Important questions about romantic kissing *(for adults only)*

@topffer (37792)
France
August 15, 2015 10:02am CST
WTF ? According to a study published by a research scientist at Indiana University, Romantic kisses are not something universal. They define a romantic kiss "as lip-to-lip contact that may or may not be prolonged". Described like this Russians are the most romantic people in the world, as they do it at their office to say good morning to their co-workers every day, but maybe the study includes also French kisses and other forms of romantic kisses(I am opened to new experiences). I would like to know the exact experimental protocol used to find that only 55% of cultures in North-America were engaged in romantic kissing ? Did he asked women met in the street to give him a romantic kiss ? Is it only a book knowledge ? I would also be interested to learn what are doing the 45% of people who do not know what is a romantic kiss to show their love : are they rubbing noses or what ? I also read that there is "no evidence of romantic kissing in Central America." Then, is it because they are too shy, or real beasts ? If this study correct or pure BS ? maybe have we here some Central Americans members or some members who dated Central Americans ? If somebody in the class is from a culture not knowing what is a romantic kiss, raise the hand, please. And if your life would not have been the same without a romantic kiss, your welcome too in this discussion. PS : Do not forget that this site is only for PG-rated discussions. Keep this one romantic.
Justin Garcia, research scientist at Kinsey Institute, is the co-author of a new study that looked at 168 cultures throughout the world to better understand where kissing does and doesn’t occur.
20 people like this
20 responses
@thesids (22351)
• Bhubaneswar, India
15 Aug 15
Do the participants in the class also get to the "hands on" or DIY thing too
4 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
Do you need special lessons, BusySids?
3 people like this
@thesids (22351)
• Bhubaneswar, India
15 Aug 15
@purplealabaster special.. I had almost forgotten that the word exists in my context...
3 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
@thesids You are special in many different ways.
3 people like this
@mythociate (16298)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
15 Aug 15
hmm ... growing up, 'kissing' was (for me) about what 'hooking-up with a romantic-partner' is now ... when Beauty & the Beast and such (Disney) stories held that 'a climactic kiss from your one true love' was the cure-all for whatever "curse" needed to be lifted. Now 'true love's kiss' is just something you share with a sibling (a la FROZEN). Although they still do "You may kiss the bride" at weddings ... which may pull 'the kiss'-standard down even further
• United States
15 Aug 15
First, it is funny that you mentioned "true love's kiss", because I just watched Maleficent last night, and I suspected who the "true love" was before it was revealed. I do not necessarily think that it is a bad thing or untrue, because family should love you truly and unconditionally, although it does not always happen that way. Second, since you mentioned the "you may kiss the bride" at weddings, I wonder what they say when it is two men being married. FYI, they do say "you may kiss the bride" when it is two women, so perhaps they say "you may kiss the groom" when it is two men.
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
I did not thought about this when I started this discussion but there are a lot of love kisses in Disney cartoons. The one with the prince in Beauty and the Beast is sexy. I remember another touching kiss in Lady and the Tramp between the two dogs. All of us have seen these cartoons when we were children and it probably influenced us. Today marriages are more marriages of love than marriages of convenience, so I think that the kiss has its place during weddings, more than some others old weddings traditions, like the one with the garter of the bride (I do not know if it exists in the USA), that can be humiliating for the woman.
3 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
@purplealabaster A mayor here always says "You may kiss each other"
2 people like this
@dawnald (84142)
• Shingle Springs, California
15 Aug 15
Don't know about most cultures, but I knew it wasn't the custom in some cultures.
4 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
You are also a gipsy dancer today ? You are three in this discussion. I knew about Eskimos, but I thought that it was something quite universal.
5 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
I knew that some cultures did not think that "public displays of affection" were appropriate, but I did not know that they did not believe in doing it at all.
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
@purplealabaster True ! How can they tell what they are doing at home ?
1 person likes this
@Inlemay (17248)
• South Africa
8 Jun 16
ha ha ha - reading this at my age - I want to be young again and start all over
3 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
8 Jun 16
I had completely forgotten this discussion. I would also like to be younger
2 people like this
@Inlemay (17248)
• South Africa
8 Jun 16
@topffer I came upon it by accident on the side panel - I love it - ha ha ha I have just shared it with my ADULT friends
3 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
8 Jun 16
@Inlemay Thank you, I had fun when I wrote it. For the moment, responders played the game and kept it at PG rated level, I hope it will last.
2 people like this
@Beatburn (4202)
• Philippines
14 Feb 16
This could be a good Valentine's Day discussion. I am now trying to recall all the romantic kisses...
