will you marry a man who without a house?
By Dora1009
@Dora1009 (7)
China
March 26, 2013 4:29am CST
A house means so much for a Chinese family that many Chinese women request that their would-be husbands must have houses,these women believe that house can bring them stable life,can make them happy.But for most young people,a house is a huge burden.For salary is low and house is expensive in China,many yong people have no the ability to buy a house,even ordinary young peole loan to buy a house,they have to support a house for their whole rest working life.So it's hard to marry a woman for an Chinese ordinary young man,because most of women want to marry rich men who have house and big house.
On the other hand,many rich Chinese men have another one or more lovers even they have married,even sometimes their wives know that.Those women bear the betrayal of their husband for rich life,and those lovers bear the blame of society for rich life,too.
The question is,will you marry a man who without a house,or a man betray you?
5 people like this
33 responses
@RandomnessPrincessx3 (280)
• United States
26 Mar 13
Marriage means you're tied down, like together forever. If the man doesn't have a place there are a lot of reasons marriage wouldn't work. So no, without a house I wouldn't rush into a marriage. On the contrary, I wouldn't want a man to betray me either. I'd rather stay single than choose :-)
1 person likes this
@alpha9180 (301)
• Malaysia
27 Mar 13
I do agree with you having a house is very important as it is a basic need for a family. However, not all man are able to possess a house prior to marriage if his financial strength is weak. Majority of the couples are trying to own a house before marriage and they both share the responsibility in buying the house. Most important is the man must be diligent, know how to love and care for the family. Even though he may be weak financially initially, through years of diligent to work and earn a living he will also have a bright future. Marrying a rich man may not guarantee a good life.
1 person likes this
@silverfox09 (4708)
• United States
26 Mar 13
I will marry a man without a house because we are similar age and I dont have one we will both build our future together . We will have the dream house we both contribute to with our personal touches .
I think all over the world woman stay in bad relationship because they dont want to work .
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85127)
• Valdosta, Georgia
26 Mar 13
I married my husband when he had no house, no car, no job and no money. I admit I was scared about all of that but I trusted him that he would provide. And I was right, he does provide and take care of us.
When your in love having material things like this should not matter, your love should be the most important thing...
@alpha9180 (301)
• Malaysia
27 Mar 13
Hi LMB, I do agree with you. Not all man can afford to buy a house before marriage. I had a girl friend who married to a man without a house, a car, no job and no money just like what you had experienced. However, the man whom she married had a stable job and eventually climbing up the management ladder. He is a very diligent and caring man. He never failed to provide for the family and love, care for his family very much. Besides, having a stable job he eventually owned a house, a car and some savings for the family.
@ladysilver (370)
•
26 Mar 13
I don't know about Chinese women but here women do marry men who have no houses.Young families live with their parents, rent some apartment or take loans.I think that all the women in China won't get rich husbands, so they will have to marry someone without a house too.It would be great if the women's family had house, then the problem would be solved.Why they want men to be rich?Here they want rich women too.Women who come from rich families are the most desired wives now.
@hunibani (720)
• Philippines
26 Mar 13
I am a woman. I am not gonna marry a man without a house. If he is planning to get a family he should have a house to keep the family together than living with parents. I want my family to be secure in house. Family is a main priority and need to have secure household. If a man has no home, where do he think to put his wife and kids? xx
@Angelpink (4035)
• Philippines
26 Mar 13
Hi ! Oh that is so loud and honest ! it is good to hear that , women nowadaya are frank and practical, that is so good to hear , it means they are that serious building a family. This is a challenge to the men , that if they don't have the capacity then better not to pursue the plans of getting married. I love your whole idea ! Women should have a say in building a family since she would be the foundation of values in the family. But in our place , the men only tries to finds and builds a house after getting married. They only starts to build a house if wife is already there usually this is the practice in our country . At first year after getting some married couples rents a house or lived with parents , from there they then starts to build their own house then if it is done thats the time they will transfer to their new house.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
27 Mar 13
I did not expect the man that was going to marry me come with accessories. Just after I finished my college and got a job I applied for a housing loan to build my own house on the land that my mom gave me. When I met my future husband the house was in the midst of construction. soon after my house was completed we got married and moved in to the new house. We stayed in that house for 25 years before moving to my present house last year, a house that was also given by mom. My husband should consider himself the luckiest man as his burden as the family provider has been halved. I fear not if he betrays me as I think I can fend for myself but so far he has been a good boy except for his bad drinking habits. 
