Not sure this relationship is working any more....
May 22, 2013 6:57pm CST
I've got to be the biggest fool when it comes to relationships. I manage to keep finding the same type of man-one that is self-centered and inconsiderate. I thought I was being smart-I wrote down the qualities I was looking for in a partner, and also the things that were an absolute no-no. Guess what? In less than three years, Jim has turned out to be an older but thinner version of my ex husband, and it's really making me upset. Right now, I have about $6 to my name-and that's it. I no longer have a car of my own, nor do I know of anyone who'd take me in. My health went south REALLY fast in the last 18 months. I've tried looking for a job, but not even Walmart wants me. And being down this much isn't helping. I'm not crying publicly on Facebook, like another friend is; I'm too private to make strangers that see my face privy to what's happening behind closed doors. Plus there's a lot of people that I'm no longer close to that could see my misfortune, and frankly, there's a reason I'm no longer close to them. Tonight was the last straw. It's pushing 90 outside and very high humidity. I stay indoors with the AC because of how it affects me. Jim knew it was bad out there, and after last summer's day trip that nearly killed me, I thought he'd remember and take it easy on me. (I was struggling to get back to the mall next to Steamtown, but I think most people thought I was drunk. Jim had totally ignored me, so I was alone during this embarrassing walk). Nope! His dog Yoda, who pulls when he walks, began barking frantically. Jim tried to ignore it, so I asked him if he planned to take the dog out. Of course this starts a fight, and he's trying to push me aside (I just shampooed the carpets today, so I resigned myself to taking him out) when I was trying to find a tshirt. I can still feel where his hand was on my arm. Although I'm not truly scared of him (he makes me so angry), I should be. I was told by his brother that he used to beat one of his wives, and I know his first wife claimed physical abuse from reading the divorce papers. Jim denies all of this, but I'm really having my doubts. I'm not going to steal money from him, unless it becomes imperative for me to make my escape. But I'll be sure to save a bit from the household money while I figure out somewhere to go that's far away. Just needed to vent.
4 people like this
• United States
3 Jan 16
Actually, a LOT has become better @GardenGerty. We ended up marrying at the end of 2013, and have even moved from that little apartment that we were living in (and that improved both of our moods).