3 people like this
@jaboUK (56222)
• United Kingdom
14 Feb 16
@Beatburn I'm not quite sure why you called me to this discussion - lol - do you think I'm an expert on romantic kisses just 'cos I've been married a long time?? Anyway, I very rarely give credence to studies like this, but romantic kisses are most definitely a part of being in love, in my culture.
4 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Feb 16
True, but I read it in summer and could not wait to share this important study. Thank you to have shared this discussion today. @jaboUK Maybe he just wanted to share this romantic study with you for Valentine's day?
2 people like this
@jaboUK (56222)
• United Kingdom
15 Feb 16
@topffer That's probably it, as I'd done my own post on Valentine's Day.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (56222)
• United Kingdom
14 Feb 16
This post was suggested to me by Beatburn, so my views on it are on his comment.
3 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Feb 16
*Searching for @Beatburn 's response*.... Done *Reading Beatburn's response*.... Done *Commenting back*.... Done My comments are under Beatburn's response.
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
17 Feb 16
@Beatburn It is interesting, because I always thought that the "You Might Also Like" was using tags to suggest discussions, and I do not tag my discussions. It seems that the system is improving.
1 person likes this
@TLChimes (4842)
• United States
15 Aug 15
Maybe the intent we put behind a romantic kiss is expressed in those other countries, in a different way? .... Like the Prince said - maybe a nose rub or a tickle behind the .... um.... ear.... yeah.... ear.
3 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
I am not very ticklish behind my ears. If I was I would have hard time with my glasses.
3 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
Behind the knee might be another good romantic spot to tickle, but I would definitely avoid the armpit region if romance is what you are after.
1 person likes this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
@purplealabaster I would add under the feet, but it is a lying position, and lies are harmful for a couple.
4 people like this
@garymarsh6 (15716)
• United Kingdom
8 Jun 16
That is odd about Russians I was not aware they were like that! I have not witnessed it when I was there!
3 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
9 Jun 16
Lol, it is usually reserved to family members. Let's say that I was speaking of a family business.
2 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
Hahaha ... there is ONE thing French that I am proficient in ...
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
Not bad, it is a first stage. Maybe are you gifted for tongues ?
2 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
@topffer I am most certainly gifted with my tongue just as long as it is not being used for speaking.
3 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
@topffer By the way, I am the only one in this discussion and you are still too slow ... are you practicing your kissing techniques or do we have to get you a new battery for your wheelchair?
3 people like this
@Rosekitty (19435)
• San Marcos, Texas
15 Aug 15
I might have to wait a few years till i am an Adult...
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
You should be now. I was already in your classroom when I was wearing short trousers.
2 people like this
@Rosekitty (19435)
• San Marcos, Texas
15 Aug 15
@topffer oh but that was so long ago.....at least 2 days...
1 person likes this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
@Rosekitty 2 days ? It is why I am still wearing short trousers (and today it is true. I have a Bermuda short).
2 people like this
@1wldngl (3991)
• United States
15 Aug 15
What's a non romantic kiss? I mean if "lip to lip" is romantic....prolonged or not...what is non romantic? I don't know if I want to know that...scratch my question please!
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
A kiss on the hand of a lady ? a kiss on the forehead ? A kiss on the neck ? A kiss under the neck ?
3 people like this
@1wldngl (3991)
• United States
15 Aug 15
@topffer Dude...the hand kiss is even romantic....so...again...this study is silly!
2 people like this
• United States
15 Aug 15
Kiss my tushie, perhaps?
2 people like this
@phyrre (2322)
• United States
15 Aug 15
This is an interesting study. I wonder, if they went around asking for a kiss, did they assume that a slap in the face accounted for someone who didn't kiss? xD are they rubbing noses or what Here, that's called an Eskimo kiss, and it's a legitimate form of expressing affection. Eskimos are people too, ya know. It's called a kunik, and the true Inuit kunik is a bit different than the Westerner's "Eskimo kiss," but that's what it's based off of. :) Affection is very different in America than elsewhere. It's often considered "weird" to get too close to other people or touch them. I'm not sure why that is. I had a good friend in college from Belgium, and it was weird for her to get used to college over here sometimes because we don't do la bise here (though, of course, we did with her after we were friends). My mother also dated a Puerto Rican who did the same thing, too. :) Also, can I claim to be too young for this conversation? Define "adult". I'm fairly certain that @purplealabaster doesn't qualify, so can I tattle on her for sneaking in? :P
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
It looks like you dated an Eskimo? La bise is something serious. There is all a ceremonial around. Depending of the area where you are, you have to give the first one to the left or right cheek (if you don't start on the same cheek, it will be an Eskimo kiss), and to do the right number (it is better to agree). I put a link to an article giving you the maps for France to not commit a mistake. If you swear me that I will not be an innocent victim of a cross-shot between purplealabaster and you, you can tattle on her.
