I am not the only one or am I?

@allknowing (69320)
India
March 12, 2013 10:13pm CST
I was strolling in my garden this morning and a thought occurred to me. Whenever I have to face an adverse situation I get relief thinking that there are others too who face the same situation. What I fail to understand is why should that give me relief. Have you felt this way any time. If not you are truly blessed. Do share your views on this.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@jenny1015 (13389)
• Philippines
13 Mar 13
Just knowing that it also happens to other people would make you feel a bit at ease. At least you don't feel like being in a situation that only you have been involved with. And somehow, you get to know how others were able to get out of the mess.
• Penrith, Australia
13 Mar 13
a fool learns from their own mistakes. A wise man learns from the mistakes of others.
@allknowing (69320)
• India
13 Mar 13
My point is why are humans made that way. Why do we feel relieved when others also have similar problems. It stinks, if you ask me, even though I am one of them!
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
13 Mar 13
We are certainly not happy with the problems of other people allknowing because what happens to others is none of our business.But we are able to go take a decision or something in a given situation by taking lessons from similar experiences. I feel it is cause for concern only if we are happy with another person's misery; I feel we will be looking only at their solution. For e.g. if you have an illness or exploitative people around you and if you think of other people with similar situations what would be your reaction? If this'other' person has been unsuccessful in treatment or handling wicked people would you give second thought to them? Or would you feel happy ? No.
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
13 Mar 13
We are all human after all allknowing! it is natural to be afraid of certain situations ; I would certainly ask for similar experiences when there is an illness or I also tend to narrate a similar experience to an afflicted person. We do this because we feel diffident at a particular point of time and are bogged down by the adversity.We get solace from the thought that there are others who have faced a similar situation and we also take lessons and reassurance by pondering as to how they have got on with life This thought gives us courage that we have not been singled out for some special misery.
@allknowing (69320)
• India
13 Mar 13
Can we not convert this attitude into a situation where we thank God atleast others are not in that state?. Is that so difficult kala? The more I delve into the kind of human beings we are, the more I get disillusioned. I have yet to meet any one in my circle who has this attitude where he/she would not want others to have the problem whatever that is they are having.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
13 Mar 13
As I had written in the earlier response, we are not happy about other people's problems allknowing. Our school did not teach us such sense of values.You are suddenly getting too introspective for your own good and are confused. ] Do you rejoice at other people's suffering?--No 2] Do you want to see other people suffer the same way or undergo what you are going through/-No 3] Are you glad that there are others sailing in the same boat—No. 4] Are you relieved that there are others sailing in the same boat? —Do you feel there is hope for you --yes—. 5] When in a difficult situation, you think of some other person and just imagine that this person is worse than you and you have been fortunate to be however you are—Yes. Why?—because there are millions of people who are worse off than what we ourselves are and we should take solace from the thought. It is a, positive attitude. — So, what is wrong?
@allknowing (69320)
• India
13 Mar 13
If the one suffering saw every one else was having a great time I doubt if that would be considered an ideal situation by the one who is suffering.Just saying.
@leateagee (3667)
• China
13 Mar 13
. There is relief because you are not the only one. Though you may not know who is experiencing the same situation you are now, there is someone for sure. There is no exception.
@allknowing (69320)
• India
14 Mar 13
It would be great if we humans were able to face our problems without having to look around and get consolation from the fact that others too are in the same boat.
@leateagee (3667)
• China
14 Mar 13
We don't live just for ourselves and by ourselves. The consolation we get is a way for us to go on with life. Without these facts, we have nothing look forward and look back at.
@allknowing (69320)
• India
14 Mar 13
I did not say that we should not live for others. What I said was taking consolation from the fact that others too are having problems will not make us strong. We will not solve our problems in the manner they should be.
@ally12 (1204)
• Philippines
13 Mar 13
Same here..Some kind of relief or inspiration. It gives a realization that if they can beat the odds why cant I.
@allknowing (69320)
• India
13 Mar 13
That is a positive outlook. But the thought 'why only me' also gets entertainment many a time and this thinking is what I am concerned about. Why are human beings made that way?
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
13 Mar 13
I was not talking of 'why only me' in all my responses so far. If it were this I would have straightaway said that it ought not to be there and if it is we will have to consciously fight against it. With some training and mind control one will be able to achieve this. I am sure it is there with you because you would not have come back fighting after that traumatic accident of yours.
• Indonesia
14 Mar 13
Sometimes I feel that way. When I feel that my problem is too hard to handle, someone or some people will always say: it's life, you are not the only one who have that problem, some people get hard time too, it's not a big matter comparing to what I have been through, etc. Well it may not give me help to solve my problem directly . But it does help me mentally that if others can survive why can't I?
@allknowing (69320)
• India
14 Mar 13
We all feel the same but would it not be nice that we become strong enough to face whatever that bothers us without having to look around for consolation?
@natliegleb (5184)
• India
13 Mar 13
no you are the one in million who felt the same way and it is usual and ordinary stuff,nothing to worry about
@allknowing (69320)
• India
13 Mar 13
When the world population is running into crores what is a million!