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
29 Mar 13
There are different types of houses, there are expensive ones (large) and there are the basic ones. I think as long as the guy has a small house or at least has plans of having one in the future is enough. What will you do with a house that's too big but you can't even see your husband because he's always with other women?
@gitfiddleplayer (10362)
• United States
27 Mar 13
I know that women are wanting security, there is nothing wrong with that at all. I don't understand how a woman can trade a dishonest and cheating husband for a big house, I'm an American and the "American Dream" is to own a house, two cars and be financially stable, if a woman doesn't get that then she's thinking more about the material things in life than about love. I wouldn't stay, I'm a man, I wouldn't expect a woman to put up with that, nothing is worth your own worth.
@alottodo (3056)
• Australia
27 Mar 13
I don't know about the question will I marry a man without a house or a man who betray me? well I say I won't marry any! I can have a better life as a single person then! societies are different in many ways when I married my first husband we built a house together and it lasted for 16 years and it was good and after that it's a different story!
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
27 Mar 13
When my husband and I decided to get married I had an apartment, but my husband still lived with his parents. My husband had a monthly income, but he also had a lot of debt because he had borrowed money, invested the money and lost the money. I knew about the debt when I chose to marry him. We still didn't pay off all the debt, but I love my husband and that is more important to me than the amount of money he has in the bank or his material possesions. In the beginning we lived in my apartment and he both had to take an extra job in order to earn enough money. It was quite hard in the beginning, but since that time things have improved and we have managed to buy our own house today.
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
27 Mar 13
Id think if you loved, it really would not matter if he had a house or not. But seems every country is different.
@javeddilshad (2)
• Mumbai, India
11 Jul 14
It is not very easy to admit it yes;;but it does not not mean that a man without house will not be good to his responsibilities.Man of this category if loving,caring and responsible to you and your needs will perform good.This will bring sound and co-operative efforts for the couple and then it will win.
@youless (112113)
• Guangzhou, China
27 Mar 13
The house is important, but the most important is the person who you are going to married with. Of course it is better that he can have a stable and good career. And it will be an advantage that he has a good look. Of course he shall be healthy etc. If you have so many requirements for a man, on the contrary, are you the princess? I think the girls shall pay attention to whether these will be the right men for themselves. As everything can be changed in the future. Your wealth will be increased when both of you work hard and make some efforts.
@jaiho2009 (39142)
• Philippines
27 Mar 13
When me and husband got married- he doesn't own a house but he has a good job.
After a year- he was able to build our house and provide us a good life.
House is important to everyone (married or not)- but love is not all about material things.
As long as there is love, support and trust with each other- a married couple can stand the test of time and soon reach their dream one by one.
@sjvg1976 (41131)
• Delhi, India
27 Mar 13
hi Dora,
Yes to have one's own house is good but sometimes it is not in the reach for someone to buy his own house. People sometime buy house after marriage. Its all depends on the money. I won't mind if I were a girl and my would be husband does not have his own house only thing is there should be love in a couple.
@missjahn (4574)
• Philippines
27 Mar 13
and my answer is that, you do not need to marry a man because of his belongings. but if it is a tradition, it can be broken but by some it is a terrible idea to do so. it is like a cancer that is spreading to those who believe in it. well, when fate do the calling, we do not have a choice but to follow the desire of the heart. i can say that, the two of you can weave your dreams on the run of your relationship. house is not the only basis why you should marry a man. you consider his attitude as well. and that if you love him, it must be for no reason.
if i were to chose, i will choose the man without a house rather to choose a married man. thanks for sharing this discussion :)
@chanks143 (22)
•
27 Mar 13
In my opinion a big NO. House is important in every culture not only for Chinese girl I think. Real estate is very expensive specially in cities. If one is determined and have a dream a house can be bought and built. Betraying anybody is not good. If the same things happen with the betrayer then what will happen?
@merylpan (37)
•
27 Mar 13
when I married with my husband, he do not have a house, later we have a baby, the life without an own house is unhappy, later we buy a house far from the city(because it's not so expensive), because of that house, we gave up our jobs, we work at home --become self employed, now my baby go to kindergarten, I find a new job near my house, my husband still work at home, we hope our life become better.