Par quelle joue commencer ? Combien faut-il en faire ? On vous dit tout
1 person likes this
@phyrre (2322)
• United States
15 Aug 15
@topffer I promise to leave you out of my tattling! I'm just gonna tell her mother on her, and she can deal with it. My grandmother's got a cane, and she's not afraid to use it! Oh yes, I know that! It's really confusing. I had to research la bise for a book I was writing to try to figure out the way my character would do it. It was really quite fascinating. :D Also very confusing to try to keep straight which side to start on, if it's two times or three times, etc. How do you manage to remember it all? xD
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
15 Aug 15
@phyrre I will not put my nose in your home affairs. I am from an area where people do 3 kisses. An old woman told me that it was for the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, a kind of sign of the cross to wish peace to people. Since I learned that, I think that it is the only right number, even if we are a minority, so I say always : "How many kisses ? For me it is 3 !" and I do 3 kisses. Your character was French or Belgian ?
1 person likes this
@allknowing (78637)
• India
17 Aug 15
Get a copy of the Kama Sutra and there you will lfind everything you wish to know about what happens in India.
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
17 Aug 15
I would not have thought that the Kama Sutra had something to do with romantic kisses.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (78637)
• India
17 Aug 15
@topffer More than that
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
17 Aug 15
@allknowing I will not ask you to give me a quote, as this discussion is PG-rated.
2 people like this
• United States
9 Jun 16
most interestin', this study. i supposed 'tis like most'n there's not a vast pool 'f folks'n which they've gathered all this "scientific" info?
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
9 Jun 16
If it is was a field study, it looks like some "scientists" were better than others to get a romantic kiss.
2 people like this
@SIMPLYD (88303)
• Philippines
17 Aug 15
For me it becomes romantic when it is exchanged by lovers . Kiss between family members can't be called a romantic one . My thoughts.
2 people like this
@topffer (37792)
• France
17 Aug 15
I follow you on this point. I was a bit sarcastic when I spoke about Russians in the discussion : their local custom is to kiss on the lips their family and friends, and these kisses are indeed not romantic kisses.
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (16421)
31 Aug 17
I was replying to @DianneN 's latest post about her doctor kissing her, when I saw this discussion. Guess hers is not a romantic kiss (he was gay she said).
1 person likes this
@topffer (37792)
• France
31 Aug 17
He was perhaps participating to this scientific experiment?
1 person likes this
@YrNemo (16421)
31 Aug 17
@topffer We have to tell the lady this!
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (47868)
• Centralia, Missouri
8 Jun 16
all I have to say is you have good questions, Researchers can make a study result in whatever they want by manipulating the group being studied. For example Dr Bob decides all american women are fat. So he does a study to prove this. Only those eligible to be IN the study are 20-50 year old women under 5 feet tall and over 200 pounds. Boom, he get's his results. Not all studies are like that, some do try to be unbiased, but MANY do not.
1 person likes this
@topffer (37792)
• France
8 Jun 16
We have/had this in archeology, it is called "new" archeology, and was popular 25 years ago. Half of the studies of new archeologists are good to be put to the trash. What is sad is that some searchers were brilliant and could not realize what was wrong with their theories : they had not voluntarily biased their studies, but they had missed a lot of data making them useless.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
9 Jun 16
@topffer oh that's pretty sad!
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16985)
• Canada
9 Jun 16
Does WTF stand for? Is it what the F u c k? Not sure if this is an important question but just asking? I've also seen whiskey tango foxtrot but not sure if that makes sense?
WTF definition, Slang. What the Fuck?! (used to express anger, impatience, surprise, etc.) See more.
1 person likes this
@topffer (37792)
• France
9 Jun 16
Affirmative Bravo lima uniform echo delta oscar lima lima, it was for what the f.... Roger so far.
1 person likes this
9 Jun 16
yes, sometimes you wonder where they get their information. :-)
1 person likes this
@topffer (37792)
• France
9 Jun 16
This study was obviously wrong somewhere, or I missed something.
@dainy1313 (2352)
• Leon, Mexico
16 Aug 15
(Joke) Well, on my "experienced kissing list" there are brassilian, canadien, french, italian, from uruguay (uruguayan?), argentine, but not central american yet. Damn! Who will teach those poor guys??? ( I cant sleep) Blessings Topfer... dainy
@topffer (37792)
• France
16 Aug 15
Hello Dainy, welcome back to myLot ! It is not a joke : I am collecting new data and volunteers for a new study Not bad, you are clearing our doubts for a large part of South America, but there is still a doubt for Central America. If I remember, there was a member from Panama in the past, I do not if he is back. Have you something to add for the study? I send you a PM. PMs are actually buggy and do not work for some members, so tell me if you have not received it.