Something Came Up

I totally agree with you! And when I do meet those kind of people, I don`t invite them anymore if it`s within my power to do so. That sentence "something came up" is not an excuse. I can understand if there was an accident: but that is not "something" that "comes up".

like you, i have experienced this kind of excuses from people who simply sent a message to FB and SMS that they would not be able to make it to the event. initially, they agreed to come and attend, but for some reasons, they could not attend anymore. you are right when you said that the people who expected them must have the reasons why they could not make it. by simply saying something came up does not justify or serve as a good reason.

It makes you wonder what could be that important that you get a second place. Surely whatever came up was after they received the invitation. It is but right that they explain why what came up later was more important!

I am guilty for making excuses as such. But it is msinly becausr I wouldn't want to make my husband look that bad. Friends woud invite me for a get together. Of ciyrse I am always excited to see them and have long talks with them However, my husband us a bit of a jerk. He wouldn't alliw me to meet up with friends. Why? I really am not sure. Maybe he got thst idea from his dad who always wanted.her mom to be always at home. They find friends unimpirtant and think of them as users. Geez! How coukd they use me when I donÆt even have the perks in life that they have!

A friend of mine Always give the same reason (I am ill). She does make the appointment with us to do something together, to let our kids play together but there is Always something comming in between. The something is her being ill (in reality I think her husband is at home so we are not allowed to come over because if so he is giving her a hard time). About 12 days ago we met and she invited us all for dinner (yesterday). Well again she was ill (now she invited us for Saturday/tomorrow but I already have other plans). To be honest I don't even take her invitations seriously anymore. I invited her for my son's birthday but if she doesn't show up I can't help. It's up to her. The "something came up" I also don't understand. I think most people who do use this line are not honest otherwise they would tell you the reason why they didn't show up or can't make it. I would do so.. or should I say.. worser.. I go no matter if I am broke or have to leave my children alone or cancel other things. An appointment is an appointment, a promise is a promise. But I gave up to ask why, how or what.

I was going to reply to this discussion but something came up. LOL. Yes that is a lame excuse, which is actually a euphemism for I didn't want to go. People think its more polite but in fact it's very insulting.

Like you, i don't like also that kind of attitude, it is annoying. I myself i see to it that if I say something or i have a schedule for a meeting, i see to it that i can attend, i'm very conscious about my credibility. And if in case that something went wrong about the schedule or let say their is a conflict, i have no choice but to sacrifice the other one. And i feel ashamed if other people is waiting for me, and i might be the cause to ruin a particular meeting.

you put alot of pressure on people, i see. maybe something did come up and they just didn't want to go into details. no one owes anything to anyone. if they agreed to hang out, come to an event, whatever..it was out of the their own free will. they are allowed to cancel. no one owes anyone anything is, all i am saying. this is why i don't have friends. friends expect. i just can't give anymore of myself that way.

When we say we are going somewhere and or we will be there, we keep our word. Unless of course we are sick or an emergency happened. Then we call to explain in details the problem as to why we will not be able to make it. Thankfully this hasn't happened to much in my life. I definitely understand saying "something came up" does not sound good at all. It is like saying you didn't care to be there.

For people who have that line as an excuse, it means that it is something that when you came to know about it, you can say - oh you can postpone that for another day , but not this.

Yep, I would be irritated to. At least offer something specific and we don't have to go into details. Whenever I have to break an engagement with some friends, and I am running out of time, I admit I have said that something came up, but I follow it up with "I'll explain later". And I make sure that I did call them and explain. Or I would say something like, "Sorry I can't make it, something came up. Call me tonight and I will explain." Then when they called, I would explain. I owe them that.

If I really have something to do, I will go into detail, and tell the person what I have to do, and why I can't meet with them, if they understand fine, and if they don't understand well that fine to, if they never want to have, anything else to do with me, I don't cry over it believe me.

Yes, I agree with you. I also hate with the people who does not tell me detail about the reason why he does not come to my invitation. I do not force him but I want he give me a reason but not waste argument to hide his thought that he does not want to come. i know it is his right but I also have right to get the logic reason, because i have respect to him by invite him in my event. Have a nice day...

I'm with you on this one. If you invite someone out for something, they say they can go, then back out at the last minute with "Something came up" and they don't tell you what that 'something' is, then screw them! I would confront them, strongly suggest they tell you what is more important than the plans they made with you. If there were ever a circumstance where you had to back out last minute, I'm sure you wouldn't hesitate to let them know why you couldn't make it. Unless it seems like a legitimate reason they're giving you, don't invite them out again, and let them know why. At least that's what I would do. Stuff like that really grinds my gears!

hi leateagee yes people do do that a lot and I always have wondered what they were covering up. Like maybe they really wished they had not accepted my invitation? I never do that as I just give the reason why I had the change of plans.something came up sounds more like a business term not something you would use personally at all. Its sloughing off your real reason for not coming to whatever you invited them to. I think its just good sense and common courtesy to give the reason you cannot make the affair you are turning down.But I guess common sense is in small demand these days.

This is the problem with virtual communication. It is so easy to just say something came up on mobile phone or facebook.:)