Is there something wrong with my thinking..

@sharon6345 (118370)
United States
October 9, 2015 8:31pm CST
I would like you to be as honest as you possibly can. trust me I won't be upset. The reason I am asking this is because,people are trying to tell me I am stupid. I might be and that is fine with me. I just never thought it was true about me. See,I never thought I would ever find a man and be with him for what he can do for me. I always wanted someone that I could love an they love me back. My man does not pay a bill in my house. he does not give me money either. Nine times out of ten I am doing something for him. I stopped a lot during the past year before I found out he was cheating on me. I put that past me and since moved on. I just bought him a microwave,crock pot,dishes,glasses and more. Everyone is telling me I am stupid because,he does not support me. A good friend asked me do I think I would like a man to support me. I said,it would be nice but,that is not what I was looking for ever in a man. My mom raised me to do for myself and I am grown now and before I rely on any man to pay my bills I pay them myself. I don't see me changing any time soon. My daughter is 21 and if a man can't support her she does not want him. She has had problems in her current relationship due to him losing his job. He is very good at looking for one and when he had one she was spoiled rotten with gifts. I try my hardest to get her to understand how beautiful t feels to take care of yourself. Due to the fact that I take care of my own bills and my own savings. I no longer tell him anything about my money saved or when I have any at all. I feel it's my personal business and people think we should have one account. Not in my life time. Is there something wrong with me in this day and age? Thanks guys.
7 people like this
6 responses
@OneOfMany (12406)
• United States
10 Oct 15
Sounds like you and your daughter are polar opposites! I think you two are almost extremes representing both sides. I think somewhere in the middle is a good place to be. :)
3 people like this
@sharon6345 (118370)
• United States
10 Oct 15
Yes your right we sure are. I like the way I am and I know she loves it the way she is.
3 people like this
@OneOfMany (12406)
• United States
10 Oct 15
@sharon6345 Well people won't change the way they are just because of others, but I like the middle type. :P
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (118370)
• United States
10 Oct 15
@OneOfMany What exactly is the middle type? Thanks
3 people like this
@jstory07 (65293)
• Roseburg, Oregon
10 Oct 15
You should not be buying him all that stuff. The two of you should be taking care of your own bills and he should be buying for you and helping you out. He is the man. If you go dutch sometimes that is ok to. But he should be taking care of himself. You are not stupid at all. You are just a nice person that likes to do for others. And when you do others take advantage of you.
3 people like this
@Susan2015 (20161)
• United States
10 Oct 15
@jstory07 Yes very well put.
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (118370)
• United States
10 Oct 15
I left the mall today because,I did not find anything for myself and was about to buy him some clothes. lol. I know ..
2 people like this
@Tampa_girl7 (24889)
• United States
10 Oct 15
It is good not to depend on anyone to take care of us.
3 people like this
@jaboUK (53408)
• United Kingdom
10 Oct 15
Whoa! He cheated on you and still buy him all that stuff? The material things aren't so important as him cheating on you - if he's done it once he could do it again.
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (118370)
• United States
10 Oct 15
The worst that could be done to me already happened. Either I forgive and move on or forgive and try again. I chose to try again. I believe is you want it bad enough you can change. We shall see...
3 people like this
@jaboUK (53408)
• United Kingdom
10 Oct 15
@sharon6345 Well I hope you are right - good luck.
2 people like this
@Susan2015 (20161)
• United States
10 Oct 15
You are not stupid. But he should be paying some of the bills, at least half . But if any man cheated on me, he would be kicked out and I would find a man who only wants to be with me. Cheating is not acceptable to me. Once they do it, it could happen again.
2 people like this
@sharon6345 (118370)
• United States
10 Oct 15
we don't live together right now. And until money is dealt with differently we never will.
3 people like this
• United States
10 Oct 15
i was somewhat relieved to read through the responses, both yers 'n others, below. some folks'f a desire to nurture 'n o'erlook much. yer daughter might feel that way 'fter watchin' yer relationship with yer fella 'n seein' such 's unjust. folks can't judge others 'til they've walked in their shoes. i hope ya stay steadfast 'n 've a good support group 'round'ja. my mamaw always said 'a leopard ne'er really changes its spots'. if'n they do such'n their own desire, perhaps. changin' to appease 'nother i fear don't work fer the long term oft. best 'f luck to ya.
@sharon6345 (118370)
• United States
10 Oct 15
Thanks very much.
1 person likes this