Torn between telling the truth or not ....but how?

@jenny1015 (13389)
Philippines
February 6, 2013 3:41am CST
Just this morning, i have learned that my husband's nephew dropped two of his subjects out of the 4 subjects he is taking this semester. The boy and my brother in law had a fight over this. Of cause everybody else was worried about the kid. For a brief background about the kid, he is the son of my husband's youngest brother out of wedlock. From the time the kid was born, he grew up with their family. The mother was, well, let's just say,not the mother type. So the kid was in full custody of my husband's family and followed their name. The mother was given a small amount. I don't know what was that all about. But it was sort of relinquishing her duties and obligation to the kid. Anyway, the kid grew up under the care of my elder SIL, up until he was on 4th grade and then my mother in law took care of him since then. I have felt that this kid has always been the favorite among the grandchildren. Well, by the time the kid was under their wing, the kid showed signs of being irresponsible. He fails some of his subjects. Now to the present time..I asked my eldest son who is close to the kid if he knew about the dropped subjects, then he said no. Now he tells me that this kid is on drugs. Now how do I tell them about this? I do not want to be the monster here. Help!
3 people like this
4 responses
@dodoazo (20297)
• Philippines
6 Feb 13
Well if that will be your side that you don't want to the "monster" so what's the discussion all about. Anyway, let us put it in a proper perspective. Since the kid lacks parental guidance, he should be given so much attention or later on it is beyond repair. The kid will suffer and everybody in the approximate family will be affected. And that is not that it should to be. Call up the kid. Have a heart to heart talk with him. Show that he is being cared.
1 person likes this
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
6 Feb 13
Thanks, dodazo! I think that is a great idea. I just hope he opens up to me and not think that we are all against him.
@sshiva95 (77)
• India
7 Feb 13
If the kid has some respect for you or some attachment with you, then it would be best for you to confront the kid personally in a calm & gentle manner and make him realize his mistake. If that doesn't work out then tell the kid's dad or your husband but tell them not to get mad. Either way you are going to have to tell the truth because if you don't, you too become responsible in destroying his life as you failed to intervene at the right time
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
7 Feb 13
Thanks! I have also thought about that. I has been thinking about it last night and even wished that I shouldn't have known about it so I wouldn't get myself involved but then again, what would become if his life if nobody knew about it.
@mods196621 (3631)
• Philippines
7 Feb 13
Lets concentrate on how you will tell the truth about what is the boy situation now. Really that is a big issue to the family. Considering that today's trend among the young are different with young ones of our my age backward 40 decades ago. Now to continue about your problem you must tell them about him. It is your responsibility as elder to correct also the wrongdoing of this young boy. Don't be afraid to tell them as soon as possible about this for the early action on how they'll do the solution regarding this problem. It is not the family problem only but the society too. He need the help as early as we can before everything is too late. You need to tell them to save the life of this minor kid. You will do this for his good future and who knows someday he become a good servants of this nation. Like become a priest a president and so on. Lets save those young's of today.. We will pray for you to have you courage my friend... Prayer is the best weapon to all... have a nice day and be happy!
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
7 Feb 13
Thanks, mods! I am deeply touched with your response. I hope that I could get over with it soon.
@KrauseHome (35326)
• United States
22 Feb 13
Personally, you would think that unless the MIL is too busy to be concerned with something like this, then it is important for them to see this type of reaction and behavior and want to do something about it. Too many times things happen in kids lives that live at home just because everyone is too busy to notice and care. You just need to find a subtle way to mention this and hope somehow she will want to wake up to this, and try and do something to help change this. Knowing this and never say anything and something major happening could only make it worse for you in the end.