Not Q uite 5:30 pm and Dark

@Hatley (157523)
Garden Grove, California
November 4, 2015 7:24pm CST
I do not l ike to make my son feel guilty for not coming to see me often but I w ish he wo uld not give me the run around when I ask him when he is coming to see me. darn I mean Im his mom, the only one he will ever have. I know he loves me as he has done so muc h for me but I really need to see him once a week. Hes not married nor has a girl friend so hes not tied down.He works all week of course. I do not want to nag as I hated that when my mom did that when I could not always come home for a visit when she wanted. Your take fellow mylotters. I do not want to make him dislike coming to see me.
11 people like this
11 responses
@jaboUK (49987)
• United Kingdom
5 Nov 15
It's a difficult one, but if it was me I wouldn't ask him to come, but when he does , let him see how delighted you are. That way he will feel good himself. But if you nag him and say why didn't you come before, you will only make him feel guilty and he won't enjoy coming to see you.
2 people like this
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Nov 15
yes thats exactly what I thought to as i remember getting u pset when my mom sort of nagged at me because I worked as a nurses aide andd my hours were often changedd so kmy plans haf tp be changed too.
2 people like this
@marlina (60551)
• Canada
6 Nov 15
Wise advice
1 person likes this
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
6 Nov 15
yes i ndeed it is and I got a great email from him explainingall thats been happ ening in his life like getting h is bike stolen someone cut the heavy bike lock while he and his working buddy where at lunch together . The lock was hacked open and his bike was gone. he wrote a f nny piece on my page on f Facebook about it as the bike was old and needed a lot of repairs but it w as also my sons only bike. so once he gets it replaced he will be able to see me, its all okay with us both.I m not going to be the nagging mom like my own mo was bless her heart.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Nov 15
My daughter is so self absorbed, that she does not communicate (email, text, Facebook or by phone), unless she wants something from me. You are lucky your son visits.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
6 Nov 15
yes I really a m m y best fri end Nelda thinks hes worng gutr her son is n ot wo rking while Robbie is doing two jobs so he does not h ave tons of time. im very pro ud of my son.
1 person likes this
@DeborahDiane (15852)
• Laguna Woods, California
5 Nov 15
Yes, it is getting dark quite early now, isn't it? Feels like midnight already.
1 person likes this
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Nov 15
l most startling to look out early afternoon and its already getting dark.
@Jessicalynnt (48190)
• Centralia, Missouri
5 Nov 15
It's just disrespectful to say you are coming and then not, although it could all happen to us now and then. Just limit the times you ask, so as not seen to be a nag!
• Centralia, Missouri
6 Nov 15
@Hatley oh no, i hope he gets his bike back!
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
6 Nov 15
@Jessicalynnt o h theres no hope of that not i n Midway ceity or S anta Ana both heavil;y populated with illegal mexican thugs who steal any thing that they can get awa with. Santa Ana is the worst glad he lice i n Mideay city but they were eating at a resta urant i n downtown Santa And when his bike was stolen. right outsidet the darned restaurant geez.
1 person likes this
• Centralia, Missouri
7 Nov 15
@Hatley sounds like a bike lock next time might help, maybe anyways, anything can get broken or cut
@celticeagle (114068)
• Boise, Idaho
5 Nov 15
He is probably tired after work and has things he needs to accomplish on his days off. I wonder if you two could decide on a certain day. If you told him what you have said here and then that knowing what day he was coming would elevate your need to always be asking him and making him feel bad. Maybe that would work.
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Nov 15
hi @celticeage he sent me al ong email early this mo rning. Someone stole his bike and thats complicated his life plus having f section 8 ins pection todaty o his apart ment. WE agreed he had some things to wo rk through and some time next week he will be able to co me see me. You are right your s uggestions good and so mewhat to what we decided I never want himn to f eel guilty and then dislike coming tio see me. Our time together is always good.,
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (114068)
• Boise, Idaho
6 Nov 15
@Hatley ...Well, that is good. and I am glad you found some remedy.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Nov 15
It has to be difficult wanting to see your son and wondering if he's going to visit. I wouldn't nag him and just be delighted when he shows up. It sounds as if you have a loving son even if you don't see him as often as you'd like.
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
6 Nov 15
Yes @Marilyhnda1225 I really do as he is always there for me if I need help and Im going to be m uch more grateful an show it as its so easy to take a loved one forgranted odd that my best feriend thinks he does n ot see me enou gh as her son is still out pf work and a momas bou at 31 while myh son s 55 an working two jobs to make ends meet so he does no t have all the time that her MIke has. My son is very loving and very good to me too. but he has a right toi a life of his o wn too even as a bachelor lol.
@Tampa_girl7 (21242)
• United States
5 Nov 15
Just enjoy your visits when he does come.
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
6 Nov 15
you are so right and also I need to show more a ppreciation of him as we get so used to oursons and forget to say thanks for all their help
@LadyDuck (118143)
• Switzerland
5 Nov 15
Patsie, do not ask him to come to see you, if you do, he would feel guilty if he cannot and he would even avoid to reply to the phone. I know that I only have one Mom and I would love to see her more often, but we live many miles from her and I have to take care of my husband too.
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Nov 15
thats one plus f or us in that hes just a mile or t wo f rom where I live but he emailed me that he had his bike stolen and also today he has section 8 inspectionon his apartment b ut he will let me know that he will stop in sometime mid week I was fine with that hes a bachelor but with work and som e other committments he has only so much free ti e. I let him set the times now so he will not feel guilty and we can spe nd a little time together.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (56881)
• Roseburg, Oregon
5 Nov 15
He is probably busy working and to tired after work. He should come and see you on his days off.
@Hatley (157523)
• Garden Grove, California
5 Nov 15
He emailed me he has had some complications as someone stole his bike pl ua he is now working two jobs so he promised he would o come ee me somtim e mid week next week.now we are both happy
@zebra2222 (4897)
• United States
7 Nov 15
I can understand that you want to see your son. You'll have to work it out so that both of you are content and happy with the arrangement.
@Shellyann36 (8454)
• United States
6 Nov 15
I think its hard to get kids to come see their parents. My oldest is 26 and I am seeing him more now than I have in the last 4 years because he is staying with us for a while. It makes my day! My 25 year old stops by at least twice a month and my 22 year old, if I hear from him its because I have sent him a message on FB or an email. You are not in the boat alone.