybe I'll just avoid being involved in any of his future discussions.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
3 Feb 13
I guess that is the correct approach. Just observe for a few times and if the situation persists then just ignore.
1 person likes this
@ajithlal (14564)
• India
18 Feb 13
I also think it can happen to anyone and can happen sometimes consistently. I hope you come to the first page itself in the future.
@rosekiss (30152)
• Eugene, Oregon
3 Feb 13
I know what you mean, as more and more discussions are started, our discussions are moved down until they are no longer on the first page. I feel though that if my discussions are interesting enough, they will seek them out and respond. I have had responses to discussions of mine that are way down the list, but still getting responses. It all depends on the individual, as some won't go down to many pages before the move on to other interests. I have done that myself, but I will respond to discussions, that are on the tenth page, if the discussion interests me. I just keep going until I can't find any others to respond to that I am interested in, and then I just move on to a different interest, and start over again. Take care, and have a very good day.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
3 Feb 13
Okay I understand what you are saying. Well I am similar to that except if I am the owner of the discussion I try my best to reply to everyone, just to show respect. With interesting responses, what I post starts to flow better.
1 person likes this
@besweet (7340)
• Greece
1 Feb 13
The past few weeks have been a bit weird without the notifications, I didn't get many responses either. The second page is forgotten sometimes, that is true! Even in my own discussions, I might forget about it sometimes! If there is a third page, the second one will still be the most neglected! I can't explain why this happens! Lol
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
You understand. The second page gets left out so many times. It feels as if there are many responses, people just forget that the second page exists
1 person likes this
@echoforever (5192)
• United States
1 Feb 13
I always hope to be responded back to. Not always will it happen and sometimes it will, when I least expect it. All we can do is give our best and hope someone comes back for us to have some discussion.
1 person likes this
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I guess you are right. Even if it takes two years. I wonder which creator responds back to their discussion after so long. I mean after so long because that is definitely a long time.
@ShyBear88 (16874)
• United States
1 Feb 13
well it's not a popularity contest some people answer people some don't at all. I answer people no matter what page they are. They don't get paid if they don't answer you get paid if you answer there discussion.
1 person likes this
@asliah (11149)
• Philippines
18 Feb 13
hi, for me i don't care if where my user is,even i am the last user who response to the discussion because the important for me is to response,share my ideas and opinions and of course to be counted in my earning here in mylot.
1 person likes this
• Jacksonville, Florida
1 Feb 13
I hate it more when my response is ignored when everyone around is getting a response. Like the discussion starter will answer response one, I'm the second responder and I get nothing said to me and they will answer everyone else on the page!! I'm like why do people do that? Its not like I'm a rude person or something, I will never understand that one either...
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
That has happened to me already and I absolutely hated it. I mean they skipped over me, and most times I even put extra effort into making that response great and they just ignored it. Sometimes it makes me feel as if I should ignore his/her discussions all together, because I hate being ignored when I put effort into writing.
• Jacksonville, Florida
1 Feb 13
When the person is rude I understand ignoring them but I am not a rude person so I don't like being ignored for no reason! It drives me crazy when people do that it really does and its happened to me a few times. The last time it happened I asked the person why I was being ignored. Did no good since they still ignored me!
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
You PM the person? and still no response. That is being ignored to a next level. I would be upset as well. I would be really curious though as to why, you are ignoring me. Really curious, so curious I wouldn't been able to take it off my mind.
• Canada
1 Feb 13
In all honesty I pretty much always respond to EVERY response to a discussion that I start. Reason being is that it's all about respect. If someone is going to respect me enough to respond to my discussion, I will at least have the same respect to answer them no matter what page it is on. I actually get pretty stoked when I get more than one page of responses because then it means my discussion is a good one!
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
I try my best to do as you do as well. Even if I am sleepy. I love your point though, about respect. I really love it. Do you classify this as a good discussion then, seeing that it is already in its second page?
1 person likes this
• Canada
1 Feb 13
Honestly the definition of a good discussion depends on everyone's personal preference. What I find interesting, informative, fun, cute, or an awesome discussion someone else might not. BUT seeing as you are up to 3 pages now I would say it is doing quite well, congrats to you! I feel that respect should be given and received on and offline, to me it's part of being human.
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
1 Feb 13
Oh thank you. I coming down with the flu
1 person likes this
@Nursefrai06 (2498)
• Penrith, Australia
2 Feb 13
I hate that too, like really feel bad about it. I wonder I'd we still get related though If we stay far too behind on the pages. It's kind of weird that the latest comments go on the last page, maybe they should do the opposite? What do you think? :)
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
2 Feb 13
You know that ran through my mind once, why not make the latest response be at top but then it would be unfair for the ones that replied earlier because they would take longer to get a response if the discussion is hot. Can you imagine you replied to my discussion first but got a reply back the next two days because I keep on starting from page one. And the person who just replied got a response before you.
• Penrith, Australia
2 Feb 13
Don't start replying on page one then? haha! I don't know. Maybe the highest rated comments on the first then? Hmm, but I figure that would be the same as it is now since the ones at the first page gets the most comments. .
@Renhard (3480)
• Jamaica
2 Feb 13
Avatar Problem - I have notice that sometimes your avatar show and other times it doesn't.
You surrender? I think the best way is as it is already. Just try to reply. That is all. I realized that your avatar sometimes show a pic and other times don't I mean I don't know what is up with your display pic. I will print my screen and show you .